On The Road — Page 48

Between

January 25, 2016 at 9:16 am by Claudia

1-25 scoutie

I arrived back home around 1:00 to find this girl waiting for me. She was sleeping. Frankly, she was having a bad day, poor girl. I spent a lot of time lying beside her on the floor telling her how much I love her. She’s not doing very well at the moment. And I imagine the very cold weather is very hard on her. I’m just grateful there hasn’t been a lot of snow and ice this winter.

We know that we don’t have that much longer with our girl, so we’re treasuring the time we do have.

It’s lovely being home, but it’s strange. As always in this situation, I feel like I’m between two worlds, my life here at home and my life on the road. Not quite here, because I’m only here for about 24 hours, and not quite in Hartford, because it isn’t my permanent home. But since I’m working in Hartford and I have a lot more work to do there, Hartford has the pull at the moment. Don tells me to just enjoy it and he’s right. It’s a gift to be able to just concentrate on doing my work, without the distractions that are always present at home. And by the time my work in Hartford is winding down, I’ll be ready to come home and stay home for a long while.

But Scout is worrying us. And that pull, that worry, weighs on me when I’m in Hartford, as it weighs on Don at home. She was in the den with me yesterday afternoon and she kept raising her head to look at me as if she wanted to make sure I was still here.

And I’m leaving again.

It’s a good time for us but it’s also a very tough time. Add to that my ongoing grief for my father, the moments when I am taken aback by the tears that appear suddenly in my eyes and that I try to hide from everyone when some part of the text in Romeo and Juliet speaks of death, or when I’m driving home, as I was yesterday, and I remember moments in the last hours of my dad’s life, how everything changed so suddenly, when I’m reminded of the look in his eyes as he knew he was dying – in those moments I gasp at how quickly I am overcome with sorrow.

I have to work and I love my work. And, to be perfectly honest, sometimes the distance that living temporarily in Hartford provides is welcome. There is an escape from worry, from grief, from facing the inevitable, as I concentrate on doing my job. Losing myself in my work, in getting to know the actors I am coaching, in attending to the task at hand, is a much appreciated respite.

I’m so grateful that Don is here taking care of Scout, keeping the drips going in the taps as the temperatures go well below freezing, watching over the house, salting the driveway, all the things that need to be done. But especially taking care of our girl.

I am reminded, when I am in Hartford, of my last stay there when Scout was with me. When she was still able to enjoy a walk in the park, when she loved meeting lots of people and dogs, when she magically galloped under the glow of the lamps in the park with a power that astonished me. Lovely and precious memories, though bittersweet. There’s no way I could have her there with me now.

Anyway. It’s lovely being home. It will be lovely to back in Hartford as well. And there you go.

See you back in Hartford.

Happy Monday.

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Strange Snow

January 24, 2016 at 9:26 am by Claudia

1-24 snow in park

What a strange storm this was. So many areas of the East have been hit with huge amounts of snow. Others have very little accumulation. As it was, the snow didn’t start falling here until mid-to-late afternoon, much later than predicted. I was able to get to the library and back with no snow except for the occasional flake. The museum, where I planned on spending a few hours, had to decided to close, surely thinking the snow would start falling much earlier than it did.

By the time it started to come down heavily, it had become very windy. Instead of partaking, I stayed inside.

Don had stocked up on food and supplies. He also ran to buy some coffee yesterday morning, after having woken up in the middle of the night with the realization that he had none on hand. He waited all day for the snow to start falling.

No snow. Not one bit. The cottage remains snow-free.

I, having found out late in the day that I didn’t have to be at rehearsal today, realized I could have driven home yesterday. But really, who knew? I expected that the snow would start any minute, as did Don. And I sure didn’t want to be caught in a snowstorm while driving home. Better safe than sorry.

Mother Nature is only so predictable, right? She likes to keep us guessing.

So I spent a cozy day in the apartment and sat out the storm. We had about 4 or 5 inches of snow here, not all that much. I watched figure skating on the tube, I crocheted. (New scarf in the shop, by the way.) I read. I ate. I talked to Don on the phone.

1-24 snowyviewfromwindow

Taken from the apartment window. I do love the sight of snow falling in the glow of city lights. And I sure like not having to shovel!

So. Today, I’m headed home. I’m not sure when. I’m going to wait until the sun has a been out a while and the roads are clearer than they are at the moment. I’ll come back Monday or Tuesday, depending on what the rehearsal call for Tuesday is. I don’t like coming back at the last minute.

I’m going to do my best to relieve Don of his Scout Duties while I’m there. He needs a bit of a break.

I hope those of you who were caught in the worst of this storm take it easy – don’t overdo. It’s Sunday. Relax and shovel a bit at a time. Have hot chocolate. Watch a movie.

Happy Sunday.

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Waiting

January 23, 2016 at 8:16 am by Claudia

I have had two restless nights of sleep in a row. I’ve slept, it’s not a case of sleeplessness, but my goodness, the dreams, and the waking up and the going back to sleep and the waking up…

Yesterday, my last dream before I woke up was one in which Scout had run away and I didn’t know until I came home and lots of people were there but no one was looking for her. I couldn’t believe it. Then someone told me the Girl Scouts were out looking for her, and I screamed at them that I was the only one who would know where to look. Unsettling, to say the least.

This morning, more dreams that, after two cups of coffee, I can’t remember. But it seems like the last two, no, make that three, nights have been filled with dreams where everyone I’ve ever known has made an appearance.

Enough already.

1-23 colorstoryfilter

I call this Waiting for the Snow. I took it early this morning and posted it on Instagram, but then I played around with some filters on a new app I downloaded called A Color Story. I don’t usually do a lot with filters, but I must say it’s sort of fun. Of course, I can’t remember what filter I used, but it intensified everything in this shot.

I’ve been up since 5:30. It’s now almost 8 and the snow hasn’t started falling yet. But I could sure feel it in the air yesterday as I walked home from rehearsal. Even if I hadn’t been aware of the forecast, I would have known that snow was headed our way.

I’m not called for any work today. I’d head home, but I might be called tomorrow. So I have to stay put. I guess I’ll take a walk when it begins to snow, as long as it isn’t too windy.

1-23 kindle

I gave up on the Cara Black mystery – for a couple of reasons. I opened the book to find it had been damaged by some previous reader. The pages were warped, there were stains, and it was irritating. (The library had noted the damage on the inside cover.) And I also quickly realized that I didn’t want to jump ahead to the newest book in the series, in which the protagonist is now a single mother, without knowing how she got there. So, I put it down. I’ll return it to the library.

Out came the Kindle, where I immediately dug into the other Jane Casey I had downloaded, The Stranger You Know. After I finish this one, I believe I will be all caught up and ready for her newest, whenever that comes out.

Right now, they’re predicting 5-9 inches of snow for this area, with an additional 1-3 inches tonight, which isn’t great, but is certainly much, much less than other areas of the East Coast. It’s supposed to stop by tomorrow morning, so by the time I want to head home, it might be clear enough to make the trip. Might. Again…fingers crossed.

1-23 yarn

Yes, I’m back to crocheting, but slowly, because my hands get sore after having made so many scarves last November and December. This one is almost finished and will go in the Etsy shop. Three more have to be made that are special requests. And then I’m done. For a long time.

If you’re at all interested, keep your eyes peeled on the Etsy widget in my sidebar. This is the only scarf that I will list for general sale. (The colors are a bit darker than they appear to be in this photo. But not much; it’s a really lovely colorway.)

Stay safe. Stay warm.

Happy Saturday.

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Between

Strange Snow

Waiting

Lambs Like to Party

A Note

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