I’m wondering why, in all the ridiculous hoopla over Miley Cyrus’ performance at the VMA awards (which I didn’t watch,) Robin Thicke’s performance isn’t being measured by the same ruler. After all, he was a part of the whole thing and he’s married and a father. I get real tired of double standards.
I’m wondering why the media covered the above performance like it was the most important thing in the world when the Fukishima Nuclear Reactor in Japan, site of nuclear meltdowns caused by an earthquake, is leaking 300 tons of contaminated water a day into the Pacific Ocean. Why are we not more alarmed by this?
Or why the media spends inordinate amounts of time on who’s tweeting who and what’s trending (also a twitter thing) but doesn’t really spend much time on our melting Polar Ice Cap or any one of a number of pressing social issues that need to be addressed.
In that same vein, why do any or us care for one millisecond about the Kardashians? Where are our priorities? What do we value?
I’m wondering why I see more and more females (and males) in the entertainment and news industry with cheek implants, face lifts, botoxed and re-botoxed faces. Why do we hold those in the public eye to impossibly youthful standards? It’s not natural. It looks absurd. It’s getting to the point where, if I see an aging actress who hasn’t had work done, I shout out loud because I’m so excited. Because that’s the exception, rather than the rule. This obsession with youth seems especially prevalent in the United States. I have to watch a foreign film to see an actress who is aging gracefully and honestly. Each time I see someone in the public eye who has succumbed to that false standard for beauty and has had work done, I sigh in disappointment. “Not you, too!”
I’m wondering why television series have impossibly youthful and beautiful actors playing FBI agents, CSI investigators, doctors and nurses and detectives. I won’t watch them because, to me, they are simply laughable. Stop it. Again, I have to watch something from another country to see character actors playing those roles – character actors with interesting faces that show a life lived. That have lines and wrinkles and large-ish noses and less than perfect complexions and greying hair. Read my lips: I don’t buy all these young, pretty faces in roles that require some gravitas, some depth of experience. Stop it.
I’m wondering why the media and advertisers constantly cater to the 30 – 40 something set. It’s as if those of us who are older than that don’t exist, except to buy Depends or Ensure or fall prey to warnings to buy this or that medicine from pharmaceutical companies. I even see it in the advertising possibilities for my blog. No, I’m not a mommy blogger or even a forty-something. I am, however, smart and experienced and savvy and hip and I’m a consumer.Β Pay attention. Or as Linda Loman says in Death of a Salesman, “Attention must be paid.” Stop catering to one age demographic. Stop generalizing about everyone in a certain age range. We aren’t all alike. We aren’t a mass of people who seemingly have lost any capacity for desire or enthusiasm or passion or knowledge or humor or vigor. Just stop it.
On that note, let me point you to a site I discovered. Of course, it comes from another country. It’s called The Amazings – Craft and Wisdom from Amazing Elders. There should be more of this sort of thing out there, especially in this country.
Happy Thursday.
Carolyn says
Well said.
Claudia says
Thanks, Carolyn.
patty says
Very good points, Claudia. I’m with you on all of it.
Claudia says
Thanks, Patty.
Melanie says
Amen! You should write articles for the Huffington Post. :-)
I don’t even know who the Kardashians are….I mean, I’ve heard of them. But I can’t tell you why they’re famous or anything about them. You know why? Because I don’t care! I don’t read magazines such as People, Us, etc.
Thanks for the link – I bookmarked it so I can look at it in-depth later when I have a bit more time.
Claudia says
You’ll enjoy that site, Melanie.
Dawn says
My hubby was upset last night, all he wanted was to see was what was going on in Sierra but it was impossible. All the other crap that was on the new came first. I think if we are planning on bombing a country that we have no business being part of it should be news worthy. I get disgusted when watch tv everyone my age is think and beautiful and that’s not real life:( but it sure makes you take a look at yourself in the mirror and get a good laugh.
Claudia says
I agree – where is the priority in terms of the news? Things are really skewed.
Vera says
Oh Claudia! I am so on the same bandwagon. I almost never watch TV because I can’t stand American TV. There is nothing good, it’s all boring and unimportant. I do watch Masterpiece Theatre and some other shows occasionally. I will be turning 60 (YAY!!) in a couple of weeks and am proud of my wrinkles and the grey coming into my hair. It’s me…it’s who I am. Why would I want to look (or, rather, attempt to look) like someone I am not? Thanks for the link…I took a quick peek and will check it out in further detail later. Looks like fun.
