Today’s theme: Bugs in the garden. I love to take pictures of them. Some of them are deliberate, others are accidental bug discoveries, only noticed when I examine the photo.
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One of the wonderful benefits of blogging is making friends, finding people that you wouldn’t know otherwise, discovering kindred spirits. I have been blessed with many wonderful followers over the years. In the course of 11 years of blogging, some followers have moved on. Maybe they don’t read blogs anymore. Maybe this particular blog no longer interests them. Maybe I pissed them off in some way. Who knows? I do know that there’s an ebb and flow to the whole thing – just as in non-virtual life.
At some point, I will register that I haven’t heard from so-and-so. In a few cases, I’ll write that person to make sure everything is okay because the lack of contact is unlike them and I worry.
That’s happened with one longtime follower recently. A while back, I realized that I hadn’t heard from her in ages, either here or on Instagram. And she is one of those followers who always leaves a comment. That concerned me. I found her email address and wrote her, not because she needs to comment, rather because the very lack of interaction from her concerned me enough to reach out and make sure she was okay. I wrote her on June 29th. I haven’t heard a thing. This week, I sent a direct message to her on Instagram. No response. She wrote on this blog as “nancybluemoon.” When I searched the comments on the blog, I discovered that the last comment she left was on April 15th.
I’m not sure what I can do other than what I’ve done. I have no other way to get hold of her. And I’m very worried.
We’re all connected here. Even if I haven’t actually met you face-to-face, we’re friends. And Nancy has been commenting here on the blog for years. Obviously, I’m concerned that something has happened to her.
I guess I’m sharing this with you because it’s been troubling me and I feel powerless. I know her last name, but a search on Google doesn’t provide any information.
Moving on is one thing, but disappearing from both the blog and Instagram is concerning, not responding to my email is concerning. The email didn’t bounce back to me, so the address is still valid.
I know you can’t do anything. I just need to share my concern with you today.
Thanks.
Happy Saturday.
I know what you mean—hope she is safe and sound and lets you and us know.
I wrestle everyday with social media and my presence on it. I’d like to quit it all, but worry about those I connect with only on face book and instagram. My social anxieties seem to be getting worse with age and I really prefer to connect online rather than face to face, though I hate to admit it. So, nowadays, I rarely post, but continue to read posts and blogs by others. Maybe that’s selfish, but just a “like” now and then does let them know I’m still breathing. When they disappear, I worry, too.
I’m the same way. I have a little ‘social anxiety’ as well. And you’re right. Just a ‘like’ tells me all I need to know as far as the person’s status.
hopefully nancybluemoon will read your thoughtful post and reach out.
i have no suggestions but to pray … and i will.
i appreciate your kind heart for the things and people of this world!
kathy in iowa
I hope so. And thank you for praying, Kathy.
I remember her as a commenter. I feel like I recall that she had, on occasion, even left a comment to MY comments here. It’s such a total dropout; it’s good of you to be concerned for her. We’ll hope for the best.
A newly-retired childhood friend of mine (age 62 at the time) suffered a brain aneurysm. She went from being this dynamic, independent, brilliant person to being one trapped in what was left after she awoke from coma, having to learn to do EVERYthing all over again, and any kind of correspondence or communicating by phone is very difficult for her even now (keyboarding is challenging/halting for her, even just a couple of words; she has some partial limb paralysis; can’t make financial decisions; has to have a part-time caregiver; she’s making impressive strides, last I heard, but it’s very, very slow). It’s really nearly impossible to communicate with her right now unless you physically visit her at her home.
So, it does make you wonder about nancybluemoon. Too many ‘life’ events can change things on a dime. I recall when my parents would get tons of Christmas cards each holiday (back in the day when people actually sent snail-mail greetings to one another) but, as the years went by, nothing from this or that person, and often my parents had no way to follow up to know what happened, so it remained a mystery as to what happened…
I do myself take breaks from blogging/internet and I guess I never flattered myself to think anyone noticed (since there’s so much activity out there; so many zillions of people online) but I’ll try to be sensitive to that here and not fall off without an explanation, Claudia. Again, it says a lot of good things about you that you care about your audience and that it’s personal to you.
