Source: Wikipedia, Irish Setter from 1915, W. E. Mason, Dogs of all Nations
My friends, I’ve been very blue this weekend as I contemplate the deterioration of my mother’s already fragile health and listen to my dad cry out his heartbreak during our phone calls. I feel as if I’m on the edge of a precipice of loss. When it will happen, I cannot know, but that feeling lurks in every corner of my daily life.
So often lately, I choose to remember my parents as they were decades ago. In my head I see a photo of us together in San Diego (I’ll have to share it with you someday), that first summer I lived there, just weeks before I met Don for the first time. Big smiles, still vital – happy to be with me in my new city. Or I picture my mom and I laughing over something or other. We laughed a lot together; we’d laugh so hard that we’d clutch our stomachs, tears in our eyes. Laughter is the best medicine.
With that in mind, I thought I’d share a funny story with you. A true story. When I was a teenager, we had an Irish Setter named Shannon. Shannon was smart as a whip and constantly into something or other. Oh, he was a handful, but how he would make us laugh! He’d grab a dish cloth or a hand towel and run through the living room with it in his mouth, hoping to get our attention. If one of us purposely ignored him, he would reverse direction and run back through the room, dish cloth still in his mouth. This would go on and on until, exasperated, he would finally just drop the cloth in our lap as if to say, See? I took it. Doesn’t anyone care???
My dad wore dentures. He would sometimes leave them on the sink in the bathroom when he went to bed. One morning, my mom was in the living room (dad was still sleeping) and Shannon tore by her with something in his mouth. Then he tore by her again. She glanced up. Not a dish cloth. Something she couldn’t see was hidden in his mouth. She called out his name – Shannon! He did what he always did when he had something he didn’t want us to get from him. He went under the dining room table – just far enough to make it hard to reach him. By this time, Mom had asked for my help. We got down on our hands and knees and reached for him – he moved his head away from us. We reached again. He moved away. Finally, Mom got hold of his collar. Then we tried to pry his mouth open. When we pried his teeth apart, we saw anotherset of teeth – my dad’s.Oh no.
In a panic, all we could think was that my dad would completely lose it if Shannon chomped on his expensive dentures. And he would have. As I kept his mouth open, Mom, with the skill of a surgeon, began to remove the dentures from his mouth – praying the whole time that he wouldn’t bite down on them. Somehow we did it. Adrenalin-infused strength, I bet.
Afterwards, she took those dentures, scrubbed the life out of them, used some denture cleaner and put them back where they had been – on the side of the bathroom sink. She knew she couldn’t tell my father about it. I was sworn to secrecy and dad didn’t find out about it until many years later. For years, mom, my sisters and I would tell that story and laugh our heads off.Shannon was always up to something. We had a travel trailer parked in our driveway (right outside my parents’ bedroom window) and many was the time that mom and I would be out there on our hands and knees, one on either side of the trailer, trying to get Shannon to come out from under it. He would invariably lay there, right in the place where we couldn’t reach him, taunting us. We’d do this in whispers, trying not to disturb my dad (sleeping again) or our neighbors. After what seemed like hours of this rigamarole (confident that my dad was still sleeping) one loud bellow of Shannon! from the direction of the bedroom would bring him out from under the trailer and into the house, making Mom and me, on our hands and knees, look ridiculous.
All these years later, those stories still make me laugh. And that’s a good thing.
Claudia, When I was young, I always said I was going to have an Irish setter…cause they were red and my hair was too. More auburn. It is sad what you are feeling in your heart, about the ill health of your mother. Hug them and love them while you can. xo, Susie(She Junks)
How wonderful to be able to look back and remember those stories and laugh…and remember our parents as they once were. It is so hard, and sad, to see our parents weaken before our eyes-long before we are ready for it.
I lost my father at 21-he was an old Dad when I was born-53 and I was his first child. He had Parkinsons that took him away in an 11 year span. I lost my Mom when I was 35 to Alzheimers…another awful disease. I so understand what you are going through. God bless you and just keep remembering the good times as you can.
Love the dog story. They are so smart, aren’t they? xo Diana
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When I was very young, and had three toddlers, we bought an Irish Setter puppy and named him Shannon! He was beautiful, smart, and ornery. He chewed everything he could get his teeth on, including toys, books, shoes. He loved to collect things, and would go around the neighborhood, picking up newspapers, boots, once a throw rug, and would carry them home, and proudly deposit them at our doorstep. The neighbors would call and ask if Shannon had their newspaper, and anything else that was missing! It was very embarrassing. Finally, we decided with three little children, he was more than we could handle. We gave him to a nice young couple who lived on a farm. We called a few weeks later to see how he was doing. They said he was great, but he had eaten their sofa!
I had Irish Setters from the time I was 11 years old until I was 20 and they are my favorite breed.
