Around 5:00 yesterday afternoon, my niece sent a text to me with this photo:
I cannot tell you how happy this made me! That’s Christy, who pays Anastasia, on the left and my great-niece, Vivi, on the right. (Vivi is my late brother’s granddaughter.)
Doesn’t Vivi look like she is going to burst with happiness?
I had arranged everything with Christy and her assistant but since I wasn’t actually there, I was nervous that somehow they wouldn’t get through the stage door, that something would go wrong. So I was sitting here in the den, watching the clock, hoping that I’d hear from Liz, my niece. When this came through, I relaxed. Liz said that Vivi was ‘starstruck’ and that they had the most wonderful time, loved the show and even got a tour of the backstage area. A big thank you to Christy and Chandalae, her assistant.
Anastasia is such a wonderful show, full of rich, gorgeous music that hearkens back to the glorious music of Rodgers and Hammerstein. That’s one of the reasons I love it so much. I’m not a fan of musicals with a ‘pop’ sound, where one tune morphs into another and are virtually indistinguishable from each other. (Exception: Hamilton, which is brilliant and so much more than rap/pop music.) So, Anastasia is a musical in the traditional vein and a family musical, at that. That’s why I didn’t expect it to be nominated for many, if any, Tony awards. The Tonys tend to go for cutting-edge, fresh musicals, which is fine. The exception this year is Hello Dolly with Bette Midler, but she is a force of nature and she was absolutely born to play that role.
I was disappointed that Christy wasn’t nominated, because I believe she should have been, but I’m thrilled Mary Beth Peil was nominated for her role as the Dowager Empress. She is extraordinary. She once said to me, in a written response to a note I gave her, “You who can hear the grass grow – I love it!” (My job is all about listening.) That made me so happy that I have it printed out on my bulletin board. Her performance is elegant, touching and lyrical and I do so hope she wins.
I’m also thrilled that Linda Cho was nominated for her exquisite costume design. There were a lot of new musicals this year and it was very competitive, but from simply reading about each one, I could have predicted the nominees and pretty much did.
Then there’s Escape to Margaritaville, the Jimmy Buffett musical that Don is in – the audience sings along with the Buffett songs, comes up on stage at times, cheers, talks back – as Don says, “It’s a party!” Two completely different musicals!
Change of subject:
Bridal Veil spirea.
Sweet white violets that I found in the side garden bed.
Editorial comment (my conflicted opinion and my opinion only): I read a wonderful essay by Anne Lamott on why she doesn’t go for the whole Mother’s Day thing (and she’s a mom) and she echoed a conversation that Don and I had just the day before. While I honor mothers, including my own, I do think that many people have complex reactions to Mother’s Day, because not every maternal relationship is Hallmark card worthy. The “Day” can evoke sadness at the loss of a parent, estrangement from a parent, the loss of a child, the inability to conceive, not ever knowing one’s mother, or having a mother who should never have been one. I’m conflicted about this sort of day. I always called my mom on Mother’s Day, of course, because I loved her and I knew it meant a great deal to her to hear from me on that day. But as a daughter, every day should be a day I honor my mom, right? I received the most beautiful card from my sister for Mother’s Day and it made me cry. And this morning, Little Z sent me a video message saying “Happy Mother’s Day.” I melted. Let me add that I honor my sister on this day because she is an incredible mother to her three sons. But I honor her every day. So…conflicted.
I won’t go into the whole “you’ve never known what it is to love until you’ve had a child” thing. Please. Love is love is love is love is love.
Same for Valentine’s Day. Too much pressure for those who, for a variety of reasons, feel sadness on that day. And again, Don and I say “I love you” to each other countless times a day. We don’t need a special day to acknowledge our love for each other. In fact, we sort of make it a practice not to do anything special on that day – but that’s just us.
I’m not meaning to rain on anyone’s parade, I’m just being honest about my conflicted feelings on what I call “Hallmark” holidays. I miss my mother. I miss being a mom to my dogs. But I feel that every day and it has absolutely nothing to do with Mother’s Day.
