Yours truly is tuckered out today. Since Sunday, we’ve been working outside for several hours every day – mowing, weeding. working on some areas of the back forty, cleaning gutters, weeding some more, clearing the trails in the woods, etc. Today, I’ve opted for some rest, though I do have clean the tub and floor in the bathroom. On one hand, we love that we are strong enough for some physical labor, on the other hand…we’re sort of tired.
Yesterday, we spent all morning on a self-tape audition that Don had to submit. It was rather complicated but it went fairly smoothly and Don was happy with it. The rest of it? You just have to let go because there’s no controlling the outcome. As I always say it’s a bit of a crap shoot. In fact, every potential job in theater, film, or television is definitely a crap shoot.
Control is an issue of mine as an adult child of an alcoholic. It’s also an issue for my sister. When you grow up living in an environment that can go out of control at any minute, having any sort of control is desperately needed. It’s why I don’t drink and never did drugs. It’s also why I need to feel in control of most situations, but of course, that isn’t always going to be the case. Don recognized this about me early on. I sometimes have to cede control and that is a good thing. Don – even though he’s also an adult child of an alcoholic – is more spontaneous. I’ll always opt for control, though. It makes me feel safer.
I can hear the mourning dove calling as I write this. That makes me smile.
Uh oh. The thought of mowing the back forty just popped in my head. You see? The urge to go outside and do something is back. But the bathtub! And the floor!
We’ll see what happens.
Stay safe.
Happy Friday.