Mockingbird Hill Cottage

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You are here: Home / Archives for life

On Loss

August 8, 2013 at 9:02 am by Claudia

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This is a week of loss. And I’m very sad.

A few days ago, my dear friend of 56 years lost her mother. Her mother was a very important part of my life from the age of four on. I truly loved Mrs. Orr. I spent a lot of time with her. She was a lovely person who made me laugh and cared for me and fed me Italian food and gave me my first hair cut. She was widowed at a young age and she fiercely and lovingly raised her two daughters on her own. Her daughter Jackie is my oldest friend. I was in her wedding. Last night, I called Jackie and we shared memories of her mom and of our adventures and of the laughter we all shared together. Because that’s what I remember the most – laughing until tears rolled down our faces. Jackie and I have the kind of friendship that is strong and rooted and that is not dependent on daily phone calls, or physically seeing each other. It’s just there. Always.

Mrs. Orr lived a long and full life. For that, I am very grateful. It doesn’t make her passing any easier, however.

This morning I was trying to cobble together a post, when I received an email from another childhood friend who I’ve known since first grade. I’ve written about Debbie before. She has been battling cancer for many years now, with grace and dignity, rooted in a strong faith. She lost her mother (who was my Girl Scout troupe leader) to cancer many years ago. Her sister Karen died three years ago from cancer. In the course of her own treatment, she reconnected with our high school pal, Corinne. Corinne was also battling cancer. They formed a bond and helped each other through the rough times.

I also reconnected with Corinne on Facebook. And then she started reading this blog. She wrote beautiful emails to me about my writing and my life and the many things we shared in common and her battle with cancer, and then she learned how to leave a comment here on the blog and I was so happy to have her back in my life – this adult life, so many years after we graduated from high school.

She died last night.

It was shocking and unexpected. She had some complications and an infection started and, suddenly, it was over.

I am shocked and saddened and angry at what cancer has done to so many beloved people in my life.

Suddenly the post I had been working on lost its appeal. I am in mourning this week for dear ones who are no longer with us. I am filled with sadness for those who are left behind; left to grieve the loss of a parent, a grandmother, a wife.

Rest in peace, Corinne. Rest in peace, Mrs. Orr. I am blessed to have known you. You were everything that is good and honest and true. Thank you for being in my life.

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Filed Under: friends, life 88 Comments

What I’ve Been Doing

August 4, 2013 at 7:55 am by Claudia

sundesk

Sitting at this desk an awful lot – when I’m not at rehearsal.

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Watching my Red Sox. This is the perk of being in Hartford; I can watch every Red Sox game. (They won this one.)

sunbook

Reading my third Louise Penny mystery. This woman can really write. I’m a big fan.

sunpurpleflowers

Watering my plant with the purple flowers. It’s nice to have something green and thriving in this apartment.

sunbaseballcaps

Looking at the acronym for the Williamstown Theatre Festival and thinking how it represents something I say quite often. (Yes, I can use some salty language with the best of ’em.)

sunsunset

Catching the sunset through my apartment window.

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Wandering around the apartment, taking pictures. Notice my haircut? Much shorter.

It’s Sunday and I have another full day of rehearsal ahead. (By the way, for those of you who asked, we rehearse 6 out of 7 days a week. Monday is our day off.)  I had been thinking I might go home for a day or two, so when the director said we were to rehearse until 7 pm today, my heart sank.  I wouldn’t get home until 9 or 10 and I’d have to return either Monday night or early Tuesday morning. That particular turnaround would be too tight.

So I’m a wee bit disappointed. For some reason, I’m having a hard time being here. Maybe it’s because I was just here for a 5 week stretch. Certainly, the fact that Don and I have been apart for over 7 months in the last year plays a big part, along with the fact that he was home for only one day before I had to leave for Hartford.

I’m restless. I haven’t worked one-on-one with the actors yet, so I feel curiously detached. All of the table work on the text, something I normally love, isn’t doing it for me. I know that will change as we move away from the table and I establish a relationship with the actors. I just have to be patient and know I will soon become immersed in this process.

I’m grateful for the work, that goes without saying. Don’s grateful for the work that comes his way. We get it. It’s good to have a job and we utter thanks every day. But seven out of twelve months spent apart is kicking my butt to the curb.

