As we celebrate Thanksgiving this week, I thought I’d share something that Don and I discussed the other day. I’ve got a birthday coming up, we just celebrated our anniversary, the year is drawing to an end. Getting older gives us some much needed perspective, an opportunity to look back and see our lives and the paths we chose, how circumstances drew us to someone or something, how we were guided – by angels in the form of strangers or loved ones, by divine guidance, by a gut feeling.
I see this in my own story.
After college (major in Drama and Speech with a teaching certificate) I was clueless as to what I wanted to do. There were too many teachers and no one was hiring. Truth be told, I wasn’t sure I really wanted to teach secondary school. So I moved back home, hung out with my dear friend Jackie, and worked a variety of jobs: substitute teacher, receptionist for a private club, and then as a customer service rep for a company making biological media and reagents. That particular job was one I held for seven years. Seven years. I am not a scientist. I couldn’t care less about microbiology. I did love the people I worked with and I acted in plays on the side. I never stopped acting. But I spent 40 hours a week in a job I didn’t like. Fast forward to turning 30, which was quite traumatic for me because I felt like I was stuck in Detroit and had no way out. Because my dad was drinking at the time, I felt a need to stay around, in part, for my sisters, who were much younger than me. Angels, in the form of two dear friends, sat down with me and told me it was time for me to think of myself, time for me to make a change and pursue my passion, which was theater. They were right. I took their advice, auditioned for graduate school, was accepted and moved to Philadelphia. Loving friends and angels in human form.
Graduate school changed everything. I was happier. I was living in a new city. I loved Philadelphia. And without my MFA, everything that happened afterward simply wouldn’t have happened. After getting my degree, I made the decision that I wanted to teach on a university level. I was still in Philly doing temp work and acting at the Wilma Theater on the side. But I was very, very poor and couldn’t afford a subscription to a publication called ArtSearch, which lists job openings in education/performing arts. Another angel, in the form of my friend Richard, who was a classmate and, by now, working as a professional costume designer, appeared. He gave me a subscription for a Christmas present. Because of that subscription, I applied for several positions, including one at North Carolina School of the Arts. I was a finalist, flew down for an interview and, though I was not at all the kind of person who thought this way, came out of that interview and subsequent talks with the faculty absolutely sure I would get the job.
I didn’t. On Memorial Day weekend when Meredith was visiting me, I received a thin envelope from the school and knew immediately that I didn’t get the job. I was devastated. Ask Meredith. I cried all weekend, knowing that I now had to wait another year for the opportunity to apply for teaching jobs. I felt trapped. Stuck.
Side note: One of my temp jobs was with a company in town that dealt with the sciences (what’s up with me and science?) and my boss, who was a kind man, offered me the position on a permanent basis. He already knew I was looking for a teaching job so I said I wouldn’t feel right hiring in full time. He said he knew that and whenever I wanted to leave he would understand, but why not have health insurance in the meantime? Another angel.
Anyway, about a week after that devastating weekend, I was walking home from work and I started talking out loud. I looked up at the sky and said, “God, I don’t know what to do. I don’t know where to go from here. I’m at the end of my rope. I surrender.” I was crying all the way home. I felt as low as I had in a long, long time. When I walked into my apartment, the message light was blinking on my answering machine. There was a message from the Chairman of the Theater Department at Boston University, telling me they had a sudden job opening in Voice and Speech and that he had called some colleagues, one of them being North Carolina School of the Arts, and they had recommended me. Out of the blue. I flew up, interviewed, got the job, moved to Boston. Divine Guidance in the form of an answer to a prayer. I wouldn’t have got the job without the experience in North Carolina. And Boston was a much better fit for me. I worked with a mentor who guided me through the first year of teaching. I am forever grateful to him. I loved every minute of my time there, learned so much, got professional coaching experience at the Huntington Theater Company and the North Shore Music Theater. And I met Rick there.
