Mockingbird Hill Cottage

Life in our little cottage in the country

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Quiet

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2-7 still life

Still Life with Camera. I love the light in this shot, the way it hits the pottery, the vivid blue reflection on the wall, the shadows, the darkish form of the camera. It’s a late afternoon portrait of a corner of the den.

I rose at 5:30 this morning – too early – but there you go. I woke up. I felt like I’d slept well and I wanted to get downstairs and see if Scout needed to avail herself of the outdoor facilities. She did. All is well.

Don had a fitful night, as he is in the throes of this not-at-all-fun head cold. There’s been no sound from the bedroom, so I hope he’s sleeping. I love this early morning time, when it’s quiet and Scout is sleeping at my feet. The other day, when Don work up before me, he was actually disappointed when I came down the stairs soon after. He had been looking forward to some quiet time on his own.

I get it.

I’ve found that more and more as I grow older, I crave quiet. It wasn’t that many years ago when I would routinely turn on the Today show in the morning to catch up on what had happened in the world overnight. Now, I wouldn’t think of doing that. I don’t want the sound of the television intruding into my world.

In fact, we hardly ever have the TV on during the day – only on those rare occasions that we feel the need to check on an important news story. Or check in on a big weather event. I suppose the internet has helped with that. We can go online now and read up on the news. Or check the weather. Or choose not to have anything to do with either of those things.

Quiet soothes my soul. Quiet helps me think. I have been involved in music and sounds and words and performance for most of my life. When I am working, I am surrounded by sounds. So is Don. There are times I noodle on the piano, or play music on the stereo, and of course, I love hearing Don play his guitar.

But mostly I love quiet.

Right now, I hear the clicks and sounds of water moving through the baseboard heaters. I hear the creaks and groans of a 124 year old house. I hear the occasional sigh from Dame Scout. Occasionally, my ears catch the sound of a car driving by. But mostly, it’s quiet.

We guard that quiet. If one of us wants to turn on the television during the day for some reason, we always ask the other if it’s okay. We know how important the quiet is – especially in this little cottage – for reading, for creating, for thinking.

2-7 sunset

Last night’s sunset

Since the early days of blogging – and I’m coming up on my 7th anniversary of blogging in 10 days – I’ve had the volume turned all the way down on my computer. I only turn it up when I’m watching a video or a movie on Netflix. Otherwise? All the way down. To zero. When we first started blogging, in those long ago days, bloggers often had music playlists on their blogs. Do you remember those? I do. I found them intrusive, simply because I didn’t want to click on a blog and be jolted by someone else’s choice in music. So I learned to turn the volume down. End of problem. I enjoyed the blog post and didn’t have to worry about the music. Then more and more of us began to have ads on our blogs. Most of those ads are simply ads – silent. But some have audio. Or video. Or both.

I never hear them because I keep the volume down.

One of my longtime and dear readers wrote yesterday to say that she had heard an audio ad on the blog and was unhappy about that. I completely understand. I don’t like them either. There’s not a whole lot I can do about it. Ads change on any given blog according to the reader of that blog’s browsing habits. When I click on my blog, I might very well see a different ad than you do, even if you click on the blog at the exact same time. I’m sure you’ve all searched for something on your computer – maybe something like a lamp – and then proceeded to see ads for lamps appearing on other sites, including blogs. It’s unnerving; kind of like Big Brother watching you.

And I have to have ads. If I don’t, the blog will cease to exist. It’s that simple.

Anyway, this is all to say that I don’t have a whole lot of control about that sort of thing. You could write me and tell me one kind of ad is showing when you read the blog and I will check here and not see it. If you don’t like the audio, simply turn your volume down. That will serve you well as you cruise around the internet. Believe me, you can be assaulted by sound on any site.

That’s why I keep my volume down. I like quiet. I like to read. I don’t want intrusive sounds coming out of nowhere.

Which reminds me of the time I was sitting here in the peaceful, quiet early morning only to hear the beep of a smoke alarm. Loud, obnoxious, but not the beep that happens when there really is a problem. No, this one was more subtle. A beep here. A beep there. Then quiet. And then, just as I was thinking that little glitch had taken care of itself, it happened again. And again. It took a long time, but I finally tracked it down to the alarm in our bedroom. Somehow, a fly got in there and it set off the alarm.

Then it was back to quiet.

Happy Saturday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

Heading Toward 7: On The State of This Blog

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treereflection

Absolutely nothing to do with this post, except to tell you the tree is still up. We like it that way.

Some days, like today, I wake up and have no idea what the hell I’m going to write about. It happened a couple of days ago, as well. And I think to myself, for a split second, maybe it’s time to let it go and move on.

Just for a split second.

Trying to come up with new and original content every day is sometimes overwhelming. At other times, it’s a breeze. But it’s the days when nothing seems interesting or exciting or momentous in any way, where the internet itself gets to me, whether through hacked emails or hacking attempts on this blog or the sheer enormity of the internet juggernaut that seems to be careening out of control, or when I get tired of my own voice – those are the hard days.

