A little daffodil coming out of the gravel by the porch. This particular daffodil is really abundant this year; both in the big garden bed and just beyond the shed. Gorgeous blooms.
My aim was to take it easy yesterday but, of course, I ventured outside and started to weed and clean up the borders of the beds. I finally dug out a rose bush that was nearly dead. It’s just a pain in the tush and it’s right by the Annabelle hydrangea, so getting rid of it will give me access to the Annabelle, should I need to severely prune it. Still watching it, by the way. Some new shoots are showing up near the ground, but I think I’ll have to cut a lot of it back.
Then I moved more gardening tools that I’d stashed on the porch to the shed.
My back was complaining so I stopped.
Which brings me to some questions you had in yesterday’s comments – basically, “Where do I get my energy?”
If you heard Don and I moan and groan about sore muscles, especially after we’ve mowed or done other work outside, you’d quickly realize that there is a trade-off involved with any outdoor chore these days. And it can be depressing. We hate that we get so tired and sore.
I have had to cope with the fact that I can’t work for hours outside like I used to. But I can work for 2 or maybe 3 hours. Afterwards, I’m tired and I generally have a sore muscle or two. Plus, I have bad allergies. The air is full of pollen. Working outside has consequences.
So I work in spurts. Sometimes I wear a mask. I always wear sunglasses to try and keep pollen out of my eyes. I did a lot yesterday. Today I’m sore and congested. So I’ll take the day off from outdoor chores and rest my back.
All that being said, Don always tells me I have great stamina. Look, I’m 69 and I’ll turn 70 this year. Don is turning 71 next month. We have to make adjustments. But if I want something done, I’m going to do it. Period. (The Hill girls are as stubborn as the day is long.)
For me, it’s all about getting back into shape after a sedentary winter. Truth be told, I tend to think of myself as lazy. And I am in some cases. But I’m not at all lazy when it comes to gardening or yard work. I love it. That makes a huge difference. It’s also a great form of exercise for someone like me who doesn’t like to exercise. I love to mow. So does Don. The first time we mow each spring is the hardest. We have a push mower and we tag team, but we have a lot of lawn on this property and it has to be mowed. Each time we tackle it, we gain more stamina. It will get easier each time as we develop our muscles. Same with garden chores. When Don is away, it takes me much longer to mow the front lawn. I take frequent breaks. I drink a lot of water.
I try my best to have a “Can Do” attitude. If it needs doing, I do it. There are a lot of ‘aging’ voices in our heads telling us we can no longer do this or that because we’re older. It’s easy to fall prey to those messages. I certainly do at times. And of course, I have to balance positive thoughts with practical thoughts, like ‘your back is hurting, it’s probably time to stop for the day.’ But I work very hard to think of age as a number and not something that defines me or the things I can do.
When I first moved to Brooklyn last fall, I was exhausted from the many flights of steps I had to take every day and all the fast walking I had to do to get to various locations. I wasn’t in shape for city living. When I was younger, I lived in big cities and the walking that was required each and every day kept me in great shape. (I miss that.) Back to the steps: I had to climb 2 very steep flights to my apartment. I had to climb several flights every day coming out of the subway and, in some cases, when transferring to another subway line within a station. My knees hurt. I was seriously out of breath.
It slowly got easier. I was still a bit short of breath, but less than I had been. Sometimes, depending on what point in the day it was, I had no problem at all. So, by the time I moved back home, I’d lost weight and I was in pretty darned good shape for a 69 year old who was routinely working 12 hour days with two more hours tacked onto that number for travel. I was tired most of the time, but that was because of the long, long days – something I hadn’t done since I was in my 30s.
I had to do it, so I did it. Sometimes, when talking to Don on the phone, I cried because I was so tired. I would say that I was too old for this. But, in the end, I proved that I could do it and that was a big victory for me.
Anyway. It’s not that I’m special or that I’m an athlete (hardly!) or that I’m in great shape. I just do it. And when it’s hard for me, Don often reminds me that I have more stamina than I think I do.
We cannot do what we used to in the way we used to, so we make adjustments. It can be disheartening at times, but the key is to not let it get you down. Make whatever adjustments are necessary. Work in shorter spurts.
We can’t afford to have someone mow our lawn every week. We can’t afford to have a gardener. And frankly, we like mowing. I like gardening. I wouldn’t want to turn those jobs over to anyone else. Some day we’ll probably have to – certainly in terms of the snow – but for now, we don’t. Not by a long shot.
Plus, you know I live for the spring when I can garden again. It brings me joy. And things that bring us joy are worth doing.
Let’s close with a photo of my nearly fully opened lilacs.
It’s going to be warm and sunny today, so I expect them to full open and then I’m going to pay them a visit and breathe in that heavenly scent.
