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If Only

April 29, 2016 at 9:09 am by Claudia

4-29 about to be lilacs

So close. I expect them to pop any day now.

My plans to head into NYC were changed when the director of the project (whom I have never met) decided he was going to ‘pull back’ on the accents the actors were using, so he wouldn’t need my help. That’s fine, though I lose some potential income. I laughed a little, however, because asking an actor to pull back on a dialect or accent without telling them specifically what to change or how to change it is problematical. You have to give them specific sounds to change so that they’re not put in the awkward position of having to ‘soften’ something. Oy.

I worked on miniatures for a bit yesterday afternoon. Today? Mowing day. At this time of year, the grass grows so quickly that we have to keep on top of it.

4-29 about to be lilacs2

Yesterday, we were on a trail walk. Don starting talking about how wonderful it would be to live in a small town where the pace of life was slower, where you knew everyone and shopped for your food daily, where children could play outside and be safe; basically, where you could hide away from the horrors and politics and stress and pressure of the world.

I said “That’s Three Pines! That’s why everyone who reads Louise Penny’s books about Three Pines says they want to move there.” (I’ll add Mitford, as well.) I described Three Pines to him, hidden away in Quebec, not on any map, a haven for all, with spotty cell phone and internet coverage, if any. A bistro, a bookstore, a bakery, a general store, and a green in the center of town where children play.

We’ll leave the murders that are the basis for the plots out of the picture.

I second him on that wish. In the meantime, we can limit our time online (we do), we can limit our exposure to 24-hour cable news, we can choose when and how to engage. We were saying that we often think it would not matter one iota if we ever knew about most of the stuff we read online or hear on the news. Much of it just sparks more fear, more worry, more stress. There’s something to be said for the bliss of not knowing. (I’ll add that of course I believe that being informed about certain things is necessary and important – you know that.)

Sometimes, I have a strong desire to live off-grid somewhere, or move to a small town in Italy, where the pace of life is entirely different than it is here. Heck, my mother was Canadian – if Three Pines really existed, I’d be moving there.

Ah well.

Today marks six months since my father died. A bittersweet day. That, and the realization that Scout would never lie in my ‘tunnel’ again led to me starting the day in tears. Mowing is just the thing I need today!

Happy Friday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

Filed Under: Dad, life, Scout 46 Comments

Reading on Sunday

April 17, 2016 at 9:42 am by Claudia

4-15 succulents

I’m getting to the blog a little late today. Sometimes it’s a treat to allow myself to read for an hour or two in the morning – which is what I did today. The book I’m reading isn’t even all that great – it’s what I’d call “mystery-lite”, but it’s interesting enough to provide a nice respite on this Sunday morning. A cup or two of coffee and a book to read spells perfection to me.

I’m going to be doing a  lot of work outside today. As of today, I think we’re past the very cold nights that have been the norm. The temps are hitting the 70s today, with abundant sun, so it’s time to rake the leaf mulch out of the garden beds. Huzzah! Yesterday, I went to Lowe’s to buy a child’s rake because our regular leaf rakes are too wide to maneuver around delicate new growth. It’s something I should have done long ago. It’s a cute rake, by the way, bright yellow.

I read the most interesting article in the New York Times today. It’s about Mary Beard, who is a professor at the University of Cambridge, a prolific author and an authority on ancient Roman culture. She has become an outspoken critic of internet trolling. In her case, as she is seen on British television frequently, the trolling started out as mean barbs about her appearance, written through the vehicle of social media. She was nearing sixty with naturally gray hair and this, apparently, was all trolls needed to generate negative comments about her appearance.

“When you look at me on the telly, and say she should be on ‘The Undateables,’ you are looking at a 59 year old woman. This is what 59 year old women who have not had work done look like. Get it?” -quoted from the New York Times article. (The Undateables is a British reality show. Oy.)

Bravo. I love this woman. She also responds to this sort of thing with dry humor, which is always more effective than anger. There’s nothing wrong with getting work done or coloring one’s hair, of course, but for those of us who choose to look the way we are at this point in time, it’s unbelievably refreshing and affirming.

That brings to mind a lot of things, many of which I have written about in past posts, so I don’t really need to go into it again. All I know is I want to know more about Mary Beard and I applaud her wholeheartedly.

Have a lovely day – I hope the weather is spring-like in your neck of the woods.

Happy Sunday.

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Filed Under: aging, life 41 Comments

Kindness Matters

April 15, 2016 at 9:48 am by Claudia

4-15 kindnessmatters2

I saw this in a shop while we were in Florida.

It’s one of those magnetic signs that can be put on a car and it’s now on my car.

It has sort of a sixties vibe, doesn’t it? Well, I came of age in the sixties and I’m proud of it.

Kindness matters.

It matters a great deal. Kindness comes from the core of a loving heart. Love for our fellow man, love for animals, love for our planet – love for everyone, no matter their color, race, or creed, no matter their economic status, no matter their sexual orientation, no matter what.

