introvert

Thursday Thoughts

June 16, 2022 at 9:03 am by Claudia

• Yesterday, I was talking to my best friend on the phone, while sitting on the porch glider. About 5 minutes into our call, I saw a deer run across the street toward our house, run up the driveway and then to the corral and the woods. Luckily a car slowed down and the deer made it safely.

We continued talking. I’d say it was about 20 minutes later when a fawn – THE fawn – also ran across the street, jumped the culvert and ran in the same direction as the other deer. This fawn is very, very small, by the way. It became clear that the deer that I saw earlier was the fawn’s mom.

Both times, I held my breath, praying that they would cross the road safely. Remember, this is a very busy road.

Later in the conversation – maybe 10 minutes later? – I looked up to see the fawn on the front lawn, clearly still looking for mom. I stood up because I knew I had to stop her/him from running across the street again. As soon as we locked eyes, she reversed and ran back up into the woods.

After we finished talking, I put on my muck boots and walked through the woods, looking for mom and baby. I never saw them. So I kept watch for a couple of hours, just in case I needed intervene. Poor baby was frantically looking for mom! But she never came back so I have to think they found each other.

And that’s how I proceeded to worry about the fawn for about 3 hours.

• In other news, Jim Parsons messaged me on Instagram yesterday with the news that Spoiler Alert (the movie we worked on) is coming to theaters on December 2nd. Whoo hoo! This is very exciting. It will premier less than a year since we wrapped the film, which was on December 10th of last year. I can’t wait for you to see it.

• Day three of the January 6th Committee Hearings is today at 1:00 pm EST. Be there or be square.

• We got up around 5:30 this morning and soon after that, we had a morning thunderstorm. There’s something about early morning thunderstorms that I love. Sipping a hot cup of coffee, lamps on because it’s still somewhat dark, and thunder and lightning filling the skies. Very cozy.

• Question for introverts: Have you run into problems with some friends who don’t understand what an introvert is? Or take your need for home/quiet/solitude personally? That’s what Laural and I were talking about yesterday. (Note: Laural completely understands and accepts me and she’s an extrovert. I was talking to her about other friends.)

I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Okay.

Stay safe.

Happy Thursday.

A Hot Weekend Ahead

May 21, 2022 at 9:35 am by Claudia

The bridal veil spirea is in full bloom; lots of frothy blossoms down by the edge of the road. A big thank you to whatever previous owner decided to plant it years ago – I so enjoy these beautiful little flowers. A mass of white in the midst of the spring green that is everywhere.

I worked outside yesterday, knowing that for the rest of the weekend, we’d be trapped inside due to the heat that will plague us today and tomorrow. A heat index of 97 or 98 today, only slightly less tomorrow. Then the usual threat of severe thunderstorms as the front exits and we drop 20 degrees on Monday. The weather has been truly insane. I noticed that Colorado got snow yesterday!

I mowed the lilac side of the lawn, pruned some bushes, and pulled lots of weeds. After I finish this post, I’ll go outside and water everything before it gets too hot.

Thanks so much for all your comments yesterday. There are a lot of introverts here, but there are also those who consider themselves extroverts. Or a mix of the two. I am very friendly when out and about, I smile, I hold doors open, I often interact with babies (they tend to like me,) I talk to people in line, I’m chatty with store clerks. I helped a woman carry a shopping trolley up two flights of subway stairs when I was living in NYC. That’s my nature. It’s also Don’s nature. I was raised to be friendly and polite and helpful, to put others at ease. Interactions are wonderful, but they don’t require much beyond that moment in time. It’s prolonged social interactions, crowds, having to hit the on button and stay there for a long time – that’s all very hard for me. When at a large gathering Don and I often joke about our need to have an exit strategy; “When do you think we can leave?”

I wouldn’t go on a tour with lots of people; it would drive me crazy. Same for a cruise. I love to travel, but I usually do it with Don or, in the case of coaching, alone, and I like to explore on my own, on my terms.

Oh, I could go on and on, but I’ll stop there.

I am going to get that book and the other book that was mentioned in the comments. It helped to hear your thoughts about them.

A bee dining on Solomon’s Seal.

