When Don and I decided to move in together, a little over a year after we first met, we knew we wanted to live in a house so that we could adopt a dog. Within a week of the actual move-in date, we were at the Humane Society. The first dog we saw was a black Aussie shepherd mix, who was trembling in his cage. Turns out that at the age of 18 months, he had just been given up for adoption by his family because of allergies. He was frightened and didn’t understand why he was no longer with his family. He broke my heart.
We went on to look at many other dogs that day, but that trembling boy kept tugging at our heart strings and we ended up back at his cage. We asked for some time with him in a special area set up for that sort of thing. They brought him to us and we knelt down and talked to him and petted him. I had placed my purse on the floor of the pen so that I could concentrate on petting him. He promptly went over and peed in it.
He marked his territory. Us.
We adopted him. He was named Winston and we liked that name. It suited him. We had to wait a day or two for him to get checked out by the Vets at the Humane Society and for them to take a fecal sample. We waited and waited. Why? Because he wouldn’t poop. Finally, they…ahem… ‘went in’ to get a sample. We brought him home and he promptly pooped in our backyard.
That boy marked us again. It was meant to be.
Here he is with the ball he would pick up and carry in his mouth each time he moved from one room to another. Lord, he was a beautiful boy. At one point, we almost lost him from an illness that was a baffling mystery for a long time. He lost weight. He threw up. He was weaker and weaker. Eventually, it was determined that his pancreas was not working and from that moment on he was on special medication for the rest of his life, medication that helped his pancreas to function. That medication brought our boy back to us.
We loved him deeply. We ended up getting Scout so he could have some company. And, when we decided to move from San Diego to New York, our babies moved with us across the country to our new rental cottage.
A couple of years after we moved out east, Winston suddenly cried out in pain. His tail stayed down. We took him to our Vet and during the course of an ultra sound, the Vet said he couldn’t hear a heart beat. He discovered that was because Winston had a tumor on his heart. Suddenly, we were talking about draining fluid from the lining of his heart, something that might keep him alive for six more months. He was eight years old. But that ended up being a wishful fantasy because within five days – in and out of the hospital – he was in so much pain that we knew we had to let him go.
I didn’t realize it until I came out of it, but I went into a mild depression for several months after Winston’s death. I had Scout to take care of and that helped keep me somewhat anchored. But the loss of our boy, so young, so suddenly, really took its toll on both of us.
I don’t mention him often on this blog, which was started a few years after his death. I found that photo the other day and I took a picture of it, so that I could share it with you. It’s also going on my sidebar.
This is the ornament we bought that first Christmas without him (photo taken last year.) Every year, it’s the last ornament we put on the tree.
This year, I realized I hadn’t found an ornament for our Riley and I felt tremendously guilty about that. It’s been over two years since his death. I bought one yesterday, which will serve as a place marker until I find the perfect ornament for our other beloved boy. And I will.
By the way, we adopted Scout when she was eleven months old – still a puppy. In those days she had short hair. She was our desert dog, having been rescued from a desert-like area of California.
I found a photograph of her yesterday. This is what she looked like.
I mean. Look at her! All eyes and ears. You see why we couldn’t resist her.
All of our dogs have been rescues. We strongly believe in that. They’ve all been older. Winston was 18 months old. Scout was just under a year old. Riley was at least two years old.
Our dogs aren’t ‘like’ our children. They are our children. Even if we had human children, that wouldn’t change.
Simple as that.
Scout will be celebrating her 16th birthday on January 4th. Oh yes, there will be a party.
This Christmas, and every Christmas, we remember our beloved Winston and Riley.
Happy Sunday.
I love that you shared Winston with us. What a beautiful dog he was. And that photo of Scout melts my heart. I just can’t imagine the pain of losing your dogs and hope that Scout lives to break all age records in dogs. Our Kane is heading into his 15th year. We adore him and find it is like living with a little old man now. We know where he is at all times and like us, he enjoys his meals more than ever. He still loves his walks albeit they are more like strolls now. Have a wonderful Christmas, Claudia. Deb
Bless your dear Kane, Deb. Scout takes strolls now, too, with the occasional gallop. I hope both Kane and Scout live for many more years.
Good morning Claudia. All I can say is I completely understand . I love my dogs too. Doris
I know you do, Doris. Thank you.