Nevertheless, I do wish all of you moms a Happy Mother’s Day because I want to take a moment on this day to acknowledge you. And if on this day, you are showered with presents or a beautiful brunch or simply a hug and a thank you, that makes me very happy. But if you’re feeling blue on this day, know that you are loved, as well.
Happy Sunday.
Claudia,
I couldn’t agree with you more. I am a mother to three lovely human beings, youngest is a senior in high school next year, and we love each other EVERY day. I don’t like the pressure the calendar puts on them to do something even MORE for me. Same for Valentines Day. I’ve been married to my high school sweetheart for 26 years this past Friday and we love and cherish each other every day. We have written Valentines Day off of our list. Not that it’s bad, it’s a beautiful day, just don’t like the pressure it. I want people to love me every day, not just on that one scheduled day. You’re so right. Love is love is love is love is love. Thank you for such beautiful, meaningful posts.
You are very welcome, Brooke!
I also agree with you, Claudia. However, I also believe that some people need a “special” day to pay the sort of respect, love, and acknowledgement that may be difficult for them to express every day. These occasions allow people who are generally reticent about expressing emotion to have an excuse to show their loved ones how they feel. Now, mind you, I think it’s terrible that some people need the excuse, but at least it’s there. I’m grilled for your great-niece! I love young people who aren’t jaded by life, or think it’s cool to be jaded, and who can experience moments like meeting a Broadway star and embrace the coolness of that!
Yes, good point. If someone who normally doesn’t acknowledge that (which is sad in and of itself) needs a day, then I hope they take that day to acknowledge their mom or sweetheart or father.
I ditto agree with you. love is love is love. And I forgot to call Mum last night (when it was already Sunday in Australia, oops.) But it’s still Sunday here so hopefully it still counts.
When are the Tonys this year? I hope I haven’t missed them! (going to search for it now).
They must be soon as there were several articles in today’s NY Times about them. Usually first Sunday in June, but maybe earlier?
Yeah…I agree with you…Mother’s Day…like Father’s Day, or Valentine’s Day….are made up days. We should definitely tell our loved ones as often as we can how we feel…express our love and say our thank you’s….but we don’t always do that. Today, I just want my hugs from 2 sons here…in 3 weeks I get a hug from London son…woohoo! All will be well in my world. We have 2 more things to plant…then we’ll be done. Enjoy your day…love is love is love! ;)
So glad that London son is coming soon!
Shhhhh….we are going to Isle of Man for family reunion! Shhhh! I am so excited! ;)
Oh, I think you mentioned that a while back! Even better!
I sort of agree, but still it is nice to get flowers and phone call on Mother’s Day. Then in my case a trip to Brimfield with the my girls to shop is fun day out. I saw Don’s play has been extended until July now. More time to miss him, glad the play is a success. I am getting a bit soggy here all this rain still today. I hear the sun will be returning this week!@
Of course – any time we get flowers and phone call is good! I just heard that the musical was extended yesterday! We thought it would be. Yes, the sun is returning with a vengeance – it will be in the eighties on a couple of days!
For many years I didn’t get it, and shame on me for the pressure I put on my son because of it. I wanted the entire day to be about me. Dumb. I even expected him to stop studying for college finals to drive an hour and a half home to spend the day with me. Talk about selfish. However, now I place no demands on him. He always takes me to dinner when I am in the city, and time with him is what I appreciate most of all. On the 24th of this month he is taking me to see Neal Diamond!! He says I am giddy. Maybe I am, but part of it is because he is taking me.
I think the name of the day should be changed to “Womens Day”. To celebrate womankind. The woman who originally thought up this day was abolitionist, and was the poet who wrote “Battle Hymn of the Republic”, she fought for her cause and President Woodrow Wilson made it a national holiday. Hallmark and those like Hallmark are the ones that have commercialized the day. As they do with most holidays.
Yay! Neil Diamond! You’ll have a wonderful time and what a lovely gesture from your son!