There’s a blog I’ve visited for years and often made comments to the posts. Something changed on her site a couple of years ago to where it’s got limitations in how you can leave a comment and all mine to her are zapped (other readers of hers have complained similarly). Apparently she can’t fix it; so, for me, that’s a case when I totally dropped off but it’s not my fault; it’s a problem with her blog. I think there maybe are blog owners who don’t have your blog savvy, Claudia; they can only do the basics; can’t troubleshoot. I liked this gal a lot and I have to assume if she thought of me that she just included me with the group of commenters who can’t get thru on her site.
There was another blog I really, really liked SO much and one day, poof, she was gone. Never responded to comments; never posted again. Eventually her site was entirely removed. No explanations and, I mean, I was a DAILY reader. I figured the worst; how can we not assume? The only clue was that one of her children had been diagnosed with an auto-immune disease (I think) and I just hope the child didn’t die or something; maybe it was clearly taking all the blog owner’s time, to tend to the child, which of course was 10,000 times more important than a blog. I just always wondered; felt she could have come online and said, “Sorry, folks, I can’t continue with the blog anymore.” But, nothing. Curtain closed.
Worry. We ladies … we do worry. Maybe even for we who were never actual mothers, the worry is a sort of mothering. I dunno.
I can’t leave comments on any Blogger blogs. I don’t know why as I have an account and an old blog that’s still out there on Blogger. Who knows with these things?
Yes, I would expect a blogger to at least explain that they’re either thinking of taking the blog down or are going to. I do feel bloggers owe that to their readers. But sometimes, life happens, and I suppose it’s the least of one’s worries.
When you took some breaks, some reader asked where you were. You were missed!
Thanks, Vicki.
Lack of communication from Nancy does sound concerning. Unless she’s had a stroke and is unable to type. Did she mention living with a partner or having family in any of her previous responses? Even if someone is sick or in hospital, they usually keep in touch to let folk know how they are coping.
The fact that you’ve googled her and nothing has linked up hopefully suggests nothing awful has happened to her to merit being mentioned in a newspaper.
I’ve never been on Facebook and yours is the only blog I comment on (because it’s so good!) I also like the community spirit, love reading comments from your readers and want to say thank you for caring.
Happy Saturday
She has a son (who I believe is an adult) who has some problems with anxiety. He lives with her. But that’s all I know.
Thank you so much, Dee Dee.
I think many people have decided to eliminate blogs and facebook in their life
Time is precious so they are careful with it
I have eliminated many blogs from my life because there is no debth to them or they are very repetitive
I would not worry sounds like she has moved on
Actually, it doesn’t sound that way at all. She didn’t respond to my email and if she had decided not to read any blogs she would have told me. She’s very direct and honest and knows I wouldn’t take offense.
You are showing your concern as a dear friend and that shows the love you share with everyone. That, my friend, is why I love and follow your blog and you on Instagram.
Oh thank you, Cathy. Bless you.
being concerned about such an unexpected ‘silence’ is your mark as a caring person- there is a difference between ‘virtual’ and ‘in person’ but over time, and with some, those lines can blur and real caring can develop- I hope you are able to resolve your worry … that is definitely REAL-
as always, regards from Texas (where it is just too hot and humid to even complain about the weather)-
Barb
Thank you so much for your kind words, Barb.
Dear Claudia, I hope that Nancy is all right and will hear your concern somehow, and make contact. It just goes to show that with all the many avenues we have for communication, it still comes down to people reaching out to each other.
On a cheerier note, I want to share with you a little lawn project that involves LESS mowing. We have a front lawn that is about 40 feet deep. We don’t water it or seed it, but we have lots of different plants and flowers growing in it, that we have been mowing. We decided to leave a strip about 15 feet up, not quite side to driveway. I call it the “mini meadow.” It’s been going for about a month. I like it. Some of the little flowering plants have grown tall and have several blossoms instead of just one close to the ground. And we have a variety of dragonfly there that we don’t see anywhere else. FUN! And a little less mowing.
What a neat idea, Leslie! I love it!
Claudia, I don’t comment very often, but I love your blog. I read it every single day. We read at lot of the same mysteries, I love your decorating style in the cottage and am usually over the moon with your antique treasures. Just wanted you to know I enjoy all the effort put into your blog!
How lovey to hear those words, Judy. Thank you!