Claudia says
I’ve never colored my hair and (most of the time) I love my gray hair!
missy says
I’m with you…If we had any values , the world would be in a much better place…Starting with the media including TV..Don’t get me started…
Claudia says
I know Missy, I know!
RenΓ©e says
Hooray! Well said, Claudia. I’m 55 and have let my white/gray hair show….I’m sick to the teeth of all the over 50s who are now blonde…goes well with the black brows. I receive compliments on my hair wherever I go. The women wearing so much makeup they look like they are wearing kabuki masks….I refuse. Why are we so obsessed with being young? Because people are afraid to grow old…people are afraid of the ‘consequence’ of what happens at the end. But let’s face it, none of us get out of this alive, and we need to live each of our years rather than focus on the end game.
Claudia says
There’s a ridiculous amount of pressure to look young. Makes me angry!
Paula says
I am also upset by the events in Syria and Egypt, but unless you listen to NPR and watch PBS, everything is fluff.
By the way, the Amazing Elders is amazing!
(so are you)
Claudia says
What is happening in Syria and Egypt is extremely troublesome and the lack of depth in reporting on those situations is appalling.
nancy says
Again, Amen!
I am so tired of all of the superficial hype and shallow substance we see everywhere on television.
I am tired of seeing news anchors and women on TV wearing low cut dresses, exposing more than any professional woman needs to show. What happened to professional standards?
I am tired of seeing elderly people represented as bumbling fools. They have wisdom, experience and class, compared to what I see in all forms of media.
Why do young people look to the Kardashians, and their ilk as role models?
I can’t help but imagine what a generation of future senior citizens will look like, with wrinkle-covered tattoos. ; )
Great, thought provoking, subject!
nancyr
Claudia says
Oh, I know! Entirely inappropriate attire for a news anchor or reporter or meteorologist!
I will never get a tattoo. First of all, I don’t like them. Secondly, who wants to see a sagging tattoo? These people are going to be shocked one day when everything wrinkles and shifts!!!
Janet in Rochester says
You’ve got THAT right! What looks nice at 20 looks VERY different at 60, 70 and beyond!
Elizabeth says
A quick quiet drive to the food store this morning had me wondering about the same ideas you are writing about today. Imagine my surprise when I read your post and realized we are thinking the same thoughts! I am outraged about Syria and the deaths of so many innocent human beings. It makes me so sad to see this kind of atrocity. I watch the BBC news once a day, usually after supper. They have such thorough coverage of the topics that are important. Very informative station.
The Miley Cyrus thing has my head spinning. What a sad day when people get away with such as this.
I have done as Renee has and let my hair go gray. It’s been 8 full months now and the salt & pepper is getting more salty every day. I love the freedom of not having to do lots of maintenance. My husband actually likes how it looks and we both think it is thicker. Lots of compliments, which is very nice. It makes me realize I did the right thing even if it was a bit traumatic at first. I will never consider going back to coloring.
Cloudy and muggy here, so ready for autumn…..
Claudia says
I’m salt and peppery, too, Elizabeth, and I embrace it.
The BBC news puts our news to shame.
Debby Messner says
I so agree with all your comments. Yeah for Renee letting her hair go natural. I colored mine for many years. I started getting gray in my 20’s. I look at those in their 50 and plus with the blonde hair and think to myself……they aren’t fooling anyone. It does bother me when someone thinks I am older than I am, because I am already old, hah. Why is everyone obsessed with being young forever.
I so agree about the Miley thing. Robin looked like he was in the “thick” of things for sure. He didn’t seem to mind. I wondered what his wife thought. I didn’t watch the show, can’t help seeing the reruns. I don’t like the awards shows. It’s all about the look instead of the talent.
But I do have to laugh at myself. I don’t usually wear any makeup. Then there is the clown side of me……crazy hair and makeup. But I have stopped wearing a wig and changes my clown name to Grammy Petals.
Hope this week goes well for you. So busy. Soon you will be home again. (((((HUGS))))
Claudia says
Yay for gray hair!