Since I’m woefully behind in reading blogs and commenting, I’m trying to use the little free time I have to visit you all. I apologize for my lack of comments and I’m going to remedy that.

Don gave Scout a bath. I wish I could nuzzle my nose in her silky hair.

And I’ve been eating too many mini chocolate bars at rehearsal.

Must stop.

Happy Sunday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

 

Filed Under: life, On The Road 42 Comments

On Being a Seasoned Decorator: Who Cares about Trends?

July 26, 2013 at 9:23 am by Claudia

galvanized

Orange and pink look pretty good together, don’t they?

I was thinking about the ubiquitous phrase ‘trends in decorating’ yesterday. I see it everywhere; certainly all over blogland. The design industry, whether it be for the home or fashion, is driven by ‘trends.’ Everything, including Twitter, seems to be driven by trends. (If I hear one more newscaster use the words, “Trending on Twitter” I’ll scream). I understand that. It’s all about marketing. Color of the year. The dreaded chevron. Mid-century modern. Burlap. Geometrical shapes. White. These are just a few of the many hot fads in design and design blogging. I know I’m missing several. Feel free to add more in your comments.

When I was younger, a whole lot younger, I followed the fads. That’s part of the pack mentality of being young and easily influenced by others, of wanting to belong. Nothing wrong with that. I’d venture to say it is expected. It’s the rare young person that can buck the crowd and follow his/her particular likes and not give a dang about what others think. They’re out there, however, those young people that march to the beat of a different drummer. I find that enormously comforting.

I’m a ‘seasoned’ adult now. I’m more comfortable in my skin. And I don’t give a dang about what is trendy. I can look at photos of white rooms and admire them, but I know in my heart that particular trend is not for me. I like color. I can admire the lines of a room full of mid-century modern furniture, but since I grew up in a house with that look, it’s not appealing to me. It’s simply been done.

Ever since I hit my twenties, I have been that someone who, when told that ‘everyone is doing it,’ makes a U-turn and goes the other way. I never did drugs. I didn’t care how many of my dorm friends were smoking marijuana – I didn’t like the smell. And when my friend in grad school tried to get me to try cocaine because ‘everyone loves it, trust me’ I left the room. All it took was hearing the words: everyone is doing it. Bye bye.

“If everyone jumped off the Empire State Building, would you?”  My mother asked me this frequently as I slogged my way through my teens. I bet most parents ask that question in some form. Congratulations, Mom. It took.

That’s my own particular sensibility. If you tell me that this or that is ‘in,’ chances are I will be making that U-turn. I’m a stubborn girl and telling me that something is in and I should partaking in it because it is in just makes me dig my heels further into the ground. We Hill girls are stubborn. Ask my dad. Or my husband.

One of the benefits of growing older is not caring anymore what others think. I no longer feel it necessary to follow the rules. Certainly my decorating style has evolved over the years as I have evolved. I decorate with the things I love, with as many colors as I want, with comfort and a dash of funkiness. I mix patterns. I have a lot of stuff. If I love something, it goes in the room. And if I truly love it, no matter what it is, it will work.

As I look at blogs and decorating books and magazines, my favorite rooms have always been those that are unique. That don’t follow the trends. That are a reflection of the person that lives, breathes, eats and daydreams in that room. That are funky and individual and full of surprises. That throw orange and pink together, thank you very much, and make it work. That look real. And, apologies to designers everywhere, that aren’t done by a designer. Because I can see that in a room from a mile away.

Being a seasoned decorator is a good thing. It’s freeing, don’t you think? We can do whatever we like. We’ve been through all the needing to belong stuff; we left that behind years ago. We don’t care about trends. We decorate for our needs, for our sensibilities. Isn’t that wonderful?

And by the way, the sensibilities of a seasoned decorator are not necessarily entirely defined by age. There’s a dash of ‘who cares?’ in there that I’ve seen in every age.

Thank goodness.

Happy Friday.

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Filed Under: decorating, life 63 Comments

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Welcome!

Welcome!

I live in a little cottage in the country with my husband. It's a sweet place, sheltered by old trees and surrounded by gardens. The inside is full of the things we love. I love to write, I love my camera, I love creating, I love gardening. My decorating style is eclectic; full of vintage and a bit of whimsy.

I've worked in the theater for more years than I can count. I'm currently a voice, speech, dialect and text coach freelancing on Broadway, off Broadway, and in regional theater.

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