Such a sweet post! I love cats and dogs, but have always had cats. They really speak to me and are my furry children. I my first cat when I was around 10 and her name was Tiger (ironic) she stayed with my family and even endured quarantine to move to Hawaii with us. Sadly she lost her battle with kidney disease there. I had a few cats over the years but none that lived long…they got out, got lost, got hit by cars. My daughter is allergic so all animals had to be outside and cats just don’t live as long outside. After my daughter went to college, I got Charlie. He is as you know the love of my life. At 16 I can’t imagine what I will feel like when he is gone. Hopefully I have many more years with him. Memories of your sweet boys are so precious and I too pray that Dame Scout out lives them all!
hugs,
Linda
Does Charlie stay inside, Linda?
Yes, always has that is why he has been safe all these years. Outside cats do not live as long usually, too many predators out there.
I urge everyone, who can, to keep their cats indoors. Not only for the sake of the cats and their health and safety, but for the safety of songbirds, as well. Their population is decreasing and part of that is due to predators.
I’m so happy Charlie is living a long life, Linda!
Claudia, I do remember Riley, but not Winston. Scout’s been a good girl, hasn’t she? She has lost two brothers. Sad. Hope she doing well. Blessings for a pleasant day. We have sunshine today. xoxo,Susie
Lucky you! I’m afraid it’s pretty gray outside here today, Susie.
Thank you for sharing the picture of Winston – such a beautiful boy.
Our past pets have always been rescue animals – horse (that took some convincing at home), dog, cats (many). So sad that in this day and age there are still so many lost or abandoned animals looking for a safe home.
We recently had a “guest” in the shape of an enormous grey cat that my daughter found hanging around her dad’s warehouse. He was in pretty rough shape so we took him to our vet to have his tummy settled (he’d been living on a diet of twigs) and his teeth fixed. We called the animal shelter and placed an ad in the newspaper to no avail. We had become very fond of “Mr. Jones” and were prepared to offer him a permanent home when we got the call. He’d been (accidentally?) left behind when his owners moved. The woman who picked him up was completely uninterested in hearing about his plight and left without even a thank you to my daughter. Perhaps she was afraid that we were going to ask her for money. It was rather sad, but our door will always stay open.
How could he be left behind? Hmmm.
That’s when you wish that the call hadn’t come. You did a good thing for that sweet boy, Barbara.
He was quite a darling. I hope he feels safe and loved wherever he is.
I have all three of my 4 legged babies collars hanging on the back door. Dixie who was an older dog (Sheltie, Corgi) adopted from the shelter . Desiree (Chihuahua, Yorkie) we took in from a friend and Lucy (Dachshund) also taken in from a friend. I have empty nest doggie syndrome. I miss them all so much. I know how you feel they are our babies. I wish we could adopt another right now but the timing is not right. Love all your doggie pics. Hope you, Don and Scout have a wonderful day!
Hugs
The time does have to be right, Nancy. When it’s right, you’ll know. I have my boys’ collars, too.
I do have children, and there IS no difference in how much we can love our fur babies. You know we don’t have too long remaining w/ our one sweet Grey (only 9 yrs. old)…….. we do everything to keep her comfortable, and I hope and pray she makes it through the holidays. The other dog (who is her daughter!) is oblivious to what is going on, which is a good thing. Then there is the cat who is 15 yrs old. The only downside to having dear pets is knowing their life-span is always much too short. We have gone through this too many times in 42 yrs. of marriage! Each time I swear it is the last time…… and then, inevitably, another sweet one wanders into our life. And, we are always the better for it.
Thanks for sharing Winston’s story!!
I’m thinking of dear Grey, who is too young, and praying she makes it through Christmas. You and your family are in my thoughts, Chris. I know how hard this is.
I always say that God made one mistake. Our animals’ lives are too short. xo
Thank you for sharing Winston’s story and picture Claudia. What a beautiful dog he was. I had my Emma for 16 years (poodle/sheltie mix), and I definitely still miss her. I’d love to get another dog, but for the past several years I’ve lived where pets are not allowed :(
I hope you get to have another dog someday, Debbie!
That is a lovely tribute to your dogs. We have had 3 cats and 6 dogs during our marriage of 42 years and are down to 1 little Chihuahua, Candy, who will be 15 in May.
I can relate to the way you feel about your dogs, they are lifetime deal, just like human children.
BY THE WAY, all of our dogs are from animal rescue or shelter too.
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas to you, too, Carol Ann!
Wow, I can’t believe how much Winston looks like our first dog Duchess, who my parents got as a puppy a few months before I was born. She was the sweetest, most protective dog ever and would park herself directly under my carriage when Mom would put me aside for some air on sunny days, barking or growling the second anyone started up our front sidewalk. Of course she probably couldn’t do it today, but Mom always said she never worried a bit with Duch outside “on the job.” I was 16 when we lost her to old age, and it takes no time at all for me to become tearful thinking about her and what a lovey she was. It certainly will be a wonderful moment when we are ALL reunited someday…
Duchess sounds like a wonderful dog, Janet!