Finished A Line to Kill by Anthony Horowitz and I’ve just started Something to Hide by Elizabeth George.
Stay safe.
Happy Wednesday.
thanks for answering those energy questions! i like hearing how other people, especially family members and friends, do things so i can hopefully do better myself.
i feel the same about priorities and interests … easier and more enjoyable to do.
i would also describe myself as stubborn (“determined” sounds better … ha) … though rewards motivate me, too, and are sometimes”needed” … ha.
those lilacs will be a great reward for you! so pretty and their scent is wonderful! :)
also, thanks for the lovely photos.
i have a big project ahead … sorting through lots of files and stacks of papers that (lack of) time and my broken back did not allow me to work on. there is a free paper-shredding event (provided by a local bank) in ten days so that’s my time frame to get this done! will feel better for having it done.
for now, soon will be out the door to walk with members of my family. :) going to be another hot, humid day here so we want to get out during the coolest part.
hope you all have a good day and stay safe!
kathy
Enjoy your walk with the family, Kathy!
Stay safe.
Claudia, my husband and I had a very similar conversation last night! People keep asking us why we don’t “slow down” (I’m 66 and Phil is 70) and the answer is because we don’t want to slow down! Our bodies are aging, of course, but we still have a zest for life, adventure, and doing the things we love, like gardening (me), golf (him) and camping (us). Sure, it involves resting more, making adjustments and sometimes doing things differently than in the past (we just bit the bullet and bought camping cots so we won’t have to awkwardly roll off a mattress in our tent and figure out how to stand up!) but we both think it’s so important to keep doing what brings us joy and appreciate all we can still do. Like you, if I want to do it, I get it done! Enjoy your gardening – my bleeding heart grew six inches yesterday!! Have a restful day today, Martha
Martha…your comment about the camping cots and not having to figure out how to pull yourselves up made me laugh. My husband and I are campers too only on a sailboat. Everything requires pulling and bending and climbing and so on and so on but it gets us out of the house. Enjoy your day.
Maria, a sailboat will definitely keep you in shape! We took over two years off and went cruising—basically living on our sailboat for 2-1/2 years! We saw a lot of water, weather, and a lot of different countries. Went weeks without seeing another boat. That was nearly 30 years ago, when we were in our forties. Now in our seventies, we think we are too old for that and so, bought a trailer. We’ll see how that goes.
I am in complete agreement with you, Martha!
(I did sweep the porch and vacuum, but that’s about it for today.)
Stay safe.
THANK-YOU for setting us straight. No magic Andrew Lessman vitamins or special aromatherapy or herbs…just a “move it or Lose it” principle. Goit it. I am doing my best to walk every day about four or five miles…my feet give out before I do but I love it. Not so much of a green thumb but do the basics. I have a problem with pushing myself too far with things I love doing but procrastinating or avoiding altogether things that should get done. Well I am going to be 75 in a couple of days and honestly it is hard for me to contemplate that number. In any case…thanks for sharing. The sun just came out….time to tackle those weeds.
Enjoy the day and the lilacs.
If you’re walking 4 or 5 miles a day, you’re in great shape, Maria! Yay!
Remember, age is just a number.
Stay safe.
Brian and I are younger than you and Don ~ I will be the big six-oh in August and Brian will be 62 in July. But I think we both have a lot of energy for people our age. We both still love yard work and do it all ourselves, too. We have no desire to move (yet!) into a townhouse and have someone else do the yard work. Brian works 12 hour shifts and gets up at 3:15 AM to work out first before working 6AM – 6PM. He also works a PT job on some of his days off, too.
I do all the housekeeping, laundry, shopping, errand running, menu planning, make all the meals, etc. I exercise every day in some form…walking, yoga, strength training. We have a flight of 13 stairs in our house and I go up and down them at least 10-20 x/day. We also eat a healthy, clean diet with lots of organic vegetables and fruits, no fast food, no preservatives or bad oils, etc. And I’m doing my best at meditating every day, too though sometimes I forget or skip it.
My mom will be 82 in July. She still lives on her own and is very independent. Still works PT (at the co she retired from – ha!), travels, maintains her 3 bedroom 2 bath townhouse by herself (plants her own flowers and mulches on her own, including dragging/carrying the huge bags of mulch by herself!), has a dog that she walks twice/day, active in her church, etc. She’s an inspiration to me!
Here’s to good health and energy…and less back problems!
Brian is amazing – and I know for a fact that his job would be classified as ‘stressful.’
We have stairs here as well and I go up and down them frequently, but trust me when I say they are nothing like a steep set of stairs in an old NYC brownstone (when you’re living on the very top floor) and are really nothing like the steep steps in the subway – you’re coming from deep under the ground, and there are usually several flights before you emerge from the station.