Loved your “denture” story!
nancyr
It is nice to have these fun memories to think about at times like this. We are all going to go through it if we haven’t already~losing our parents. But I enjoyed this story very much!
Wonderful memories and happy laughter help to heal. I know what you are going through as I lost my Dad about 5 years ago. I miss him everyday but the memories are with me always. Sending you a big hug! linda
Good morning Claudia, what a wonderful story about your old dog and his past adventures with you and your parents. I’m sorry to read about your Mom’s health and your fathers ‘pain’..this is a tough time in our lives as our parents age. For them and for us. Thank heaven’s for wonderful happy memories such as yours. Enjoy the good days with them as these will be happy memories as time goes on.
I bet Shannon had an exceptionally beautiful smile that day! Thank goodness for our dogs… Hagrid makes me laugh every day with all his shenanigans.
Hugs,
Jill
Aren’t the old classic family tales the things that keep us going due these challenging times. I too feel as if I’m on the precipice of many of the same changes. In fact, that’s the perfect word for it. I think I’ll enrich my vocabulary today and add it to my daily arsenal. My thought will continue to be with you, Mere and the rest.
What fabulous memories, Claudia. I hope they comfort you in these dark days.
Sue
xo
Writing these memories down is so good for you and it is so sweet of you to share them with us. In the hard times now and to come I hope they continue to comfort you. I have been writing some very hard memories of my childhood and Joe feels they should never be posted. Maybe not.
I find little things will trigger that kind of memory and let me spend a while back with those I’ve loved and lost. It doesn’t make me sad, rather I find I’m smiling. ~ Maureen
Oh Claudia, I DO know exactly the pain you are feeling and I pray for peace (for you AND your daddy!)
Time marches on and you are SO wise to remember the happy things. Big hugs to you (and for your WHOLE family!)
Mare
Remind me to tell you some time about the day one of the whippets was found in the garden with one of my bras on his head … he didn’t want to be caught either!
Old family stories are good things to have and good things to share :D
I’ll be thinking of you all x
What a wonderful story! Memories like this will help. I lost my dad 5 1/2 years ago. Never easy. Keep the memories alive as they will make you smile in these hard times.
It is a good thing. I know you are sad, my dear friend. And I am too far away to reach out and hold your hand. Keep these memories at the forefront as much as you can. It’s really all you can do. I know you feel helpless. Life gives us gifts and then takes them away. As my dear friend Charlyce always told me: Tie another knot in your rope and just hang on. I’m a call away if you need me.
Love you, Brenda
They make me laugh too, and I remember that day so well.
Love you,
Mere
A virtual hug from me, Claudia. I know how you feel. I’ve lost my father and watch my mother age every day. Hold on to your wonderful memories as they are the best comfort you will find.
Pets add such joy to our lives, and levity when we seem to need it most. How loyal of Shannon that his memory still cheers you.
The best part is that you DO have wonderful memories, and the laughter will always be there inside your heart.
It’s so hard when the time does come and they leave us, and of course it’s something we cannot change. Fortunately those beautiful memories stay behind. They keep us moving on in a different way, but at least we have them and the happier they are, like your special ones here, the luckier for us left behind.
My prayers are with both your parents and all your family Claudia.
Love, Mary
Hi Claudia! I’m so sorry that you’re experiencing so much sorrow regarding the situation with your parents. It can be so painful when our loved ones hurt! Your stories of your dog are so funny. He must have been so much fun! I love Irish Setters. They’re beautiful dogs.
Casey has recently introduced her followers to the beautiful art of Zentangle. I’m sure you must have seen the intriguing ones she is doing on her blog. She is doing a ton of them for her printer’s tray. May I suggest that you try your hand at doing one or two today. It would take your mind off the problems at hand, it would refresh you and relax you. I’m sure of that. Here is a flicker link that contains tons of them. http://www.flickr.com/groups/zentangle/pool/ Or, if you prefer, you can go to Casey’s site and link directly. She also has another link by the people who invented zentangling. Just try it, okay! It can’t hurt.
I am so sorry Claudia. It is hard to see our parents age and go downhill. My husband and I lost our fathers 3 months apart.
Love your stories about your dog. I will say some prayers for you and your family.
(((((HUGS))))
I can only offer some virtual hugs to you as many as you need for I am experiencing that loss of my Grandfather who had always been there for me as the father figure. He has been gone from this Earth for the past two years but not from my heart. Many memories have been flooding through my mine… especially this time of the year. grandpa and I shared our birthdays together even-though they’re two days apart.Hold onto to those memories… they are scrapbooks of our lives! Give your Mom and Dad some hugs from me.
Memories are such wonderful things that stay with us forever. It’s hard to lose a parent – my mother died 17 years ago. My heart goes out to you, but stay strong and keep those memories close to your heart.