I don’t understand why Robin Thicke isn’t being taken to task for the lyrics he sang and for his questionable appearance with Ms. Cyrus.
Janet in Rochester says
Sad to say in this day and age but it certainly looks as though there’s still VERY much of a double standard in this country…
Claudia says
Yes, I fear there is.
Gail Hunt says
Once again, I am in total agreement with you, Claudia. On the rare occasion I watch a TV show or movie that features real people in the main roles of lovers, I cheer and take notice. Our demographic needs to get vocal.
But, I have to say the older grey-haired woman can sometimes enjoy a quiet, ignored presence, observing and learning.
Claudia says
True, true.
Gayla Pappenfoht says
Media manipulates, that is for sure. My younger mommy friends are up in arms because they allowed themselves to believe Miss Montanna was a perky, cheery little thing they could share with their pretty little daughters. I understand their sadness. They gave money to this girl, however odd that seems, to create a modern aura of wholesome? Fun… I don’t have to have done that or even agreed with it… To get why they are so angry.
If you had watched the clip on Youtube, you might see why she is getting the flack… She was sickening… It was disturbing. What was more disturbing? The crowd, although visibly turned off, clapped. Where is the good, old fashioned “boo!”?????? Lol
On all other fronts, I’m with you, for what that is worth! Great blog and wonderful post. I’m glad to find you!
Claudia says
You misunderstand me, I think. I’m not defending what she did at all. I find it very disturbing. I’m merely saying that Mr. Thicke should also be taken to task if we’re on an even playing field, and we should be.
Also, it must be said, that what she wants is attention. And everyone who is constantly publicizing it is playing right into her hands.
Bonnie Schulte says
I agree with everything you have said..coming from
someone who is 73. I too, say STOP IT!
Claudia says
Right on, Bonnie!
Chris k in Wisconsin says
Amen. That young *lady* has been pushing the envelope for about 3 years now… inching her way up the ridiculous scale. And each of those episodes was documented and watched/ analyzed/ re-watched over those years. What shocks ME is that people seem to be shocked about it. Seriously?? If she had come out on stage in jeans and a T-shirt, sang her song and exited the stage,,, now THAT would have been shocking!! :-)
Claudia says
She wants publicity, Chris, and she’s getting it.
Julie says
I totally get what you are saying. I see it happening even in Canadian TV now and everyone used to be real – not just young and pretty. I often try to watch British shows as they showcase real actors, they actually eat and drink when they are in a restaurant! And don’t even get me started on reality TV…
The Amazings are great. One of my friends has taken a course through them. I’d like to take a felting one.
Claudia says
Oh lord, Reality TV – not reality, totally staged. And rather appalling, I think.
GinaE says
Couldn’t agree more here. I will never understand the “trash” TV that is not only so popular, but makes it in to what should be news as well. I don’t care about the Kardashians, the repulsive Duck Dynasty men, or watching people without their clothes in some fake survival show. I do care about all the topics you mentioned.
Claudia says
I agree, Gina!
Linda @ Itsy Bits And Pieces says
I hear you, Claudia! Amen to that great rant!
Claudia says
Thanks, Linda!
Kathy says
Claudia, I couldn’t agree with you more. I feel, as a 60 year old female, like an invisible person in this country. If you’re not young, thin, and “beautiful” you don’t count for much. Don’t we spend money too? How about advertising geared to our age group! I don’t understand the whole plastic surgery, botox, boob jobs, etc. thing. What’s wrong with lines, wrinkles, grey hair and curves? I recently decided that I was going to stop having my hair colored and just let it be grey. I told my 13 year old granddaughter I was going to just celebrate my inner hippie! She thinks that’s really cool and has promised to braid my hair when it gets long enough! There are so many more important things in the world to worry about.
Claudia says
Good for you, Kathy! I’m 60, too. I am what I am – and my hair is a mixture of gray and brown. So be it.
I read somewhere that our age group, our demographic, has more disposable income. If that’s the case, why aren’t we being treated like vital consumers? I don’t get it. I’m sick of the invisible mentality this country has.