It’s so nice to read and understand how you really are interested in others. What a great way to be!! At this point in our country, if more people could behave this way, maybe we wouldn’t be so bloody anxious and stressed!
Hoping your “blog friend” is ok & maybe just taking a break from everything.
Sending good thoughts to you.
Your friend in OB! (you know, I’m originally from Framingham, MA!)
Thank you, Priscilla! We have Massachusetts and San Diego in common!
How typically sweet of you to be concerned about one of us. I read and enjoy your blog every day even if I don’t always comment. We are in the process of moving from our home that we have lived in for 41 years. Oh my goodness, this is a job both emotionally and physically. Your blog is one of the things that keeps my world stable as everything else goes upside down. Thanks for all you share ! ☺
Oh, I’m thinking of you! That must be very hard emotionally, Janet. Hang in there!
I totally understand. I remember asking about another of your followers a few months back, and indeed, I do now see her occasionally comment. Sometimes we all need a step back ~ most especially in this crazy world of today, but even one small comment every few weeks is nice to see. You understand that, I know, as we all tell you we worry and miss you when you don’t post. A few weeks ago you told us that may, indeed, happen, which is nice to know ahead of time. You truly have developed and built a community here, and I know that I think of so many of the people here also as “friends” and is so nice to follow them, as well!!
Humidity is doing its best to ramp up here, but we have kept the AC off so far today. I’m sure by late afternoon it will be back on and rumbling. And if THAT is the worst problem we have today, it will be a very good day, indeed!!
Yes, what concerns me the most is that she hasn’t responded to my email.
Humidity is already returning here. Yesterday and the day before I was able to keep the A/C until 2 pm, which was so nice for a change!
Claudia, your concern for your virtual friend is commendable, in these days of insincerity and anonymity. I love your blog, I love your writing, and I love how “real” you are. I very very rarely comment on other blogs I read and I don’t do any social media but two of the other blogs upon which I have made regular comments have yielded two friends. I email correspond with both of them. And I actually meet up with one regularly, as we found out we live a couple of hours apart (we generally meet halfway). I remember Nancy commenting (her unusual moniker) and hope she soon contacts you to tell you she’s fine and has moved on.
I hope she does, too. The fact that she didn’t answer my email is what concerns me the most. Thanks, Wendy.
I does sound like you have a reason to be concerned. I hope you hear something, Claudia. xo Laura
So do I, Laura. Thank you.
This does sound very concerning. I have told Brian that if something should happen to me, to please let my online friends know somehow. Like you, I have checked on certain online friends when I haven’t seen a blog post or comment from them in a long time. So far, in every instance they’ve been fine – just busy or lack of interest on being on social media/reading blogs anymore. I hope that you can find out what happened to Nancy. I remember seeing her name on your blog posts.
Yes, I’ve told Don where the password is to get onto this site. I’d want him to let people know.
Thank you, Melanie!
Food for thought. My dear-darling husband would have no idea where I go online. Or the people to whom I write on email (he and I don’t even have the same addresses; he wouldn’t know my passwords; he can’t even remember my birthdate!). Bigger responsibility if you have a blog. Thoughtful of you to think of it, Claudia.
No. Same here. Don and I have separate email addresses and passwords.
I can understand your concern. I’ve been reading your blog daily for I forget how many years and it has become part of my daily routine. It seems reasonable that reading the comments has become part of yours. I look forward to hearing the little ping from my phone or tablet which means Claudia’s posted! That ping can actually be grounding to me on a stressful or busy day when I need some sence of normalcy. I hope she sees this post or someone who knows her sees it. You’re a good person Claudia and it’s nice to know that you care about your “people”. Have a good day. 🌻🌼🌿🌾🌹
Thank you, Luanne. I am grateful for all of you!
I would be concerned also. I’ve had blog friends like that and now I’m one that doesn’t blog any longer but I do keep in touch with those who are special friends like you. I would miss not reading your blog and interacting with you. I’m not posting much on social media these days but life is very complicated at the moment. Maybe one day I’ll be back to something public. I would absolutely respond if someone emailed me or messaged me. In fact a few people have and I have let them know I’m doing OK just not blogging. I remember Jenny Matlock from years ago and have lost all touch with her. She had many physical illnesses and I just keep wondering, but sending prayers her way is all I can do. Hugs!
