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On Blogging: Why I No Longer Care About Stats and Competition

May 22, 2013 at 10:02 am by Claudia

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I’m thinking out loud here. Bear with me.

Though I’m sure I have a more than a bit of it in me, I’m not a super competitive person. When I recognize it rearing its ugly head, I feel uncomfortable. It’s not me. I don’t like what it brings out in me. I know there is a healthy form of competitiveness and, to a certain extent, it drives us to do better, to be better. When I used to audition for acting roles, which is all about competition, I was excited and triumphant if I was cast in the part. But usually, I didn’t see my fellow auditioners, so I was only in competition with myself, if that makes sense. I did the best I could and hoped it was enough.

Blogging has changed a great deal since I first started this blog over five years ago. What used to be a more intimate community of people sharing thoughts and ideas is now a much more competitive arena. Everyone is trying to get sponsors, ad income, affiliate links, big stats numbers. Everywhere I turn there is advice as to how to grow your  blog. I have benefited from some of that advice in the past. But now it’s all about numbers. How many visitors come to your blog, how long they stay, what other sites refer visitors to your blog, are you on google+ because you must be on google+, do the big bloggers consider you part of their pack, how much ad income do you generate, how many comments do you get, what’s your google ranking  – the list is endless.

And exhausting.

I’ve fallen prey to it in the past. I have to be honest about that. I took on ads because I needed the additional income. That income is very, very, very modest. I wanted bigger numbers because bigger numbers meant more ad income. I started posting every day because of it. (I’m glad I made that change – it’s a good discipline for me.) I looked at other blogs and wondered why they had such huge numbers. I still do. I felt a bit of resentment about the opportunities that seemed to come to younger bloggers and mommy bloggers but not to ‘seasoned bloggers’ as I call myself. I analyzed, assessed, compared and obsessed.

dogwood

Then I turned a corner. The sheer abundance of blogs out there left me feeling overwhelmed. And underwhelmed by lots of repetitive content. I saw blogs that I used to really enjoy for their personal, heartwarming content change into what might as well be called websites, for want of a better word. Every post became a tout for their business. I’ve stopped reading them. I’ve watched other bloggers try to come up with a new project, a new idea, all the time – and it was too much. I was exhausted for them. After seeing the first few blog posts about chevrons and pallets and grain sacks and horizontal stripes on walls, my eyes glazed over. How many times can you reinvent the wheel? The need to keep up, to find something someone else hasn’t blogged about, to generate constant new projects to keep stat numbers high – Oy. I know that lots of bloggers want to generate a healthy income from their blogs. I totally understand that. And many bloggers are perfectly content in that business-like, competitive atmosphere; indeed, even thrive in it. More power to them. I really mean that.

I don’t.

There, I’ve admitted it. I simply don’t thrive in a competitive atmosphere. I don’t want to. That’s part of the reason I left acting behind and became a teacher and coach.

That little fact doesn’t make me better, or worse, than anybody else. I’m not. I’m not condemning anyone. I’m just speaking about a change that has happened to me, in reference to this little blogging world of mine. Listen, let’s be totally honest here. I’d love to generate more ad income than I do. I’d love to get a book deal. I’m a good writer – I’m proud of my writing. I’d love to be considered a top blogger. I’m just like anybody else. I’ve worked hard over the past 5 years to create a place on the web that I’m proud of. I worked very hard on this blog’s design. The quality of my photography and my content is very, very important to me. But all of that is to please my aesthetic, to keep this blog at a level that I can be proud of and that enables me to connect to you in a meaningful way. Sometimes I fail. Most of the time, writing this blog makes me very happy. And that, my friends, is what is important to me; not numbers, not stats, not the latest way to get my blog out there, whether it be Pinterest or Facebook or Instagram or whatever – not any of it. Yes, I appreciate the extra income, and would I like more of it? Of course. In the end, however, it’s all about joy. And I don’t get joy from numbers (which might be the reason we file an extension every year with the IRS.) Numbers don’t do it for me. Numbers take away the heart and soul of what I do.

I am withdrawing from all that. I no longer read my stats. I no longer read all the articles about growing your blog. I don’t really care what my Google ranking is and you can’t make me care, so there.

The blog isn’t changing. My priorities about what is important for this blog have been clarified and strengthened. You are important to me. The quality of my content is important to me, but not because of a competition. Because of me. Because of you.

It’s awfully freeing.