So, given the temperature, we’re hanging out indoors today. For those of you facing this same heat wave, stay safe and hydrate. Better yet, stay inside!

I’ll leave you with this:

Wren, standing by my easel wondering why I’m not painting anything.

Stay safe.

Happy Saturday.

Thoughts on Being an Introvert

May 20, 2022 at 9:01 am by Claudia

A very foggy morning.

More strange weather ahead: tomorrow the high is going to be 94° with a heat index of 97°. On Sunday, the high will be 92°. What the ?????? Then, after the storms that will come through because of this crazy weather, the temps will drop back down to the seventies next week.

As you can imagine, we are installing the kitchen a/c unit this morning. Yikes. I’m going to do some work outside today, because I sure won’t be doing any of that over the weekend!

Another day yesterday of taking it easy, mostly because it rained. I finished the Elizabeth George right before dinner – two minutes to spare! Excellent. I have already grabbed A Banquet of Consequences from my TBR pile and I’ll start that today. I’m obviously in an Elizabeth George mood.

I’ve been thinking about being an introvert, which I’ve written about once before on this blog. I’ve been trying to describe just what that is to a friend, so it’s obviously been on my mind. For much of my younger life, in a house full of four kids, one bathroom, and very little personal space, reading was my way to grab some alone time, even if I wasn’t literally alone. I was immersed in the words on the page, and my imagination transported me to another world. Because I was in school and performing in plays and musicals, I had the trappings of a very social life. As I got older, I craved alone time more and more. Especially when I entered my thirties and moved to Philadelphia to go to grad school. For many years, I categorized that need as ‘I need time to myself’ or even ‘I’m a bit of a loner.’ It wasn’t until relatively recently that I realized I was an introvert.

I often felt like I had to apologize for being ‘antisocial.’ I really wasn’t antisocial – I worked in the theater, after all! – but on a personal level, some friends who were highly social just didn’t understand me. They took it personally. And so I felt guilty, like I’d done something wrong.

If I had a nickel for every time I felt that guilt, I’d be a rich woman.

As I’ve grown older, after a lifetime of working in the theater and teaching where I had to be around lots of people all of the time, my need to retreat has grown. And you know, I love my work. I love that opportunities I’ve had to get to know so many people over the years, whether in a theater or in a classroom or as a camp counselor. It’s not that introverts don’t like people. They just need time to ‘restore’ their energies. To go to the well.

Don, who is more of an extrovert, also feels that need lately.

I’ve always avoided entertaining people in my home. It takes every bit of joy out of me. I feel enormous pressure and I am simply exhausted when it’s over. I so admire those who can pull that off with great aplomb. I admire those who can maintain a highly social existence.

However, I cannot, and owning that truth about myself has been life-changing. I’ve talked a lot about it with Don. Thankfully, he has always understood me, even when I wasn’t yet using the word introvert.

I must admit that I still feel guilty at times. I guess that a lifetime of feeling you have to apologize for who you are can still push those buttons. Like many of you, lockdown wasn’t at all hard for me. In fact, it gave me permission to be myself.

I spent a lot of time thinking about this yesterday. Both Don and I are creative artists who spend a lot of time in our heads. It is very easy for us to disappear into our work or our books. In fact, that’s what a typical day here is like. Don doing his thing, me doing mine.

We had a conversation the other night about why we would rather stay home in the evenings than go out. We love our evening routine, coming together in the quiet of our den to watch a movie or a series. The reality is that both of us have spent the bulk of our lives working in the evenings. I was routinely out at least 6 days a week acting in plays or attending rehearsals or taking notes on performances. Don, a professional actor since he was 18, was hardly ever home at night. So now that we have the opportunity to stay home, we stay home!

We like being home. We like the quiet.

I’m sort of rambling now, so I’ll stop.

I’m thinking of ordering Quiet: The Power Of Introverts In A World That Can’t Stop Talking. Someone mentioned it to me a while back. Has anyone here read it?

Stay safe.

Happy Friday.

Thursday Thoughts

A Hot Weekend Ahead

Thoughts on Being an Introvert

Lambs Like to Party

A Note

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