Oh, I remember Jenny! No blogging from her? That’s always upsetting. We consider each other friends in this community and when one of us just disappears, it’s very troubling. Thank you, dear Linda.
Your concern is why we all love you Claudia. It is why when I was absent for so long last year I felt I needed to tell you. There is a connection.
Have you tried putting her screen name into the FB search? She could use the same name there.
I have another email that I hardly ever look at, so if someone sent me an email there they wouldn’t receive it back either. Maybe she has a new email address.
I hope you get find some answers.
If you know where she lives try looking for in the local papers there.
Yes, I’ve tried that on FB. Nothing. I googled her name and Pennsylvania and nothing came up. Thanks, Trudy!
I really do hope Nancy contacts you, if only to tell you and us that everything is okay. It’s comforting, especially considering what social media has become, that this group of readers would come together in such support not only for you, but also for Nancy. But then again….these are your readers…and they are quite an extraordinary group of people. That’s because of you!
Hope you hear from her soon. Enjoy your day! ;)
I love my readers. They are such good people. Thanks, Donnamae!
Hope you hear from Nancy, if only to ease concerns. My guess is that this is just an instance of someone moving on. Things ARE different online. It’s one of the aspects of the Internet some people really like. One can just drop “out of sight” – so to speak – WITHOUT explanation. A “break up scene” – if you know what I mean. Maybe Nancy’s one of those people. She might just have “moved on” but isn’t replying because she’s not comfortable having to explain why. It may feel to her like she’s “rejecting” you and she’s reticent about hurting your feelings. ??? Just an idea. I know I’d feel the same as you – it’s hard not to feel personally in this situation. Oh well – have a great Saturday evening. Any movies on the docket? 💛🐝🕷
#Resist
#ImpeachTrump
That could be a possibility, but it seems doubtful given Nancy’s personality. She follows both Don and me on Instagram, and of course the blog. I hope that nothing has happened to her or to her son. Thanks, Janet!
I do hope you hear from your friend. I feel the same way about bloggers who suddenly disappear or friendly genealogists with whom I regularly correspond going long periods without writing.
You can’t help but worry, Linda. Thank you!
I’m always so late here. but I always read your blog every day and every comment!
people have been so kind to me. and to me that is a mark of the kind of community you inspire! I’ve shared laughter and tears and even anger with some past unfair remarks by a lone commenter! do they call them “trolls?” I’m not on twitter either.
I am not on any social media like FB or IG or LinkedIn. but I have friends who have IG especially and I look at those. I used to have a blog that was so much fun. but I was hacked twice and then had computer problems to boot. my email was changed at least twice by the Geek Squad at Best Buy. and I guess it was apparently necessary!
maybe that has happened to NancyBlueMoon too.
and I understand your concern. and in this fast changing world today…
that kind of wonderful sincere concern is heartwarming.
I don’t comment every time myself. but for the record…
I am always delighted with your blog! (AND Mere’s! I love that little z/little b!) and
your humor your courage your stamina your husband and your entire life!!!
thank you Claudia SO MUCH for the effort you make! bless you! XOXO
Oh, that commenter was despicable! I know exactly who you’re talking about!
Thanks, Tammy. None of this is like Nancy, or at least, like the Nancy who has been commenting here for years. But I also know things can change in a second. Hoping she’s okay.
It is so interesting that you posted this today. I’ve been thinking I should let you know how much I enjoy reading your blog. I don’t even remember how I found your blog, but I check it every day . You make me appreciate the value of seemingly insignificant daily occurnaces. You remind me to appreciate the birds on the feeder, the flowers in bloom, and the joy of finding “treasures” wherever they are. I also like to see what you are reading. I live in the deep South (Alabama), and you’d think our political and social points of view would be worlds apart. They are not. I share your view and I too have to step away from the news from time to time for the sake of my sanity. Your blog often provides some space for me to breathe. Thank you. -Linda
Thank you so much for this, Linda. I appreciate it more than you know. It’s the nicest thing you could say! xo
Claudia
Life is hard enough for us all, but even more so for such a sensitive caring person as you. You feel things so deeply while those of us who aren’t so philosophical merely shrug and go about our business.