I don’t pull content or photos from elsewhere on the web, though I suppose that might make things easier. But I’m an original content blogger. It’s just the way I’m wired. I’m all for adapting and change but that’s one change I cannot bring myself to make. I can’t do it any other way – this blog is my voice, my thoughts, my ‘brand’ if you will, no one else’s. It’s why I consistently turn down offers that come from writers or companies wanting to do guest posts. And, believe me, there are a lot of them in my inbox on any given day. No judgment here, just a sense of what is right for me.

Blogging has changed and change can be good. I recently read a great post from a well-known blogger, Tsh Oxenreider of The Art of Simple. Here’s the link if you’re interested. In the post she explores the way blogging has changed in the eight years she’s been at it and proceeds to clarify her blogging intentions.

It resonated with me because these are the things many of us wrestle with. I’ll admit it: I liked her conclusions.

What’s changed?

Comments are down – Yes, they are, though I am pleased to have a loyal group of readers who comment on a daily basis. But I only have to go back about a year ago to see that I used to get many more comments. The reasons cited? Lots more blogs out there, lots more social media that competes for a reader’s attention. I love the conversation that goes on here and I answer almost every comment. But I’ve been a less than constant commenter on other’s blogs. I need to work on that. Let me add that I appreciate that you read the blog whether you comment or not. Truly. Don’t feel you have to.

Threaded comments (which allow the back-and-forth conversations we have) are one of the best things to happen to this blog, in my humble opinion.

Attention spans are shorter – Oy. Don’t get me going on this one. It’s true. Many readers seem to want to read things in shorter doses. Or they prefer Instagram or Facebook. Or Twitter. I use all those platforms, but very sparingly indeed, because I’m all about the power of the written word here on this blog. Not captions under Instagram photos, though I certainly enjoy seeing them. Not whatever the word limit is on a tweet. And Facebook is nice, but if I have a choice to write here on the blog or post an update on MHC’s Facebook page, guess what’s going to win out?

If you have a short attention span, you’re probably not going to keep reading this blog. I don’t care that the conventional wisdom seems to be ‘write shorter posts.’ That ain’t me.

As for Pinterest, I constantly read how much traffic it drives to blogs and I know it’s true. It’s a fact. I use Pinterest, but not very often. And I find I use it because I feel I ‘should.’ That’s not a good reason to spend time there that I could be spending elsewhere in my life. So no more ‘shoulds’ for me. I’ll only be there when I want to be there. If I have less traffic, so be it.

Ad income is down – Yes, it is. Ads, especially banner ads like those on this blog, are not as good a source of income as they used to be. Advertisements on blogs are evolving. It’s troubling for those of us who count on ad income to help pay some bills, so many bloggers are doing more and more sponsored content and I totally understand that. I don’t do very much of it here, just the occasional post. These are all things I have to wrestle with as I move forward. I will explore other options as long as the integrity of this blog remains my first priority. I’m heading toward my seventh anniversary of blogging (on February 17th) and I’ve put in a lot of time and effort to bring the blog to where it is at this point in time. It must be my authentic (a word that is overused these days, sorry!) voice. There’s no other option.

Tsh says, “As for me, I’m all over old-fashioned blogging.” Me, too. That, for me, means original content, longer posts, posts where my voice is the one you’re hearing, not that of a sponsor (unless it’s something I really believe in and even then, you’ll hear my voice.) I post every day. That may change, it may not. If there’s a day where I simply can’t come up with anything, I’ll take it as an indication that I just might need a day off.

I used to post about blogging more often. I used to post tips about photo editing and all sorts of things related to blogging. I even had plans to start a blogging-help-kind-of-blog. But two things made me stop doing that. Number one: There’s already a lot of content out there about blogging, lots and lots of blogging advice. I also realized that I’ve grown averse to giving advice because there are as many ways to blog as there are bloggers. My way is most likely not your way, nor should it be.

But here’s the other thing: A lot of my readers don’t blog. They like reading blogs but don’t really care about they whys and hows of blogging.

So, my friends, posts like this one will be few and far between.

I’m in a reflective stage as I head toward my blogging anniversary on February 17th. Seven years. Who’d have thunk it? It has been a joy and a challenge. It has been very hard and effortless. But above all, it has been a tremendously rewarding creative outlet for my thoughts and ideas. It has been the writing discipline that I needed. It has taught me the joy of the camera. It has brought you into my life.

So thanks for your patience as I sort through and clarify my feelings about this blog and blogging in general.

I’m still here.

Happy Thursday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

On Absolutes

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tech-notech

I’m thinking out loud today.

Thought I really don’t follow astrology, I am a Scorpio. And Scorpios seem to be people who feel passionately about all sorts of things. That certainly is true about me. I tend to lead with my heart, though I’m getting much better at balancing that with some wise input from my head. It’s something I’ve struggled with over the years.

Some of the things I feel passionately about I wouldn’t change for a second. Those issues and/or beliefs form the core of who I am, who I’ve become during the course of my life. I could not abandon them.

