(the flowers came home with me)
Do you ever find this happening? You go away, perhaps stay in a hotel or a cottage – someplace that doesn’t hold all your belongings but is a temporary space – and when you return to your home you think: There’s too much stuff in this house! That happens to me every time I return home from a coaching job.
Of course, when I’m staying in temporary housing, I only have a few of my belongings with me. And that’s fine – for a while. The contrast between the relative spareness of temporary housing and a cottage full of furniture, knick-knacks, books, appliances…stuff, is most glaring when I first walk in the door. I want to purge everything. But a few days pass and, while I know I need to sort through some things, I am once again happy to be surrounded by my stuff.
We have a lot of stuff.
But all of it has a story. All of it speaks to our loves: collecting, vintage, reading, music, inherited pieces, texture, nature, color. If someone else was writing this, the overused and trendy ‘curated’ might be used. I won’t use that word because a curator is something other than a person who displays and arranges things in her/his home. That takes a word which describes a job that is earned through training and education and experience and turns it into something less than. Now,’curate’ will never have the same weight, the same heft. I wonder what actual Curators think of the fact that everyone is suddenly ‘curating’ their home or ‘curating’ some furniture or clothing from a website? When did we all get to be curators?
I digress. Don’t get me started on ‘awesome.’
(Riley’s Dish Garden)
I might as well accept the fact that I like my things around me and there will always be an overabundance of things – let’s change that word to treasures – in this little cottage. Am I going to get rid of my books? Only the small amount that I donate to the library every year. Am I going to get rid of my china, my pottery, my collections? Perish the thought. What about furniture? Need all of it. The pieces we decided we didn’t need have all been sold through Craig’s List. The piano, which, let’s face it, takes up a lot of space? No and no and no. It was my grandmother’s. My mother, my aunt, my brother and my sisters touched those keys. It’s priceless.
I admire all those photos of spare rooms with just a few carefully chosen decorative elements added. I like looking at them. I wonder, though, how anyone can exist for a long period of time in that kind of space. They do, of course. But for me, that very spareness would eventually strangle me and propel me to a flea market where I would be found frantically searching for some egg cups, or some china, or a jumping jack or two. Some treasures.
Heck, after a few days there, I was sitting in my apartment in Hartford thinking of how I would decorate it if it were mine. I was mentally hanging quilts on the walls and thinking about how I would get all my stuff in there.
(the feather I found in Hartford has joined our display of found treasures)
Living in a ‘curated’ space would not suit me. Yes, there has to be some order; some arranging must be done, otherwise all the eye will see is a jumble, a chaotic mess. Most of us love doing that kind of thing. Do I dare mention at this point that I’m getting tired of the word ‘vignette?’ I’ll have to put my thinking cap on and see if I can think of a new word to describe such arrangements. Presentation? Display? Array?
Curating a collection of paintings in an art museum makes sense to me. ‘Curating’ the things I love does not.
What about you? Are you able to thrive in a spare environment? Do you crave that sort of order? Or do you like your stuff treasures surrounding you?
Happy Wednesday.
Claudia, How about display? or scene? Thats all it has ever been to me, an extremely simple Country girl. When I first started reading about “Vignette” I thought it was about salad dressing! -Judy A-
Funny, Judy!
I am all for getting rid of the word vignette :-)
Have a great day surrounded by your treasures.
Perhaps we should start a movement?
Claudia I have to be surrounded by things! I need the visual stimulus and the memories and the fun of it all! While I admit to having too much stuff and needing to down size some I will never be sparse…oh perish the thought!
hugs,
Linda
Me too, Linda!
I think when we feather our nests it’s a way of surrounding ourselves with the things we love. It makes a house a home. I do the same, and I dont regret it.
I don’t either, Karen!
I know, every time I think of spare and modern, I immediately realize it’s not for me.
