Mockingbird Hill Cottage

Mockingbird Hill Cottage

You are here: Home / Archives for life

Sunset

at by

We had a spectacular sunset last night.

11-10 sunset2

11-10 sunset3

11-10 sunset1

You can see the mountains in this shot.

11-10 sunset4

It changed from second to second, so I took lots of pictures.

My camera is a source of comfort to me. It grounds me and pulls me out of my head and into the present.

I slept in today. For the first time since I flew to Florida, I feel like I got a healthy chunk of sleep time. I’m also dealing with a sinus thing – not surprising, given the stress that’s been ongoing.

I don’t quite know what to do with myself. I try to read, and I do, but losing myself for an hour in  the pages of a book is hard. I clean – that seems to help, as it gives me a specific task to do. Mostly, I take it easy, as prescribed by my husband. And I watch reruns of Frasier, because it makes me laugh.

I received two packages in the mail yesterday and I’ll share them with you tomorrow.

Happy Tuesday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

 

After. Home.

at by

I’m home.

11-8 dad'sview

(My dad’s favorite view from his chair.)

Walking through my parents’ condo yesterday, for presumably the last time, was far more devastating emotionally than I was prepared for. It left me shaken and sobbing.

I’ve come home to my husband, to quiet, to the realization that I’m an orphan. To the realization that my birthday, which is in 13 days, will my first without both my parents. To the realization that I will never hear my dad’s voice again.

I’ve come home to a landscape in which every tree that had autumn-colored leaves when I left is now bare. I’ve come home to a dog who is frailer than she was when I left, which worries me.

I’m not comfortable writing an entire ‘poor me’ post. So, I’ll make this short. I almost didn’t post today and the regularity of my posting might be a bit erratic this week. I’m taking time for the enormity of this to sink in. I need to allow myself the time and space in which to grieve.

My Little Z and my furry nephew Max helped to distract me by the sheer amount of love and joy emanating from their beings. For that I am forever grateful.

11-8 dinosaur

Yesterday, Z hid behind a wall in the kitchen and, as I passed by, wheeled his walker out and ‘scared’ me. He said “ROAR!” He was a dinosaur. (Pardon the blurry iPhone photo, but that kid was in constant motion.) He made me smile and laugh. I love that boy.

I love my Maxie, too. When he sensed I was leaving, he followed me everywhere, even into the bathroom when I took a shower.

And I love my sister and brother-in-law and my other nephews. My sister and I have shared something that is profound and deeply sad. I don’t know if I could have done it without her. It was hard leaving them yesterday but I was ready to come home.

Don is also an orphan. He understands.

Anyway, I’m rambling a bit here. Thank you all for your support and compassion.

I’m hanging in there.

Happy Sunday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

Heading Home

at by

11-7sunset

Florida has some spectacular sunsets. I’ve seen more than a few since I first arrived over a week ago. I’ll miss them, but I remind myself that the winter skies in my neck of the woods also bring gorgeous sunsets.

11-7sunsetplane

That black speck is a plane.

This morning we will send off some of my dad’s paintings (he loved to paint in oils) to my brother’s children and my cousin. I’ve packed up a box to send to the cottage of pictures and items that remind me of my parents; wind chimes, three of my mother’s crosses (she collected them), my dad’s golf hat, some tools that my dad used, bits and bobs. I’m also sending home a small painting that my dad did fairly recently and an oil painting that I’ve always loved that was painted by my great-aunt Ruth, my maternal grandmother’s sister. I have one of Ruth’s paintings on the wall at home – it’s the small painting of the farmhouse in Canada where they lived as children.

We’ll also do a bit more sorting today. Then it’s off to the airport to fly home. I’ll miss my family here, there has been enormous comfort in being with them for ten days. But it’s time to be comforted by my husband and my little furry girl, to be enveloped in a big husbandly hug, to have some quiet time in which I can come to terms with the death of my father.

I finished the first obsession scarf and have started on the second.

 

11-7newscarf

This one is a bit heavier in weight and is a mix of lovely blues and turquoises and greens. I will be listing both of them – and maybe more, if I keep this up – on Etsy. I’ll get a better picture of these colors when I get back home and can use my big girl camera.

I’m so glad I stayed down here. Meredith and I needed to be with each other. I was able to take care of a lot of necessary tasks while Mer was at work. We drew strength from each other when we were sorting through things at the condo. We were able to make decisions more efficiently.

Yesterday, after more errands, Meredith said, “Do you want to go out to lunch?” I had been thinking the same thing. We haven’t had time to just be, the two of us. It was so nice to stop and breathe and do something, anything, that wasn’t a task that had to be done. I suspect my dad’s death will hit us both in ways we can’t imagine in the coming weeks.

There is a lot more to be done with Dad’s estate, but that will take time. In the meantime, we need to breathe and think and remember.

Happy Saturday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

 

 

Lambs Like to Party

Lambs Like to Party

A Note

Thanks for visiting! Feel free to browse, read and enjoy. All content is my own; including photos and text. Please do not use anything on this site without permission.

Disclosure/Privacy Policy can be found in the Navigation Bar under ‘About MHC.’

Also, I love receiving comments! I do, however, reserve the right to delete any comment that is in poor taste, offensive or is verging on spam. It’s my blog. If you’re a bot or a troll you’ll be blocked. Thanks!

Archives