But then there are the new things or changes that I sometimes have an immediate reaction to as in “I will never do that!” These are what I call ‘absolutes.’ I’m sure Don has heard many absolutes spring forth from my lips over the years. He’s a patient guy. He simply nods in acceptance. Though, sometimes he challenges me to look at the whole thing differently, playing the part of the devil’s advocate. That’s a good thing.

One of the things I am working on is releasing my tendency to be quick to judge – whether it involves a person, a situation (which is undoubtedly more complex than I deem it to be) or something new that I tend to immediately judge and reject.

I distinctly remember when cell phones first started to become popular. My reaction at the time? “I don’t want everyone to be able to contact me at any time of the day!” I didn’t want students calling me all the time. I didn’t want someone to be able to call me when I was driving my car. I didn’t want to be ‘on call.’ So I resisted for quite a while. But when Don and I moved across the country, driving two different vehicles, we realized that we needed cell phones to communicate with each other. (We also used walkie-talkies!) And we realized that it was a good idea to have a cell phone in case of emergencies.

I’ve used various incarnations of the cell phone. Now I have an iPhone and I love it. It works well, it takes good photos, I can access my email, which is something I do most often when I’m working away from home. I can check the weather, I can listen to music when I’m sitting on a noisy train headed into the city. I don’t often use it to go online, though I know many people do. I don’t have my head buried in it, either. I use it when necessary and I love it’s convenience. It’s made a difference in my life, which is often spent away from home for weeks at a time.

Yes, I find people who talk loudly and endlessly on their cell phones annoying and rude. Yes, I shake my head at those who walk around the city with their heads downward, immersed in whatever is on their screen. As with anything, there are those who will go overboard, who will push the boundaries of polite behavior. But that doesn’t mean I have to. It’s possible to have and use a cell phone without automatically plunging into the abyss.

My ‘absolute’ changed.

Similarly…the Kindle. If you search this blog I know that you’ll find some posts where I said I would absolutely never get an eReader. No way! I am a book lover and my love of the real deal, the three dimensional kind, is well documented, in life and on this blog.

An ‘absolute.’

Then, last Christmas, my husband mentioned that he wanted a Kindle Paperwhite. Okay. I researched it and found it to be intriguing. I thought about the demands of my life. Weeks spent away from home, a need to have lots of books on hand to read, not to mention the fact that I review books and many of them are easily downloaded as eGalleys/Review Copies. Oh, and I have a LOT of books and limited space in which to store them. The Paperwhite was sounding more and more intriguing. Much to my surprise, I asked Don to buy me one for Christmas!

I learned another valuable lesson. You can exist in both worlds. One doesn’t cancel out the other. There doesn’t have to be an ‘absolute.’ You’ve only to read the book blog or this blog to know how many hardcover and paperback books I buy. The quick answer? A lot.

But I also give away a lot of books because I have no room on my shelves for them.

The eReader gives me the chance to download several books if I’m going away to Hartford, for example, to work for five weeks. (I might add that at the same time I’m in Hartford, I also check out books from Hartford’s library – the three-dimensional kind.) The Kindle gives me access to lots of free books, especially classics. I use the Kindle to download review copies from various sources. It’s been invaluable in discovering new authors to review on Just Let Me Finish This Page and in reviewing books for this blog, as well.

I’ve found that my ‘absolute’ really doesn’t hold water. For me, clinging to that absolute would have narrowed the range of possibilities for me as a reader and book reviewer. Ultimately, it wouldn’t have served me well.

So I happily say, and did say on this blog, that I was wrong. Using an eReader didn’t mean I was abandoning hardcover/paperback books. If anything, I’ve purchased more than ever. I check books out from my local library. Sometimes I love the Kindle/eGalley version of a book so much that I purchase it in hardcover because I want it in my permanent collection.

Despite what some studies have stated, I retain just as much when I read an eBook as I do when I read a three-dimensional book. And, I can get a book immediately, if I so choose.

No abyss. Just, for me, a nicely workable balance between two different methods of reading.

Same thing with blogging, which is ever changing. I can adapt to some of those changes and, at the same time, retain the integrity of my blog. And I can certainly choose the things I want to embrace and reject those things that aren’t right for me. I’ve made a choice recently to accept the fact that there are all sorts of ways in which to blog and that the variety out there means there is something for everybody. It just adds spice to the blog stew and that’s a good thing. I’m letting go of those judgments. And really, what makes me think I have all the expertise and wisdom on any subject? Short answer: I don’t.

Some absolutes need to be re-examined. I find I’m doing that more often.

Heck, I once held an absolute that stated: “I will never get married. I don’t want to lose my independence. I need my alone time. Spending that much time with anyone would either bore me or drive me out of my mind.”

Thankfully, I smacked myself upside the head and re-examined that one when I met Don. I haven’t lost my independence. I do get my alone time. But here’s the thing: I’ve found that being with Don is my favorite place to be. I’m never bored. And if I go out of my mind, it’s not due to Don.

You can have the best of both worlds. One doesn’t negate the other.

Oh, the lessons I keep on learning.

New post up on Just Let Me Finish This Page.

Happy Monday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

 

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