Regena Fickes says
I must admit that in my 20’s I tried to fit in. That changed 45 years ago and I have never looked back. The very things for which I was chastized in my childhood are my strongest points now. I never did fit in and never really wanted to do so. I could care less about Miley Cyrus or Robin Thicke. I care that genocide is prevelant in so many countries, kindness is so rare, “live and let live” is no longer in most vocabularies. Thank you, Claudia. You “rant” for a great many others. I tell those who mention that I am 65 (including my doctor, whom I only see when really necessary) and aging “If God allows you to live to be my age, you too shall grow old”. Faces which reflect a live lived, sorrows borne and joys celebrated are far more beautiful than the vapid, empty faces of the “young” in the media. God preseve us.
Claudia says
Beautifully said, Regena.
Betsy says
Hip Hip Hooray Claudia! I’ve been saying this for several years. When did the morning news shows become morning “Entertainment Tonight” shows? I’m sick to death of all of this. The world is in chaos. Who cares about all of these actors and actresses? They are PEOPLE. Just like you. Just like me. Why are they so important? Acting is their job. Just like athletes play games for a living. These people are not special people. Why not kneel down to the man who picks up our garbage every week? Now that is someone we would miss very much if he wasn’t there. On the other hand, I don’t care a whit about all of these so-called famous people. The only reason I’m even writing this is the same frustration you have. We have important issues to deal with and can find no credible reporting on them.
Okay. I’m off my soapbox now. Thanks for the opportunity to vent. I believe my blood pressure may have just lowered a notch or two! :-)
Blessings,
Betsy
Claudia says
I enjoyed what you had to say on your soapbox, Betsy. Thank you for your wise words!
Belinda says
Thank you Claudia for your post. I am in the 40 something group and I agree with you comletely. Our media coverage has gone beyond absurd these days. There are wars going on, animals dying each day and being abused, people starving and living homeless, our environment it being destroyed therefore destroying our earth, our water source in America is being poisoned along with our food sources, women’s rights are being taken away by politicians, racism exists STILL in our world, gun control is OUT OF CONTROL…I could go on and on. And amongst all that I’ve mentioned and more the media finds it necessary to make the VMA’s a top news story.
It sickens me as to how Miley is the one taking all of the flack as you stated. Nothing is being said about Robin and his performance. That is certainly a double standard! And I’m sorry, any mother that has been allowing Miley Cyrus to be an example to their daughter and not being the example themselves has no right to be upset by her performance.
My husband and I are avid sports fans and that’s about all that we watch on television these days aside from a few select shows. Certainly not any of the reality shows….Duck Dynasty? Are you kidding me?!
Anyway I’ll get off my own soapbox. Just know that there are some of us in the 30-40 something group that agrees with you! Have a blessed day.
Nancy Blue Moon says
You are so right Belinda..these mothers need to be the best examples to their daughters..and not rely on a TV child to do it..
Claudia says
Bravo, Belinda! Thank you. You said it better than I.
Janet in Rochester says
Perfectly-said, Claudia! As you have done MANY times before, you echo my own feelings exactly! If only YOU ruled the world! Keep writing, my friend… :>)
Claudia says
If only! Thank you, Janet!
Nancy Blue Moon says
I must also say “AMEN” to your post Claudia..That’s why it is so refreshing to know there are people like you and Don who are in “show business” and are nice, normal, down to earth people who have the same every day ups & downs that the rest of us go through..Also I am tired of turning on my local news and having to hear about what “those” ridiculous people are doing to get attention today..If I had to do the things they do to make money..I will remain broke thank you..Great post Claudia..I love the way you make us all stop and think about these things sometimes..
Claudia says
I have no desire to be in the spotlight, Nancy! Neither does Don. We just want to do our work. There are a lot of us ‘show business types’ who are normal and down to earth. Thank goodness!
Teresa says
I also have to laugh at the young detectives, etc. They dress in low cut outfits and high heels. I mean how many medical examiners would wear expensive desiner clothes and high heels to a crime scene! Yeah lets walk through blood, etc with $500.00 pumps! I always say to Jeff “the real professionals must just crack up when they see these shows”. Women have enough to prove without looking like a fashion model, as they do on these shows. I think that detectives have to earn their way before they get these jobs. It takes them years, at least most of the time. I am 57 and I sometimes wonder if I will ever see equality at our jobs. I see this at work also. The guys in my dept don’t have to do the quality of work that the women do. Our new boss (male) seems to see this, but says that it will take awhile to turn around as they have been getting away with this for years. But as much as there has been a boss turn around since this company running our dept has come in it probably won’t happen. He will probably be gone before then. But at least he seems to know what we are talking about. Maybe some day things will get better (and it has looking back at history) but everything has to be fought for. I don’t know why everyone tries to look younger. What happened to aging gracefully? O.k. I think I got off subject somewhat here.