Hope all is well with NancyBlueMoon.
Just thinking about Little Z’s smile makes me smile too.
Best wishes from Best Bun.
Thank you! Little Z’s smile makes me enormously happy!
Claudia I am one of your loyal readers you haven’t heard from in some time but I still read your blog every day. I haven’t had the greatest years so far health wise. Early in the year it was a month of back problems and for going on five months now I’ve been working to regain my mobility after a crazy injury to my left leg. Two months in a wheelchair & now trying to wean myself off the walker. Still babysitting two 2 year olds despite all that’s been going on. Also thanks to your influence I am enjoying my own blog where I share my writing with a small group of loyal readers. I love the pictures of your garden and home and the news of your and Don’s work. Thank you for sharing your world with us. Best wishes to you both.
I’m so sorry you’ve been going through all of that, Janie. My thoughts are with you and I know you’ll triumph. I can completely empathize with back problems! much love.
What a kind thoughtful person you are . You never cease to amaze me with your heart, intelligence and creativity. I hope you hear from from friend soon.
Take Care,
Kaye
Thank you, Kaye.
My dear friend Claudia…I am here…something has been telling me all day that I should check your blog…isn’t that strange?..Thank you and everyone who has shown caring and concern about me…it means so much to me…I am sorry about missing your email and will try to write to you and explain things hopefully tomorrow when I have more time…I hope that you and Don are both well…Hugs, Nancy
Oh, I am so, so happy to hear from you! Please write when you can and tell me whatever you can. The most important thing is that you commented and I’ve heard from you. xoxoxo
I just remembered to add this so you know that it is me..nancybluemoon…xoxo
I knew it was you. xoxo
Just as I was trying to type this last comment, and the site here kept telling me I wasn’t allowed (I’m having troubles on my end with the computer!), I rebooted and came back on, only to see Nancy’s comment above and of course I wanted to jump in and say I was glad she posted, just not before Claudia’s had a chance; but, wow, relief.
What I’d wanted to say before to Claudia: “I left a few other comments here but I neglected to say how stunning your ‘bug” photos are today. You are truly a nature photographer; you could publish a book on it! You could enter these photos in a photo contest, and win!”
I was so happy to read her comment. I can breathe a bit easier. Thanks for caring, Vicki!
It is frustrating to lose a a follower. I read a lot of blogs. There are a few bloggers that have not written or sent me any more e-mails. I wonder what happened to them. Hope NancyBlueMoon gets in touch with you soon.
Marilyn
She just left a comment, Marilyn. Just about an hour ago. I’m greatly relieved! Thank you.
Yay!! Like – Like – Like XO
Thank you, Martha.
I understand
I don’t do Facebook ornother social media-saw too much while teaching…
Anyway love love your blog. When a blogger doesn’t write for a few days I worry. Have to quit that !!!!
I like blogs about books and recipes for vegetarians and family-homes-like tours
I detest the ones selling things or political ones-certain political opinions I must add. Your blog is perfect !!!
Keep writing!!
You are special
Thank you so much for your kind words, Brenda.
Well I need to be careful typing on cell phone lol
xo
I know what you mean. I have actually had this happen with bloggers. They blog every day faithfully for years and then suddenly-nothing. You get to know them like family. Very disconcerting.
Very. You can’t help but worry. Thanks, Sandy.
Just chiming in with most of the above and how special to hear from Nancy!
Claudia,thank-you so much for being you exactly as you are and for you presence here!
Thank you for your kind words, Grace!
Yes, that is what friends do!
Thank you, Kelly!
Claudia I am your fan, I read all your posts, I do not comment almost because my English is terrible.
I know you’re out there, Edis. Thank you!
Isn’t it just amazing that Nancy got your vibe? I love that. Glad she checked in.
I feel so relieved, Jacqueline. Thank you!
I can understand your concern. It works the other way round, too. I’ve read and commented blogs for years. And then no new posts anymore. I comment, ask, but nothing, rien, nada. The blog is still here, the comment arrived, e-mail didn’t come back, but no response. Or the blog disappeared without any notice. I am worried. Hopefully, you will get an answer from her. Regula
Oh, I know. I’ve had the same thing happen. It’s worrisome, Regula!