After five years at BU, I was ready for a change. My brother had just died. I was facing 40. I was underpaid. I said out loud, several times: I want to teach on a graduate school level and coach at a major regional theater. One day, Rick (another angel) came into my office to tell me about a voice position that was opening up at the University of San Diego/Old Globe Theater. He knew about it because he was applying for the Head of the Acting program. The job was exactly what I had said out loud: teaching in a grad program and coaching at the Old Globe, a major regional theater.
I never for a minute thought that they would hire both of us. I flew out for the job interview (my first time in California.) While I was there, I watched a matinee of a production my friend Kathy (who had guest taught at BU) was in and there was a guy in the cast who intrigued me. Very talented. Tall. I remember looking at his photo in the program, thinking he looked interesting. But I promptly forgot about him as I flew back home and then found out I had the job. And then, that Rick had been hired as well.
The move to California led to my life today. I worked in a terrific program with talented students. I coached at the theater, working with all sorts of professional actors and directors, some of them quite famous. I learned more and more about Shakespeare, as it was a staple at the Globe.
After my first year of teaching, I was coaching an Irish play by Brian Friel as part of the summer season. And, after years of avoiding commitment, I had a moment of surrender one day. I asked to find another way, to release old patterns of behavior, to open myself up to the possibility of a healthy relationship. Two weeks later, at a meeting of all the actors and staff for the summer season, I saw a guy sitting across the aisle from me. He looked familiar. When his name was announced by Jack O’Brien as a new Associate Artist, I recognized it. Don Sparks – the guy I’d seen in that play a year before. He wasn’t in the play I was coaching, but in a week or so I met him at a Fourth of July party hosted by our friend Kathy. Turns out he was just as ready as I to change previous patterns and the rest is history. Another surrender, another prayer answered.
After 8 years there, both Don and I felt guided to move to the East Coast, so we packed up and moved everything, including our two dogs. We both said we wanted to work on Broadway. Within a few years, we did. Guidance, connections, being in the right place at the right time – all of it led to those jobs.
Years later, when I went back to the Globe to coach the Shakespeare Repertory, I met Darko. We clicked. That led, eventually, to seven years of work at Hartford Stage and to another Broadway show, Anastasia.
Don’s life has been much the same, but that’s his story to tell.
By the way, he was playing Malvolio in Twelfth Night when we met. And he hadn’t expected to be there. He was doing a play in Phoenix that would be closing in a couple of weeks and, on a whim one day – but we know otherwise, don’t we? – called the casting person at the Globe to see if there might be anything interesting for him in an upcoming show. She exclaimed that his timing was perfect. The guy who had been cast as Malvolio had to turn it down at the last minute and could Don do it? So he hopped on a plane and there he was. Ready for me to meet. On that day and at that time. I absolutely know we were brought together by a greater plan than we could have ever devised.
And now, after being on opposite sides of the country for 16 years, Rick is here with his husband, Doug. In what might seem a fluke, but isn’t, they live six minutes from our cottage.
I might draw some sort of flow chart someday. The whole thing amazes me. And it happens to everyone in some way or form. I’m not special. I’m just aware and grateful.
I know this has been a long post, but I am so, so grateful for all the connections, the ideas seemingly coming out of nowhere, the prayers answered, the days I felt so low that I had no choice but to surrender, which was the exact thing I needed to do, the divine intelligence that saw an answer to a situation I felt was hopeless, that drew me to Philadelphia and Boston and San Diego and the East Coast, that brought me my husband and my career and my dear dogs and my cottage. That helped us find answers when our financial struggles seemed overwhelming: the check out of nowhere, the friends who helped us, the jobs that came just when we needed them, and the sense of humor that saved us from despair countless times.
All of this is to say that I am thankful. And I’m grateful, also, to be able to see the big picture. To see it from a respectable distance and marvel at the miracles that have been right there all the time.
Happy Tuesday.