It doesn’t spring from fear, which seems to be ruling our world right now. It is certainly where the inflamed rhetoric that has been spewed out on a regular basis during this Presidential campaign comes from. It’s ugly, vile, hateful, and beneath contempt. The fear-mongering, the disrespect shown to women, the disrespect shown to fellow candidates, the disrespect shown to our sitting President, the disrespect shown to those who have suffered, are suffering, to those with disabilities – is this what we want to be made of? Is this how we want to conduct our lives?

I’ve known a few people in my life who have resorted to verbal attacks that were blistering, hurtful and cruel – not just once, but many times. This is what happens when a bully is cornered. They come out swinging, saying anything and everything in order to ‘win.’ And there is never an apology because that would mean taking responsibility for their actions. Winning is all, even if it means losing a friend or making an enemy in the process.

I do not continue those toxic relationships, though I have compassion for their obvious pain and a wish for peace to envelop their hearts.

We’re seeing much the same thing in this election process. Bullying. Hateful rhetoric. When cornered, attack. When challenged, attack even more. Never admit you’re wrong. Be a winner, not a loser. Make fun of those who have less. Make fun of the way people look. Make fun of those who might disagree with you.

Not to mention the strong-arm tactics that look like something I thought I would never see in this day and age, that bring to mind newsreel footage of fascists who would rough up those who protest, throw people out of a rally based on the color of their skin, deny any sort of healthy discussion.

They’re afraid. They react from a place of fear, which quickly turns to hate.

Why do we tolerate this in anyone, let alone someone who is running for the Presidency?

Kindness Matters.

I see no kindness there. I see someone who talks about excluding, about winners and losers, about torture, about punishing women, about bombing the innocent in order to win. I see someone whose ego needs to be constantly fed, who needs to have his name in the news – it’s like mother’s milk to him – who, at heart, is a child who never grew up, who knows nothing except how to bully, how to attack. His ego will never be fed enough. It will always crave more.

“He started it.”

Oh, for heaven’s sake, are you 6 years old?

Look, I have strong political beliefs and if you’ve read this blog for any length of time, you probably have a pretty good idea of where I stand. I have issues with other candidates as well, big issues, but those I will keep private as this is not a political blog.

This however, is different. This is shameful behavior. This is behavior I wouldn’t tolerate in a child, let alone an adult. This is embarrassing to those of us (and I have to believe it is most of us, please, let it be most of us) who believe differently and are horrified that this is getting media attention all over the world.

I have a theory. We now have a whole group of people who watch reality television and think it’s real. It isn’t, of course. It’s staged. (If you think it’s real, you need a reality check.) There is a segment of that programming that plays to the worst part in all of us. People say vile things, they physically attack each other, they say and do all that we were taught not to do. And people watch, just like spectators cheered as they watched the horrors in the Roman Colosseum, or watched gleefully as people were executed at the guillotine.

They think it’s real and, even more disturbing, they think it’s acceptable.

It isn’t.

Public discourse has sunk to a low that I haven’t seen in my lifetime.

And in walks a carnival barker who, like any shill worth his salt, knows how to play to those people. He plays on fear, on xenophobia, on racism, on the very disrespect we see on the shows of Jerry Springer or Maury Povich, or in political discussions on cable news, or on ‘reality’ television.

He’s speaking to the worst part of us. And, like those who are sure they  will be the ones to win the carnival barker’s game even though it’s rigged against them, people are buying this crap, even excusing it.

There is no excuse.

Hate breeds hate. Love breeds love. Kindness breeds kindness.

Like most of you, I was raised to say please and thank you, to respect my elders, to admit when I was wrong, to take responsibility for my actions, to treat everyone as my equal, to be kind to animals, to love my fellow man.

I have a real problem with the theory of American Exceptionalism – at least as it’s used today. It bothers me. I’m not a flag waver, which doesn’t mean I am not patriotic, it just means that I think we need to show who we are by our actions. Waving a flag is easy. Doing what is right is harder.

But if you believe in that concept of Exceptionalism, which is based on the idea of a free nation with democratic ideals and personal liberty, then surely this sort of exclusionary, hateful rhetoric is directly opposed to that concept. It’s everything our forefathers fought against.

Kindness cannot exist in exclusion. Kindness cannot exist in hate. Kindness cannot exist in bullying. Kindness cannot exist in bigotry or xenophobia. Kindness cannot exist in cruelty. Kindness cannot exist in anything other than love.

Kindness Matters. It matters now more than ever.

Happy Friday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

 

 

Filed Under: life 88 Comments

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Welcome!

Welcome!

I live in a little cottage in the country with my husband. It's a sweet place, sheltered by old trees and surrounded by gardens. The inside is full of the things we love. I love to write, I love my camera, I love creating, I love gardening. My decorating style is eclectic; full of vintage and a bit of whimsy.

I've worked in the theater for more years than I can count. I'm currently a voice, speech, dialect and text coach freelancing on Broadway, off Broadway, and in regional theater.

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