It’s almost Valentine’s Day. I don’t know about you, but I’m celebrating the end of all the heart-shaped jewelry commercials. Especially the one with a heart-shaped pendant in the middle of a box of chocolates; clearly targeting those guys out there who are overwhelmed with deciding what to buy.

We tend to be low-key on Valentine’s Day. Sometimes flowers are delivered, sometimes we exchange cards, sometimes not. We say I love you to each other several times a day, every day. Holidays with a commercial bent like Valentine’s Day, Sweetest Day, Mothers Day and Fathers Day sort of drive me up the wall. If you love someone, you should express that love every day, not because someone decided you have to on one ‘special’ day. I’d rather have an honest, spontaneous ‘I love you’ any day.

I tend to be that way. If I hear that everyone is doing it, or that I must do something a certain way because that’s what’s cool now,  or that my blog should look a certain way because that’s what everyone is doing now, or that I must watch a certain movie or read a certain book because everyone is watching or reading it – well, for better or worse, I dig my heels in. I don’t like anyone telling me what I should do or like or read or watch. I would say that I’m stubborn, and I am, but it is really more about knowing myself. One of the perks of getting older is casting away all those ‘shoulds’ and embracing what works for me. “If everyone said to jump off the Brooklyn Bridge, would you do it?” Mom said that to me many times in my formative years, those years when being just like everyone else seemed to be so important. I guess it stuck. I’m not like everyone else. I’m me.

Believe me, I’ve been there – I made many decisions based on what I felt “others ‘ thought I should be doing. On on an image of myself that I wanted to create, but that wasn’t the real me. Those decisions never really felt right, deep within.

Though it seems like everyone is doing it, I don’t watch most reality television. First of all, it’s not reality. It’s manufactured and pumped-up by the creators to show the worst in people. It’s created to appeal to the voyeur in all of us. Why would I want to spend time with people that I don’t respect or like? It also takes work away from my husband and every actor trying to earn a living because it’s cheaper to produce.

I’ve often avoided movies that are supremely hyped because I get so sick of the constant advertisements and the “everyone is seeing it” blurbs. If everyone is…I probably will hold off for quite a while.

I’ve read several posts lately saying bloggers should have a white background. And sure enough, I’m seeing them everywhere. Or that a blog should consist of this, that or the other. Some of this advice is very helpful to a beginning blogger. However, a blog is a highly personal journal. I think white backgrounds are just fine and if you choose a white background because you genuinely like that look, great.  But if you prefer something other than white, go for it. Your blog should reflect you. I can tell you with no hesitation whatsoever that I will not be following that trend.

Neither will I be going for the very popular white-on-white decorating look. It’s striking and I certainly love seeing it in the homes of many bloggers, but it isn’t for me. I like and need color.

And though it sometimes seems as if everyone is doing it, I also won’t be going on Twitter.  Who needs to hear the minutia of my life? You probably get enough of that on this blog! I don’t think you really need to hear that I’m on my way to the gas station. Or that I just picked up 4 rolls of toilet paper.

I try to stay away from endless 24-hour political blather on television. I don’t like anyone telling me what to think or believe. I read, research and then make my decisions based on what I feel is right, fair and compassionate. I have my own mind, thank you. Someone saying something is true does not make it true.

This reads like a list of what I won’t do but it really is about a simple idea. “To thine own self be true.” Shakespeare again. That man was so wise. Celebrate because you want to, watch or read something because you want to, design your blog or decorate your home the way you want to, believe in something because you feel it is right, not because some talking head on television tells you to. It’s easy to do what everyone else is doing. It can seem harder to go your own way – but really, it’s quite simple.

And yes, I bought even more Perle cotton in NYC the other day – enough to make that pretty heart. And display in this glass jar.

You know that story I told you about the other day? About my wallet being stolen the same night Don kissed me for the first time? After Don left, I canceled my credit cards and had the locks changed. About a week later, I got a call from a telephone repair man. He was repairing a phone in a phone booth in a not-very-nice area of San Diego. He found my wallet there. The cash was gone, but everything else was still there. He took the time to drive all the way to my apartment and push it through the mail slot, along with his card. He was nice and kind and helpful. He made my day.