Happy Wednesday.

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Filed Under: blogging, life 175 Comments

From My Heart: What I Believe

May 9, 2013 at 9:19 am by Claudia

elephants

The circus is in town. It was here last year at this time. I happened to be going back to the apartment on a break and saw the elephants walking down the street.

I took a picture (for this post) and then I had to get away from there. Quickly. The abuse of circus elephants has been well documented. You need only google that subject and a wealth of information will pop up. It makes me sick at heart. I never was a big fan of the circus, even as a child, but I certainly am not one now. Seeing these magnificent creatures being paraded down the street, away from their natural habitat, knowing what has been done to some of them, doesn’t bring me any joy.

If you’re a longtime reader of this blog, you have a good idea about my feelings on the subject of animal rights. I’m a vegetarian. I don’t eat meat, fowl or seafood. I first became a vegetarian as a way to support my brother as he chose a macrobiotic diet to fight the cancer that was invading his blood and bones. In the mid-eighties, I stopped eating red meat. I occasionally had chicken, turkey and seafood. But eventually, I developed a strong moral sense that, for me, eating any animal was wrong. I believe strongly in trusting my heart and my conscience. Those two always-truthful guides have told me that this is the right path. For me. There are many loved ones and friends in my life who don’t agree with me, who follow another path. That’s okay. I respect their right to their own journey. I work hard at quietly living my life as a vegetarian. If asked, I will explain the reasons for my beliefs. And I never apologize for them.

Here’s my truth: I don’t believe I am superior to any animal, any insect, any being. We are equal. In fact, in view of the horrors man has perpetrated, I would go so far as to say animals are a step or two above us. Animals have feelings, emotions and feel pain. It’s been proven. Though some people choose to take the Biblical words about man having dominion over animals to mean that we can shoot and eat them, I take those words to mean we are entrusted with their nurturing and care. We are here to help them, not abuse or kill them. Nor can I imagine raising an animal, nurturing it, even naming it and then killing it for food, especially in this 21st century when we have so many other sources for food.

I’m not always perfect. I make mistakes. I have more to learn. But I do my best. I’m phasing out my leather shoes. I no longer buy leather purses. I’m trying to live mindfully. It’s a continual challenge, but it’s a cause I believe in with all my heart and mind.

If I’m reading a decorating magazine or looking at a blog and I see an animal head mounted on the wall that’s considered a design element, I have to close my eyes and move on. Same thing with cowhide rugs or animal skins of any kind. It seems barbaric to me – like we have reverted back to some other, almost prehistoric time.

I realize that many will disagree with me. However, I have to live my life the way my conscience and soul guide me. And yes, I believe that animals have souls. How can I believe that God created all of this abundant, vibrant, beautiful life in its many forms, yet only gave man a soul? What makes me superior? Nothing.

I’ve heard all the arguments before: if we didn’t hunt deer, they would starve to death, we are humanely thinning the overpopulation of animals, some people have to hunt to eat, animals don’t have souls, we are going back to the land and raising our own sources of meat, cow hides make pretty rugs, the stuffed animal was already dead, I got the deer head at a flea market.

It doesn’t take much imagination to write a short story where humans are the prey. Where we are trying to live peacefully, are bothering no one, yet live in fear of being hunted. In fact, many have been written already. Some would argue that it happens every day in real life. It happened to a former student of mine who was peacefully walking down a street and killed in a drive-by shooting. The murderers were driving around, looking for prey. They were hunting. I will never get over it. When this tragedy happens to a fellow human, we are outraged, rightfully so. For me, the outrage is just as powerful and deeply felt when it happens to an animal.

Who speaks for them? We have to.

This is one of those times, my friends, that I feel compelled to write. Where, over the course of the last 24 hours, I haven’t been able to think of much else. When that happens, I have to write a post. My intention is not to preach – I really dislike preachy posts. My intention is simply to share my heart with you. You read a lot about my life here; I share so much with you. Not sharing this very, very important part of who I am with you seems less than truthful and I believe in being honest. I may lose readers over this post. I hope that isn’t the case. I hope you can respect my very heartfelt feelings on this subject. But, in the end, if I do, so be it.

You are welcome to share your thoughts, as always, but please be respectful. I say that because, though I know almost all of my readers are indeed respectful, I have been attacked before because of my beliefs – attacked in a very mean-spirited way. I assume you know that you can’t change my mind on this one. And I’m not trying to change yours. I’m simply sharing my own personal thoughts and beliefs on a subject matter that is very important to me.