Hi Claudia – maybe it’s another one of my “bipolar” traits but I like my things around me. My own little personal treasures, talismans, touchstones and then I wake up one day and feel weighed by my possessions. So many times in the past, I have gotten into a blowing out the cobwebs mode and donated belongings. Then a few weeks or months later, I come to my senses and pine for the treasures I have discarded so abruptly. I’m trying to replace the discarding with organizing or packing away so they are there when I want them again. J
Good idea. I’ve been the victim of my own rashness in the past. Then I think: why the heck did I get rid of that?
It was in high school at Princess Anne High in Virginia Beach that I learned the meaning of awesome and it’s stuck with me ever since. I HATE the way some people use it indiscriminately about a friend being awesome. I know what they mean but it’s incorrect. I think schools have gotten away from teaching the basics anymore. In church I hear even well-educated men and women using “me and him/her.” Drives me up a wall. Why don’t English teachers correct them as mine did back in the 50s?! We would never have gotten away with some of the things that are spoken now. I have my standards and don’t lower myself to others. And don’t even get me started with “LIKE”! One young woman said it so much in her talk at church once that I told hubby if she said it one more time I was going to get up and smack her tush! She couldn’t talk without using “like” about every fourth word. Pitiful.
Okay, Connie, breathe, and get going on your day. Big breath…..in….out….in…out. See, you’ve struck a sore point with me today, my friend. LOL Words are important and have meaning. I better shut up now. ;-)
xoxo,
Connie
I hate this one, which I saw on a major website the other day: I like her and Jim’s apartment.
How about, I like their apartment?
Yes I find myself looking at a space that is uncluttered and looks so good…BUT is it what we want, NO! we want the comfort of “our things”. as you said about the keys..”they touched them”. I look around and most of my things are family pieces, it is a part of them I am living with and do not want to part with. So I will live a happy cluttered but tidy life and love it!
You’re right, there is enormous comfort in those well-loved things.
I’m constantly amazed at how many times I open your blog and as I read your latest post, think to myself, “Claudia, do you live in my head?!” My dh and I actually just had this conversation the other day, as we are preparing to leave on a holiday and the cottage we stay in is just 700 square feet, one bath, one bedroom, loft, living room, kitchen and laundry. Tiny but cozy and fits the two of us just perfectly. It’s sparse but comfortable. And then we come home to our house, 1880 feet plus our finished basement, giving us another 800 feet. More than triple the size of the small cottage. And like you, we are surrounded by our treasures, each with a history, a story and things we visually love to see. Antiques, linens, special items that belonged to our families and we now are the “keepers” of those items. We also have a precious piano that on occasion is played but it takes up room. Yet, we can’t imagine getting rid of it. It was my grandparents, it is where my dad learned to play, then my brother and I, then my kids and now our grandkids. It would be painful to sell it. Giving it to another family member would be acceptable but our kids don’t have large spaces just yet. So for now, it graces our living room, is lovingly polished every cleaning day and holds some of our most precious treasures on top. And vintage music in the bench.
I love going away and enjoying the space we occupy but coming home is sweet and our things make it cozy.
Thanks for another great post! I’m off to plant in the garden. A day that promises more rain but a bit of a reprieve for the morning.
Maybe the ideal thing is to be wealthy enough to have a get-away, where the decorating is spare. Then we could have the best of both worlds!
Long time lurker, first time to comment.
But as long as we are looking at tossing overused words, can we agree to toss “pop” (as in that pillow color really pops) and “juxtaposition”?
But I say lets keep toile, trompe l’oeil, jabot and bobeche!
I know your feelings about duvet but have to tell you a cute story. Several years ago when hubby was working part time for a large-box improvement store a woman was agonizing over the pretty new spring paint colors. Turns out she had just bought a bedspread that could not possibly work with any of the new colors she so desperately wanted and hubs says “I have two words for you. Duvet cover”. He sold her several gallons of paint that day. And all this time he really was listening to me! Who knew?