They were both beautiful dogs Claudia..I absolutely know what you mean by pets being your children..Winston’s ornament is so nice..such a sweet way to honor his memory..I’m sure you will find something nice for Riley too..
Fingers crossed, Nancy! We’re going to go out looking for one tomorrow.
This post made me smile and cry at the same time….sweet memories for sure. There is a special love we have with our pets. I feel like now, even though our boys are grown and gone, we have a toddler again…because our kitty is 18 months old….and quite the rabble-rouser! But, I wouldn’t have it any other way. So far he’s left the tree alone…but there aren’t any ornaments on it yet….fingers crossed! ;)
It will be interesting to see what he does when there are ornaments on the tree, Donnamae!
Beautiful post, Claudia. I love the photos of your babies. The ornaments that honor Winston and Riley are beautiful. Merry Christmas to you, Don, and Scout!
Christmas hugs to you all,
Donna
Merry Christmas to you and yours, Donna!
P.S. I also meant to comment on yesterday’s post. I love that you had a special visit with your mom!!!!!!!!!!!
Donna
Me too, Donna. It meant the world to me.
This post gave me a good Xmas cry for all the loved ones I’ve lost. We have cats with whom we share our lives because of severe allergies to dogs. Like you, there was always someone else who needed me after someone died…my children when my husband died; my cat, after her littermate died and she was confused why she no longer had a companion with whom to snuggle for long afternoon naps. Animals have a way of working their way into our hearts and letting go is so difficult. I’m glad you remember your sweet dogs in ways meaningful to you and your husband.
Letting go is unbelievably painful, Wendy. They are such a blessing and give so much to us.
Winston looks exactly (right down to the eyebrows) like our Sandy (named for Sandy Koufax of L.A. Dodgers fame) from my childhood! I was surprised at the resemblance–except for the span of years, he and Winston could have been twins! :^)
I so understand the loss you feel, it’s heartbreaking to lose your babies. I like to think that they’ve all crossed the Rainbow Bridge and are playing happily together.
Thank you for sharing and for bringing me some fond memories.
Judy B. in California
I hope they are having a ball, playing, running, and waiting to be reunited with us again.
Wonderful to have rescued three dogs.. there are so many out there in need of good homes like yours. Thank you for considering a shelter dog to add to your family – you are so right, they are indeed a family member, not just a “pet”.
I can’t see us doing anything other than adopting a shelter pet, Karen. It’s so rewarding.
What a lovely way to remember them Claudia.
We sadly had to let our cat go earlier this year and I think I will try to find a little white cat ornament to put on our Christmas tree.
Happy Christmas xxx
I’m so sorry to hear of the loss of your cat, Hayley.
Oh Claudia, thank you for sharing your memories, pictures and love for your special dogs. Our pets are such valued members of our families; when we lose them the loss is so painful. Seven years ago, we adopted a brother and sister from a cat rescue organization – already named Whitney (F) and Wilder (M). This fall dear Wilder became quite sick and was diagnosed with lymphoma. Within a few days of his dx, he became so very ill we had to make the final trip to the vet. When I wake in the middle of the night, I still reach for his soft body. However, his sister’s presence lessens the pain; she has become even more affectionate since his death.
Merry Christmas, Peace and Joy in the New Year.
Betsy in MA
I’m so sorry about dear Wilder. It is such a painful thing to lose a beloved family member. I’m glad you have Whitney to keep you company, Betsy.
Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful post!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you, Ruta.
I had heard over the years that to childless people, of whom I’m one, dogs and cats (or any domestic animal as a pet) are emotional replacements for children. Then, one day, I read an excellent article by an incredibly-fulfilled woman who had a big career and a bunch of kids, and she said she felt such a statement was hogwash…that her dogs weren’t replacements for anything or anybody but, more importantly, THEMSELVES as beings on this earth with their own rights to be what they are…and of course also her treasured friends, etc. (she gave a whole list of meanings).
My dogs and cats have most all been rescues of some sort and primarily mixed breeds. Most have been special needs; the ones to be thrown away. It can be a lot of work and money. My husband and I have grumbled over it more than once, not being saints (like, ‘how did we ever get into this in the first place…’). We didn’t start out with any plan to have rescues; it just kinda happened, and then it’s hard to stop once you know you can make a difference, and sometimes it doesn’t take a heckuva lot to make a difference. If you love animals, you just want to shield them and soothe them. And enjoy them! I also like the protection dogs, specifically, give me…better than a security alarm on the house.