Contentment and to be grateful that is what God wants for us
I really believe it is not in material buying
That will never make you happy
Maybe for a day
Reach out to others try to see their pain
Life isn’t easy, but interesting. I wish you all the best for the years to come! Regula
Thank you for sharing your story with us. Sometimes it is only in hindsight that you see the crossing of paths and the way it all came together. The downs and the ups and the important things that truly matter friends, family and relationships.
I found this very interesting. Putting life into perspective can be difficult. Thanks for sharing.
How lovely to be able to look at your life and see God’s plan. I look back on mine and even with my ‘mis-steps’ I know I’m where God wants me. I continue to feel blessed with my life even with it’s hardships. As the saying goes, What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. You lovely life story is another blessing and meeting you (and Don) through blogging has been a big blessing in my life. Happy Thanksgiving!
Thanks Claudia for sharing your story. You made me reflect on all the people who were there for me when I was at a crossroad. I realize now that the good times far outweighed the bad. Difficult times give us the opportunity to grow and in the end hopefully to feel a sense of pride in how far we have come. It’s funny how we can feel a connection to people we have never met in person. Through your blog you allow us to realize how much we all have in common. Thanks for that as it’s good to feel a connection in this devisive world. I hope you and Don have a very happy thanksgiving.
WOW, such an interesting story! Thank you for sharing that with us. A Happy Thanksgiving to you and Don.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I am so happy to have found your blog many years ago because it makes me feel like we’ve been friends forever even though we have never met in person.
I wish a blessed Thanksgiving to both you and Don.
wow, claudia, wow! this is easily my most favorite post from you ever (and i like them all … you have a gift with speaking from your heart)! what a blessing when we can look back at our lives and find clarity and gratitude (even for the hard times) … and give credit to people, yes, but mostly to God for helping meet our needs and wishes. amen!
and you made me cry. :)
thanks for sharing.
hope you and don will have a wonderful thanksgiving (and no more snow for a good long while)!
kathy in iowa
Thank you for sharing your remarkable story, Claudia. Blessings to you and Don on this Thanksgiving celebration~
I always tell my kids, my husband and my friends that “it is written in the stars”. Things will happen when the Universe is ready, but they will happen. Looking ahead is always, for me at least, a hard thing to do. I see all of the reasons of “why not”. Looking back and seeing what I have learned, and how and why things happen/ happened is always much more rewarding and enlightening for me. It also gives me faith in knowing that what is ahead will also work out. I think we all need to do an annual review of where we are in life and how we got there. It is sort of amazing!
Your journey is a fascinating one and all yours! And regardless of mis-steps and the ever present bumps and bruises of everyday living, we make it!! And those bumps and bruises and wrinkles and creases tell our story. Thanks so much for sharing your story with us. It should make us all think about our own story and for what we are thankful. I am also thankful for you and having coffee with you every day. ♡
Claudia, you have the open mind that enables you to see the things for which you should be thankful, the ability to embrace that thankfulness and pay it forward, and the willingness to continue striving. It’s really a very satisfying circle that you’ve built around which you live your life!
I have heard bits and pieces of your story but it was nice to have it all together. Life is interesting.
Loved this post. My hubby and I had a conversation about this same topic the other night. The things that happened in our lives that led to our meeting and the things since that have led to where we are very happily living out our retirement years…truly Devine Intervention.
Lovely story, lovely life. We all have much to be thankful for, if we take the time to think about it, don’t we? Thanks for sharing. May your blessings just keep on coming.
Thank you for writing your life story, it is beautiful. I believe God winks at you a lot.
Have a wonderful and happy Thanksgiving.
It’s true – every life is a story. And this is a terrific one. You’ve written your own autobiography here, just the Readers’ Digest edition of it. Imagine how good the full-length version would be! Thanks for taking the time to do it. Very appropriate this week too, as we reflect on what we’re grateful for. PS – not too long at all. I found myself wishing there was much more. Peace. ✨
#Resist
#ProtectMueller
Claudia, thank you so much for sharing your story. I hope you and Don have a wonderful Thansgiving holiday.