Your mom is also amazing. Bless her energy! Sounds like you have very good genes, Melanie.
Stay safe.
We were outside this morning. I had great ambitions, but this heat (89 that feels like 97…no really) and humidity are making the air stifling. So we settled for moving a large hosta before it really gets too large to transplant, and moving ferns. That alone took us quite awhile. I call our gardening method “ geriatric gardening”. Seemed appropriate. It involves working at a slower pace, taking lots of breaks, and bending, and kneeling in certain ways so we will not further injure ourselves! Oh…and drinking lots of water. I’m guessing you can relate…lol?
Bottom line…we do what we can, just not as fast nor for as long as we used to. Mowing is great exercise, along with gardening in general. I think what you and Don all do on your large property is to be commended. Now…it’s time for me to relax this afternoon. Enjoy your afternoon, too! ;)
Same here. I did very little today – swept the porch, put a few things away in the shed and now I’m back inside with the heating pad on my back (hurting from yesterday’s work) and I’m looking at miniatures. Enjoy your relaxation, Donnamae.
Stay safe.
I feel the same as you. I don’t like to exercise, except walking Gracie, our Golden, with Bill. But my love that will always keep me going is gardening. My mom was and avid gardener and passed it on to me. Bill will yell at me “You are not going to be able to move tomorrow!” Oh, but it is a good hurt, as I sit with the heating pad right now. We do not have any stairs, even though I always wanted them. Our backyard is much smaller than our house of 30 years we lived in.
I had about 40 rose bushes and all the other plants. When we downsized I knew I could never take care of that many rose bushes again, and I am fine with that. I was out in the yard for a good amount of time this morning, and, yes, I hurt! My husband always tells me I have to prioritize. I have to admit he does most of the cooking. I love to bake, but that is it. So we even out our chores very well. Do you fit cooking in your day too? I think I remember you saying Don cooks a lot. Well, out to the yard again. Take care!
Don is the cook. I bake, but since we’ve eliminated sugar, I don’t bake very often!
Stay safe, Deborah.
I miss the lilacs.
Yep! You just have to keep moving. I washed my floors the other day on my hands and knees. It took two days to recover. We walked 9 miles a day in Paris but I had to rest in the afternoon. It is frustrating not to be able to do what I used to but like you, I do what I can and sometimes push a little harder.
Enjoy spring in the garden. How fun!
Completely agree, Kay. We push a little harder!
Stay safe.
Thank you, Claudia, for your wonderful words of wisdom (encouragement for me). I’m older than you and Don, have always had stamina, but not a lot of energy but was able to push through and do things I needed to do. Recently, I was diagnosed with a serious health issue (on top of the usual annoying ones of aging) and it’s been a struggle to maintain a helpful attitude. Your post came at a perfect time and it really, really helps! So, thank you, again!
Caroline
Oh, Caroline! I’m sorry to hear you have a serious health issue. Sending healing thoughts your way.
Glad to have helped a little.
Stay safe.
Lilacs; gorgeous.
Thanks for answering some questions about stamina, strength, energy. My husband and I are so close to you in age. He is currently walking eight miles per day because of the large-breed foster dog who needs SO much exercise to balance out all that wild/mostly-negative energy (to calm his anxiety, the poor dog [four walks per day of two miles each; huge commitment on the part of my husband!]); so, human-guy has lost some weight! Me? I can only do so much, because I have a lot of health problems my husband doesn’t have, but I think I can probably do more than I think I can; I just need to be more brave and start slow. Am seeing the primary-care/family doctor tomorrow and I will ask some more questions after I get my checkup.
I can see from what you’re saying that it’s mind over matter within reason, and how you can build up the strength even in these later years and not let oneself get defeated, so it’s a lot of determination mixed with, as you said, a stubbornness to not be sidelined. Nobody’s gonna do it for us and, as someone else here said, if you don’t use it, you lose it. I’ll take a lot of this to heart. I need this kind of inspiration. As I’ve read you and the other readers here, it seems to very much be about ‘will’, the wanting to do … that determination and grit … and being optimistic and hopeful about it. And of course the resulting feeling of accomplishment is a satisfaction that can’t be beat!
Certainly at times, in my long road of poor health (the past 22 years), I’ve nearly given up, let physical illness tank me; accept it too much instead of fighting against it; when I’ve figured I can never regain my own vitality, but I am determined to find my way back. I’m fortunate that my husband, relatives and friends are very encouraging. So, thanks to all; a lot of great tips.
(I still think you and Don are pretty amazing, Claudia.)
You can do it, Vicki. Of course, with health issues, you have to wise. But you’re right – there’s a balance to be found between giving up and giving yourself a little push.
Stay safe.