Writing with love for all,

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Filed Under: animals, life, vegetarianism 90 Comments

Potpourri on Friday

May 3, 2013 at 9:11 am by Claudia

newmattress

• My second ‘unmade bed’ photo of the week. This from a girl who is a bedmaker. Like clockwork. But I show you this so that you can compare it to yesterday’s photo. Yes, the ugly mattress-turned-wallpaper is gone. I had a brief break during the day and came back to the apartment. Soon there was a knock on the door and it was the Company Manager, her assistant and a nice guy with a ladder. The guy with the ladder was there to rehang my curtain rod. Oh, didn’t I tell you? During my life as an I Love Lucy episode, I pulled on the curtains to close them and the rod came tumbling down, barely missing my head, the result of screws pulling out of the dry wall. They have now been secured with anchors. And the company manager didn’t mind at all that I had grabbed the other mattress. They moved the bad, cement-like mattress to the other apartment and then called my friend Bruce, who is an actor in the play. He likes a hard mattress. Indeed, he likes a hard mattress so much that he had been sleeping on the floor because he considered his mattress too soft. So he came upstairs, tried out the mattress and declared it just right. Into the elevator it went, on its way to Bruce’s apartment. See? Everybody is happy.

I slept much better last night. But then again, I was exhausted.

sneakers

• I hardly ever buy new clothes; we are on a tight budget. The two items I did buy before I left were a pair of sneakers and new jeans. Do you remember the jeans I bought that smelled musty? I washed those suckers countless times. I soaked them in vinegar. I hung them outside. They reminded me of the Seinfeld episode where Jerry can’t get the body odor smell (from a valet parking attendant) out of his car. The musty smell never left my jeans. It hung on for dear life.

I had to have a pair of jeans without holes in them, which is the pathetic state of most of my jean attire. I trotted off to Kohl’s. Don came along because I insisted that he assist me in a sniff test of all jeans I might be considering. So there we were, pulling out jeans in my size, sniffing them and putting them in a yay or nay pile. I’m sure we looked rather strange and somewhat questionable. Nevertheless, I discovered that Lee jeans seemed to have a musty smell and Levis did not. Levis passed the smell test. So, Levis it is.

And, in the continuing strange saga of getting older, my shoe size has changed. My feet are a half to a whole size larger than they were. Great. Just what I wanted. So, none of my shoes fit. Hence, the new pair of sneakers.

It’s a sad state of affairs when a non-musty pair of jeans and a new pair of sneakers are exciting.

• When did the words feminist or feminism become something bad? I have been reading a few posts around blogland that seem to be saying just that. Perhaps from a religious perspective? Is this something leftover from the days of bra burning? Something about women being subservient to men? Hmmm. So I looked up the dictionary definitions. As an adjective:

     Advocating social, political, legal and economic rights for women equal to those of men.

     The theory of the political, economic and social equality of the sexes.

As a noun:

     An advocate of such rights.

Sounds good and fair and right to me. There doesn’t seem to be anything outrageous in those words. Aren’t we supposed to have equal rights in this country of ours? Forget the use of the word men in the Constitution – that’s a product of the time in which it was written. Women couldn’t even exercise their right to vote then. Feminism is a positive thing. And I’ll take it even further: the equal rights of all our citizens are good and fair and right to me. I’m no more special than anyone else. Neither am I less than. Neither is anybody else. With all due respect to those of you that might disagree with me and I do respect you, I’m a proud feminist.

I have a feeling this could be a blog post in itself. Who knows what controversy I’m stirring up!

projects

• My future projects:

Finishing the hand quilting on that quilt and binding it.

Starting my new quilt with the fabrics on the top shelf, except for the bark cloth on the right – that’s for a pillow cover.

Okay. I’ve rambled on enough.

Happy Friday.

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Filed Under: life, On The Road, quilting 27 Comments

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Welcome!

Welcome!

I live in a little cottage in the country with my husband. It's a sweet place, sheltered by old trees and surrounded by gardens. The inside is full of the things we love. I love to write, I love my camera, I love creating, I love gardening. My decorating style is eclectic; full of vintage and a bit of whimsy.

I've worked in the theater for more years than I can count. I'm currently a voice, speech, dialect and text coach freelancing on Broadway, off Broadway, and in regional theater.

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