Claudia – isn’t it amazing what the Lord can do when we let Him? I’m always making plans when I should just let Him handle everything since He already does anyway. LOL Your story is such a true love and career story that I loved hearing. Your birthday present will be late since I just got your address, OK?
Have a very happy and blessed Thanksgiving!!
Love ya,
Judy
I do this, often, myself … looking back, and marveling, at the hand of God in my life. What a beautiful post, Claudia.
Couldn’t be a more perfect story, even with the detours. Especially the detours, because they make us appreciate all the more when the road is smooth and reminds us that twists and turns can bring us exactly to where we need to be. May blessings continue for Don and you, and for all of us!
Dear Claudia, Thank You for taking the time to share that story with us.
I find it interesting, endearing, (both you and Don)and inspirational.
A True Love Story. Judy A-
Claudia, I am going through a really difficult time right now and do not see how I can feel any lower than I do. I cannot put into words how your post touched me today, Thank you for sharing your story.
hi, susan.
i hope the hard time is over, that you have things to do for fun and help if you need it. i hope you have plenty of time with family and friends as well as to rest. i hope your basic needs and more are met. that is what i will pray for you.
kathy in iowa
What an interesting life you have. Wishing you and Don a Blessed Thanksgiving.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING
Marilyn
So appreciate your sharing your life story with us. It was interesting to read about your career and about all the places you’ve lived. Being about the same age as you, I also sometimes look back and try to make sense of my life choices and where I’ve been and reflecting on the paths I took to get where I am today.
At 30, I had just transferred to a new position at the university where I worked. I was certain I wouldn’t be there long, that I needed to move on. I’d also given up on finding “the one” and, since my brother and his wife had started a family was no longer under pressure from mom to make her a grandma. What a relief! I could relax and live my life the way I wanted. My first morning on this new job, a good looking guy in a fedora came through the door. Seems he’d just returned from an internship on the East Coast to finish his MBA and was now a graduate assistant in the suite where I worked. Within a month we were dating. Nine months later, he moved to DC to began his new job at the NEA and I soon joined him there. Two years later, we married. During this wild journey of our life together, we’ve lived different places, had interesting jobs and I’ve often reflected during these 35 years on what would have happened had I not decided to make a career move, take that new job. After all, he’d already been on campus long enough to only have a semester of grad school left and we hadn’t met. Well, I loved hearing about your choices. It’s good to reach this point in our lives and be a peace with our life’s directions.
I really love this post, Claudia. Partly because it helps me know you better. (Are you a Michigan woman too? I was an MSU theatre major in the ’70s.) And to appreciate that others, like you, understand how “things work out.” Even when they seem they never might do so. And how those serendipitous happenings seem to be a little more than just coincidences.
I suspect many of us “have a story.” I have a career story and a love story and both didn’t really happen as I ever expected they might. And like you, I am grateful, so very grateful, for all that occurred somewhere in the universe to bring things together.
Your story is lovely and I can see why you feel so very blessed. I wish you great joy and love this Thanksgiving (but I think you already have it!)
Oh, Claudia! What a lovely life story. And it is true; I can look back on my life now and see how God’s Hand was in it all — even the hard times when I was sure there was no hope. Blessings to you and Don this Thanksgiving.
Wow. Wow. May you two have a Happy Thanksgiving. My life has been nothing like yours. Mine has been mundane and not very interesting, but I am truly grateful for all that I have been given.
It is just wonderful when everything falls into place! Thanks for sharing this, it was a joy to read about your journey. x
That is certainly a wonderful story Claudia..no this doesn’t happen for everyone…but I am so glad it happened for you…
I am way way WAY behind on reading your blog. For no good reason but perhaps subconsciously I needed to read this today.
Thank you for sharing your story. It’s reminded me that I need to trust God (aka the Divine) more. So thank you!
Thank you, Leanne.
Oh, but you are special!–so very.very special!!!
Thank you, Jane!