Dear Claudia, I know your heart is breaking, it’s so difficult to lose them, to see their vitality slip away. My mother had the best sense of humor, she and I once got into a pillow fight in Kresge’s and we were laughing and giggling so hard, we decided we best slip out of the store before somebody thought it was for real! It’s those precious memories that wills sustain you. Annette T
A “delightful” post Claudia ~ what a funny story told with your usual flair. We had a pair of setters (Kelly and Kennedy) and three huge litters of pups.
Hugs to you ~ this is a hard time ):
Those happy memories will keep you strong Claudia. This is a hard time, I know. Ann
During the times when we have loved ones who are getting more fragile, it is sure so nice to have those fun memories! What precious memories! :)
Those good times will help you make it through these difficult times. I’ve been where you are now, it’s the hardest thing you’ll ever go through, but you will get through it. Sending virtual hugs and prayers your way!
Dogs! Love them!! What wonderful memories. My step dad lost both his parents in two months. He has had a time of it. One sudden, one not. Neither easy. Hold on to the good. It is all we have sometimes and it is good.
Hugs, Lisa
Love the tea towel story!!
Molly has a thing for tea towels- whenever one of us comes home- she frantically runs round the kitchen trying to find one to bring us.One day when we had a massive pile of dishes drying on top of a tea towel on the worktop, she performed a ‘table cloth trick’ tugging it out from underneath all the dishes without dropping any!!
The first thing she does upon entering the in-laws house is to grab a tea towel and bring it to us.She loves them. Lots of love xx
What a fabbytastic story I can just see your smiley shannon :)
Sending big virtual hugs to you,and here’s hoping that you manage to hold on tight to all your fun memories
I’m a new follower to your blog,will pop back to see how youre doing
XX Manda XX
I have lost both of my parents, and family stories such as this one about Shannon, really do bring comfort. I will keep good thoughts for your Mom and Dad, and for You.
Having lost both my folks many years ago, all I can say is it is hard..very hard..but we carry on and we continue sharing the love they gave us..I find comfort in that.
xx
z
So Sorry to hear your Mom is ill. The memories are there to help us I think, and you have some very funny ones!
THAT IS SO FUNNY……ANIMALS ARE GREAT…….AND I HAD MANY IN MY LIFETIME…..I HAD AN IRISH SETTER NAMED DOC….HE WAS SO LOVABLE……
SO WHEN I GOT MARRIED I GOT AN IRISH SETTER…NAMED HER KELLY……SHE KNOCKED MY CHRISTMAS TREE DOWN…BROKE ANTIQUE BALLS MY MOM GAVE ME, AND MY NEW TWO GLOBE LAMP….BUT YOU GOTTA LOVE THEM…..PRAYERS WILL BE SAID FOR YOUR MOM…AND YOUR DAD…..RIZZI
You made me think of our Irish Setter, Shamrock Kelly Red..or Kelly.
She was a hoot, really smart but oh my the stories we can tell!! It must be an Irish Setter trait.
I will be praying for you and your family and know that you are in my thoughts.
So sorry to hear about your mom, Claudia. I lost my dad 15 years ago after a long battle with MS and even though I thought I was prepared, it still seemed like a terrible shock. Having wonderful memories is so important. I love your stories about your dog.
Hugs,
Laura
Hold on to those memories Claudia…they will get you through this sad time. I am thinking of you. ~Hugs, Patti
My mother and I still laugh about the time she was helping me move. We each had an armful of clothes, still on the hangars, as we slowly made our way down three flights of stairs. She started to lose her grip on the clothes and then began to fall (in slow motion) from the sheer weight of them. I started laughing and then started to fall slowly down the stairs too, until we were both lying in a heap at the bend in the stairs, buried in all the clothes.
As for naughty dogs: when our relatives would visit each summer from out of town, we’d all meet at my mother’s for a picnic. She had just put all the platters out on the porch when my uncle (who was southern and spoke with a very slow, gentlemanly drawl) looked out the window and said, matter of factly, “Should the dog be eating all that ham…?” Needles to say every woman in the kitchen screamed and ran to the porch to save what we could of our dinner.
Memories and laughter are the best way to keep our loved ones with us.
I love the Shannon story – I know that look on their face when they have something in their mouth that they don’t want you to see/take – and such strong jaws when you try to pry the jaws open! Thinking of you as you deal with your family sorrows – my mom has been gone 6 years.
Also, I wanted to let you know I’m having my first giveaway to celebrate my publication in apronology mag.
http://houseofbeautifuldogs.blogspot.com/2012/02/fancy-apron-giveaway.html
Stay strong, Love, Linda
I’m so sorry about your mom and all the sadness you’re feeling, Claudia. Thanks for a great story and for helping us all laugh. You’re a bright star! :-) Jennifer