Hi, I totally agree about Mother’s Day. Heck, even the woman who created it grew to hate the commercialization and fought to have it abolished. My antipathy towards it began once I actually became one. Back then it was always about what my mother and mother-in-law wanted to do: the buffet in the hotel ballroom that, if not for Mother’s Day would have sat empty. I dreaded it every year as would any mother of small children who had absolutely no interest in eating, or even sitting still. Nowadays I make a point of letting my mom know, day in and day out, how I feel about her and, I’m happy to say, my boys are the same way. Mother’s and Valentine’s days are probably Hallmark’s biggest moneymakers. Not for long though. Millennials do not buy greeting cards.
Yes, because everything seems to get commercialized. And that’s sad.
I didn’t think about that – millennials don’t buy greeting cards!
I couldn’t agree with you more on these Hallmark holiday’s. I love my mom every day whether its Mother’s day or not the same goes for my husband on Valentine’s day….I don’t need someone to tell me when it’s okay to thank them or love them as your sooo correct in saying love is love is love. As for musicals I grew up listening to my mom’s 38’s (at least I think that’s what the larger of the two records were) of all the big musicals. My favorite was and still is South Pacific. We had Richard Rogers daughter (and her husband who has since passed away) to our wedding it was quite the honor at the time, but then again she’s just as real as you and I and I don’t like putting people on pedestals as I knew her way before I actually met her and knew who she was and thought differently about her at the time (okay off topic). Glad your great-niece had a blast as you can see it in her expression. Wishing you all the best whatever day it may be:-)
I grew up listening to South Pacific, as well. It’s still one of my favorite musicals.
So neat that you knew Mary Rodgers – She wrote Once Upon a Mattress which is one of my favorite musicals (Starred in it many, many years ago.) She passed away a few years ago. Her son (Adam Guettel) is also a composer and an excellent one. I worked on a show he wrote the music for – Floyd Collins.
Nope, not Mary….Linda Rodgers Emory, haven’t seen her in years, but she’s a very strong woman and quite the spit fire. Not sure how involved Linda is or was in her dad’s musicals when he was alive or now for that matter. As I am writing this I looked her up online and am saddened to find out she passed as well. She battled Cancer for a long time and helped with my husband’s mom when she developed Cancer, so sad. Damn that big “C”:’-(
Oh, of course! My mistake- I forgot that there were two daughters! Seems like Linda kept a lower profile? I’m so sorry to hear that she is gone. I didn’t know that.
Happy Mother’s day to you!
This is my first without my Mom.
She was amazing & I loved & appreciated her every day.
I agree with you here but evidently some need a designated set aside day & that’s ok too.
Peace!
The first is hard – I know. Thinking of you as you weather this first Mother’s Day without her.
Happy Mother’s Day to you Claudia. You certainly have been an awesome mother to all of your precious babies. I am with you in that I honored my Mom every day of the year and I did make a big deal out of Mother’s Day for her. She was undoubtely one of the most loving and precious Mothers on this earth. Some holidays are so hard when you’ve lost your loved ones.
Don’s musical sounds like a blast. A new Margaritaville just opened here in Tulsa at one of the casinos. I love his music.
Have a great day and week.
Judy
It is a blast, according to Don. Every audience is different – some are raucous, some are quieter. You never know!
Amen, Claudia, mothers should be honored and loved daily!
Hope you’re having a great day, Nancy!
Thank you Claudia for expressing exactly how I feel about this day. It is a Hallmark day for sure. I have two grown kids and I know that they will be there for me wherever and whenever I need them but I don’t like Mothers day. Instead of saying yes, I deserve it I tend to go over in my mind the things I could have done so much better and it makes me sad. Thank you for the opportunity to share that with you.
So sweet that you heard from Z !
Hope you have a pleasant enjoyable day.
sue
I love that Z – made my day!
No big celebrations around here, either. We are also not lovers of “Hallmark Holidays”. I spent most of this rainy Sunday puttering in the kitchen.
Your white violets are so pretty.
I’m sure you’ve seen the cast pictures from Escape to Margaritaville, but maybe your readers would like to see your guy on the beach with fellow cast members here:
http://www.nbcsandiego.com/multimedia/Photos-Cast-of-La-Jolla-Playhouses-Escape-to-Margaritaville-420847633.html
Looks like he’s having a good time!
I remember when they did that shoot, it was not long after he arrived. I would like to be on that beach right now!