We’ve adopted dogs as young as 9 weeks and as old as age 11. A few of the stories, I wouldn’t repeat because they would make anyone heartsick and stomach-sick. My wonderment about dogs and kitties (which are my experience, whereas other people might speak of pet bunnies or piglets, birds, etc.) is so much about their capacity to love, to forgive, to trust.
I so miss our little beagle, lost this past summer…prematurely, due to a back/spinal injury. We’d hoped to have her more years. It’s really been getting to me the past few days.
In 2007, my husband was walking our 2-year-old lab/shep who we’d raised since being weaned…unbelievably, we were already the third owner…and, in a perfect storm of events, my husband couldn’t retract the leash fast enough, the dog jumped at a moving car (which she had never done before) and the car was driving too fast (a driver who we believe was on a cell phone and not paying attention on a quiet, weekday morning in a sheltered residential neighborhood with mostly zero traffic at that time of day). Our healthy, young, big girl was fatally injured and died within the hour. It was a hard time; I had difficulty forgiving my husband, who had the ultimate responsibility, and he could not forgive himself. He, too, went into enough of a depression over it that he had to see a doctor and take antidepressant medication for about a year. You are not alone in your grief, Claudia.
Yours and Don’s beautiful dogs were and are so loved. It’s heartwarming. Savor the moments! We don’t get to keep them for very long but, oh, thank God for the time we do have with our pets. We get so much in return from them for the little they require from us. They just want to be our companions. How lucky to have a dog (or cat, or any of the rest of the lovelies) in our lives!
Now, I will sign off, realizing my comments as reader here are always too long, so I will work hard in 2015 to condense. It’s just that your wonderful blog strikes a chord in me, so many times and on lots of subjects. Thank you for the post. You are a terrific writer.
While I have been reading and enjoying your site for some time now, I have never commented before.
Your blog is one of the few I find I look forward to daily. Every post lends itself to real life, which is unique in the world of internet blogging.
Beginning with your beautiful cottage and dollhouse and working your way to your family, work, and photos, each post lends itself to a warm invitation to join your corner of the world.
Thank you for being such a genuine person. It has been my absolute pleasure to have found “Mockingbird Hill Cottage”.
May you and your family have a very Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year.
Thank you for telling us about Winston, Claudia. I hope that writing about him and Riley today has brought you some peace. You reminded me of a Will Rogers quote that I love: “If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.” Personally, I would change the noun to “pets.”
It’s all about the unconditional love, isn’t it?
It’s lovely that you remember your dogs in this way. We just have one dog – also from a rescue place. We’re not sure exactly how old she is but she’s at least 10.
Our pups give us such unconditional love and when we lose them we are lost. We, too, have had three rescues over the years. The first two were German Short Hair Pointers. Such sweet, sweet dogs, super hyper. Max died a year and a half ago in his bed. He was 15. We were heart broken. We have a new dog, nearing his first year with us. Hubby found him on line at a Vet clinic in Grant, NB, a teeny tiny twon 3 hours from us. He picked him from his photo. He was one of 13 in a litter, 5 of which were surrendered to the clinic because the owner couldn’t get rid of the last five. He is a handsome boy, a mix between short hair and (I will spell it wrong) a weimerniar. He is a hand full, big, strong, fast, hyper, and smart. We live on 5 acres so he has lots of running space. It is so hard not to miss our past dogs because they become our family, our little pet kids that keep us company, give us purpose, give us love. Merry Christmas, Claudia. I enjoy following you. See you next year.
Hi Claudia, I could not read any comments for fear of continuing to be “misty”. Thank you, though, for sharing about your babies. Winston looks a lot like my sisters dog, Abagail. (Who happened to get in an altercation with Miss Bella on Thanksgiving and my leg still has the marks!)
Some day I should tell you the story of when the first Bella left us March 2010.
Beautiful post Claudia, it made me cry because it brings back memories of the pets we have lost, they always keep a special place in our heart.
Thank you for this post, Claudia. I needed it. I’ve been reading the blog faithfully for the last month, but I haven’t been inclined to comment…I’ve been in a funk. (A very happy belated birthday, by the way.) On November 20th, we had to put our beloved Catahoula ‘Foster’ down. He was eleven and a half. In April he had a tumor removed from inside his ear, and our vet suspected cancer, but he thought he got it all. Foster had a wonderful few months, and then started to go downhill dramatically. I’ve been staring at a beautiful, empty blue ceramic water dish for several weeks, and thinking of you and Riley. We hung pet ornaments as well, but it wasn’t easy…you smile through the tears. Merry Christmas to you, Don, and Scout.