He also reminds me “your stuff will grow to the space you allow it”.
Love that wisenheimer!
P.S. Didn’t George Carlin say something to the affect that a house was a big lid to cover your stuff?
Oh, yes – ‘pop’ is getting a bit overdone!
Love the story of your husband and the duvet suggestion! A wise man.
And that sounds just like something George Carlin would say.
I too am sick of POP! THANK-YOU! I don’t even know what any of those other things are,so I’ll go along with that also! -Judy A-
I really identified with this post. I always do the same when I visit motels, other’s houses, etc. I imagine how I’d decorate it and where I would put stuff. It’s not so much that I’m dissatisfied with my space, I just have too much stuff that I can’t seem to choose what to loose and what to keep, so I keep it all.
Now as for vignette: I’m slow to focus and when I read things I often read they incorrectly, like vinetarette instead of vignette. It’s not till later that my mind catches up with what I read that I realize it’s not right. I don’t much like vignette, and curate sounds somewhat pretentious to me.
I love the comments here and agree with the words that bug y’all. I’d like to add mom jeans, just because I don’t want to show of the great devide, doesn’t mean I wear granny clothes or am not stylish – although it took me three years to embrace crop pants. You see I’m tall and before there were tall sizes, pants were too short and I didn’t want to look like I was wearing high waters.
Oh yes, Carol – mom jeans makes me crazy. It implies dowdy or something like that. I’m tall, too, so I get it. I just had this conversation with Don the other day: I certainly can’t dress like I did when I was 30, but does that mean I have dress in shapeless, what I would call ‘old lady’ clothes?
Any word that is overused becomes cliché and then starts to grate on my nerves. But what’s worse is incorrect grammar that people think is proper. Lately, the misuse of myself bothers me. Grrr. I talk myself down by telling myself that language is dynamic, not static. Still…..
As to stuff, yes, I find my home crowded when I return from a trip. I try to whittle things down regularly. If something comes into the house, something must leave. Or so I tell myself. I love my pretty china, my books, my found collections – they are the things that make my house my home. I don’t want to live in a hotel like atmosphere. Sometimes I look at the photos in magazines and think about how the room would look with a mug of tea and an open book on a table, a lap quilt on a chair, or a pair of shoes on the rug beside the front door. It would looked lived in, that’s what!
Our house definitely look lived in, Lorrie! Perhaps a bit too much?
Hi Claudia,
Just let me say I love my STUFF! When I was growing up We moved every time the bill collectors became a pain. Mom and dad would just pack us up in the middle of the night and off we would go. I have about three things that were mine from childhood. I married someone that still has the teddy bear he slept with and I love that! His mom saved most everything and we now have it in out home. DH sisters are not savers they have gotten rid of things that I just cringe at. OH well all of these are for a different post.
Suzan
Ladybug cottage
Don didn’t have a lot of stuff when we met – years on the road as an actor coupled with a nomadic childhood like yours led him to shed any possessions. Then he met me….and well, you know the rest of the story!
Note to Connie: I meant to add to my post that I’m from Newport News/Hampton area. I spent lots of weekends in Virginia Beach with friends. Just think, we may have passed each other on the beach :)
I probably have too much stuff– too many pictures on the walls, but it’s “stuff” I admire for one reason or another. Just need a bigger house ;)!! I’ve never liked the word “awesome,” but I admit I probably over use “cool.” What can I say? Victim of my era! If there were blogs in the 50s, folks might be complaining about “keen!” So it goes…
I need a bigger house, too, Diane. Not a great deal bigger – just a couple more rooms. Maybe three.
I love this post and I”ll tell you why.. Because it’s how I feel.. This is why now that my husband is able to move more we are throwing out or donating tons of just ‘stuff” I wan to replace it with “treasures” not just things.. I want to look around me and know that almost every piece holds a special meaning or memory…I can’t wait to do my house like this :)
Robyn
XO
I think that’s why I need to sort a bit. Most everything here is a treasure of some kind, but there are definitely things that could be tossed.