I could not agree more, Claudia.
My feelings for my departed Mom have never changed. She will always be in my heart. No one day of the year will change those feelings.
When it comes to my children and grands..every day is Mom’s day as they are important in my life 365 days out of the year. We have made it a point to not exchange “gifts” on these days, rather give a bit more to a charity of our choice. Phone calls and a good home cooked meal with lots of laughs means more than any present they could give.
Hope all is well with you. Don’s experience sounds like fun!!
Lots of laughs are the best present of all!
My son and I say “I love you” to each other every day….we don’t need a special day to do it!
Exactly!
Your sweet little grandniece does look like she is ready to burst with happiness.
Also wanted to say your sentiments about Mother’s day are lovely. We all deserve to be loved and kissed and hugged everyday of the year.
I love the expression on her face – perfect!
Oh, Claudia. It’s really late, like after midnight here. I’ve had a rough few days for a variety of reasons. I was very, very blue today; and I mean, some real crying jags. My husband tried to talk it out with me but it didn’t help one bit. I even, very bright-voiced and positively, reached out to someone early on Sunday morning who I know as a really good mom; wished her a happy day. Tried to get more upbeat.
We went to the grocery store Saturday evening and I actually said to my husband, “If one more person says ‘Happy Mother’s Day’ to me, I’ll puke.” And I meant it. (I’m not a mother or grandmother and I don’t have a mother.) Then, Sunday afternoon, the final straw – – when a nice little boy in the neighborhood, walking his dog, called out to me as I was getting in my car ‘to escape’: “Happy Mother’s Day, Vicki!” Bless his heart for being polite and sweet but, OMG, it hit me all wrong.
Your post today pretty much summed up a lot of what I’ve been feeling, in your usual perfect way. I’m just so on edge with what’s in the news, other things happening in my life; my surroundings are being changed by neighbors on the side of me and neighbors in the back; I feel like I’m getting slammed against a wall. I’m trying to dial down the melodrama; trying…
Remembering how I felt the other day when at a medical clinic, encountering a mother with a small child in her arms, wondering what Mother’s Day would mean to her. She was a young mother, maybe mid-20s. Upon closer look, the child was probably older than I thought; maybe age 4 or so. The mom had a frozen-fear face; so somber. So understandably somber…because the child was I think very ill; pale, no hair (probably a cancer patient); so weak. We expect to see children running around, talking; animated. And this child was so still, except for tentatively reaching up an arm to stroke her mother’s long braid. Faintly whimpering under a blanket at times. I felt my heart would crack in two. I’ve been choking back a lot of tears for days but it was all I could do to reach over and touch this young mom’s arm to say, “I’m so sorry you and your little girl are having to go through this…” but I didn’t; it wouldn’t have been my place. I just keep talking to myself to get out of my own head and remember what other people endure.
But, yeah, the bottom line. These ‘marker’ holidays, so heavily touted, might be so fun for a majority of people, but certainly not for others. And I can remember when I was young with the world stretching out in front of me, celebrating Mother’s Day for my own mom (I was recalling a one-time event when, as a family [my first family], we took her to Mother’s Day brunch at The Biltmore; wow; posh, for us!), and I wouldn’t want to take that specialness away from people and their families, not ever.
But, yes. I too am conflicted; yes, for some of us, conflicted. What you said here today made me feel less alone in how I feel, so…as always…thank you, Claudia.
Hang in there, Vicki – thinking of you. xo
What a good time your niece and great niece had! Christy seems like such a lovely young woman! Don’t musical sounds like so much fun. I totally understand ‘Hallmark’ holidays. It does put pressure on so many. I don’t ever expect anything and if I get a call or card it’s sweet, but I know my girls love me everyday! Annie Belle was clueless it was a holiday, she just wanted her canned food and some snuggles and that was perfect. Mom and I did get a little surprise visit from Sara, Blake, Tiger and Scout and that was a joy. I thought of my brother and how much we missed talking to him. Hugs!
Christy is one of the loveliest people I’ve ever known. She is kind and humble and funny, yet strong. I couldn’t love her more.
I saw your present from the grands on FB – so lovely!