I do like how others are able to live minimalistically with no clutter…however I am very sentimental and must have all of my treasures surrounding me. My husband hates clutter so we are at complete opposite ends. I will have to be dead for him to bring in the dumpster and pitch it all. Until then I smile and enjoy everything I have. Refreshing Rain Smiles…
Luckily, Don doesn’t even see the clutter!
I like my stuff! Fifteen years ago we got rid of EVERYTHING and moved onboard our 44′ sailboat and lived in San Diego harbor area for five years. I loved it. On a sailboat you have the basic neccessities and a few — very few — extras. It was very freeing and felt like we had dumped a heavy load from our shoulders. Indeed, we had. Then five years later job situations made is necessary for us to move to the desert and buy a house. I shopped for 18 months to furnish it because we had nothing, nada, zero stuff to put in it. Now we’ve moved again and I got rid of a lot of things I had used in the first house and am tailoring the decorations to this new house. I take my time and find those things that speak to me and I like my stuff.
You’ve had nine decorating lives, Ann!
I can definitely appreciate other styles, but I like knowing there is one place that suits me perfectly. Home.
Great post, Claudia. (Notice I didn’t say awesome post, Claudia.) ;-)
And your home is lovely, Beverly!
What?!! You do not spend all of your time curating all of your awesome stuff into vignettes????
Me either. ;-)
I love all of my books/dishes/rocks/pillows/chairs/etc./etc./etc.
When I look at some of these “modern” spaces, all white and spare, I often figure they must be getting ready to paint. I need color and things to look at and touch. Claudia, I like your style. Birds of a feather.
Boy, I need color too, Teresa!
Good Evening Claudia, This post made me smile as when I returned from Natasha’s home in India, all the colours and much loved items glared at me aswell….. but that is because Natasha lives in a large, light and airy house and although she does have the things around her which she loves, it isn’t overpowering. I really did not think my home was overpowering until I returned. I kept looking at everything trying to decide what to clear out, but like you I could not as these things that surround us are a collection of 42 years of marriage. Again like you, I settled and it all became normal again….. that is until I visit Natasha next year!
Best wishes
Daphne
Yes, then it will happen all over again, Daphne!
I seem to go thru phases. It’s been especially weird since my mom died in the fall and my dad is wanting to disperse all the stuff between my sister, broth and I. I’m in temporary housing waiting for a new (smaller) house to be built, with no room left to store ‘stuff’ as it is. I do tend to like more ‘movement’ in my surroundings. But I don’t get overly attached to pieces. I have a ton of adult kids feathering their nests now, so I can usually pass on something from my mom or gramma to them, to keep the memory alive. But still, I have a hard time editing.
It’s hard to edit. I don’t have any kids, which makes it even more difficult.
I think you will find most everyone who reads and comments on your blog all say the same thing – we have LOTS of treasures, and we LOVE living with them. That’s one of the reasons we were attracted to your blog!! :)
Great minds think alike….
This retired museum curator is right on board with you. And don’t get me started on “awesome” and “vignette.” But you know my biggest peeve? Adore. I was taught, albeit many thousands of years ago, that adoration is reserved for God. Drives me mad to see it used for rusty doodads, pieces of furniture, etc.
When my parents moved from a very large house to a retirement village my mother gave away and sold so many of her treasures that she wound up saying, “I need more little things, I got rid of all of my little things.”
Although I now live in Texas, Connecticut is home; I’ve enjoyed visiting Hartford with you.
So glad you enjoyed the Hartford posts, Margaret.
And yes, we all need ‘little things’ – they make a house a home.
I do the same thing whenever we stay in a condo on vacation. I envision cabinets to hold yarn and my other treasures. A vase here. An afghan thrown on the sofa just so. That may be why I like my little trailer so much. It’s like a doll house to decorate with my treasures.
Blessings,
Betsy
Gosh darn it, Betsy, I’d love a little trailer. I’m envious!
I have a cup, though broken, that still whispers my daughters name. It is blue with white daisies, an orange interior and handle. She bought it for me for mothers day at one of those kitchen stores in the mall when she worked in the same mall during high school. I used it at home and eventually took it to work to use there because it was the perfect size and it whispered her name. I teared up the day I broke it in the sink while cleaning it but I brought it home with me. My fiancé realized how much it upset me to have broken it, because he’s sentimental too, and while I was out he tried to make it better by gluing the pieces back together. On my brand new dining room table with super glue. The ring of super glue in the finish of the table will always remind me of how much he cares and though the cup can’t be used anymore for it’s intended purpose it is one of my most prized possessions….because it still whispers.
Oh Rebecca, what a beautiful story – of your daughter’s love for you and of your fiance’s love for you!
I have always loved something William Morris said: Have nothing in your houses that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful.
Along with the word ‘vignette’, let’s please get rid of ‘shabby chic’ also! And artisan. No more artisans making shabby chic vignettes.
Oh yes, Josje! Please: no more shabby chic or artisan!
I am so with you, Claudia. My younger sister has sterilized her house. Too cold for me. I’m all for getting rid of vignette. :)
hugs,
Laura
That kind of decorating is rather sterile, isn’t it?
I am so with you, I decorate my house, I display my treasures, I don’t vignette, curate or stage. I live in my home and I surround myself with things that I love, things that make me smile and make me feel at home. I have treasures that have come from family and friends that are precious to me. I like to look at them. I don’t follow trends or worry about what everyone thinks is stylish. I like my quilts, baskets, collections and vintage things. I love seeing pig ornaments in every room of the house, they make me happy. I love the memories attached to the things in my house and the stories they hold. I am with you too on your blogging philosophy, I blog for me. I have been doing it for a couple of years and I think I maybe have had four comments. I write for myself and if my friends and family read it, I am good with that. I do it because it makes me happy and that is reason enough.
Being surrounded by things you love makes all the difference in decorating!
I have to have my stuff! Treasures! Whatever you want to call them. I hate clutter though, so I try not to over-do it and rotate things so I can enjoy it all. I’m not tired of the word vignette yet, but I AM tired of tweaking and pops of color. We’ll have to put on our creative thinking caps and think of some other expressions!
Part of the problem with so many blogs is that certain words get used over and over and they wear out their welcome pretty quickly.
I’ve pretty much stopped reading home decor magazines and blogs, so I guess I’ve missed people curating their homes! Too fancy schmancy and hifalutin for me. I had never seen or heard the word vignette used so often in my life, until I started reading blogs. I am embarrassed to say that I have typed it several times in response to someone’s arrangement of their stuff – got caught up in wanting to be part of the gang, I guess.
Oh! I am buried under stuff! I long for a surface without anything on it – I’m a keeper of things and feel so weighted down by them these days (having had to go through fifty years of my parents things the past two years). It’s become claustrophobic. And yet I am having such a hard time getting rid of things. I am sentimental about every thing. This has skyrocketed with my dad passing away in 2011 – now I fear getting rid of things in case I give away something that holds the key to a family mystery, or something. WAH!
Thoroughly enjoyed this post!
Sometimes I want to dump everything – but only for a fleeting moment. I’m like you, Sally, very sentimental about my things.
Easy Peasy is the one that irritates me..don’t know why..it just does..lol
Yes, I see that particular phrase everywhere!
*sigh* I have too much stuff and/or too little space right now. My fiancé and I moved into a small one-bedroom apartment from a more spacious two bedroom a couple of years ago and we’ve definitely have a lot of stuff. It drives me a little batty because I look forward to the day we can have a more spacious place with room to display our collections without feeling crowded. Soooooon, I keep telling myself!