Claudia says
I so hope that there is eventually equality on the work front, Teresa. The sad thing is that we have to fight so hard for it. Why isn’t it a given?
Laura says
AMEN!!!! I go on a rant about this at least once a week. It is one of the reasons my TV isn’t turned on too often. xo Laura
Claudia says
Same here, Laura!
Kim says
I couldn’t agree more, you hit it right on the head. I pretty much only watch british tv. The characters are real, Men and women are allowed to use their age and wisdom to an advantage and it’s really just more believable. Great post!
Claudia says
Thanks, Kim.
SueZK says
You could not have hit the nail more precisely directly on the head. Give me a natural Anthony Hopkins anyday and I will be happy.
Claudia says
Me too, Sue!
Laura says
We wonder about the very same things!
Claudia says
Good to know that I’m not the only one. Not that I ever doubted it!
Suzan says
Hope you’re watching Broadchurch then on BBC..so refreshing
Claudia says
I don’t get BBC here, so I’ll have to play catch up on that one.
sharron says
You said it so well!
Our society is so vulgar and the news is not really news anymore!
I watch many foreign shows BBc etc as they are more “Real”!
Claudia says
I agree, Sharron.
Sondra says
I’m sick of Miley Cyrus and her outrageous behavior, reality shows, actors with blindingly white teeth, inappropriate clothing for supposed professionals on shows, TV demographics, the list could go on and on. Right now I’m upset because my favorite TV show – Longmire – probably won’t be renewed because A&E is changing programming to attract a younger demographic. That said, we do watch a lot of British shows where the actors look and act real…Broadchurch is a great example.
Claudia says
Oh, A & E. What are they thinking?
Janice Murphy says
I don’t think there is anything wrong with coloring you hair or wearing makeup etc… It’s all about how you feel about yourself. Beauty comes from within. Some of the most beautiful women on earth have gray hair but they feel beautiful inside and out. Lets face it you can be bright, and accomplished, and compassionate, but if you don’t feel good about about how you look it’s going to affect how you present yourself to the world. If you are happy with the way you look then that’s great. People will really see you, but if not you might as well be invisible. How you feel about yourself is the leading force in your life. If you feel like a piece of crap then believe me you will accept crap in your life. I could give a rats ass about the Kardashians or how Miley Cyrus Acts because at the end of the day none of it really matters. My husband died of cancer when he was 33. If I learned anything from that it was the only thing that is really important is your family and friends and tha knowledge that you did your best in this life, treated people with respect, try not to judge those that are different from you and laughed as much as possible..But the biggest lesson I learned was “don’t sweat the small stuff”
Janice Murphy says
I think the reason the entertainment industry employs all these plastic, Stepford looking people is because a great number of people that watch tv or movies are looking for a way of escaping from real life. They don’t want to turn on the TV and see a cast of realistic looking people. If they wanted that they can just walk out the door. I personally don’t agree with this and wish there were more quality/educational shows being offered, but I don’t see it changing anytime soon unless they see there is money to be made by changing what has made them rich so far. What a drag. I’ll just keep my fingers crossed and hope they wake up!!!
Claudia says
I feel fine about myself! At least most of the time, I do. I choose to not color my hair because I don’t want to be tied to having to deal with roots, etc. I’m too cheap! And you’re right, there is absolutely nothing wrong with coloring your hair. I wear makeup every day that I’m working. I’m really speaking to a society that often doesn’t value anything but youth and a false reality of what beauty is. And the pressure that ensues. Now all actresses feel they have to have work done. So do all newscasters. Or they just might lose their jobs. So sad.
As for as the Entertainment industry, I’m in it. So is my husband. And so are many, many of my actor friends and former students who lose out on opportunities because they don’t look like a Stepford citizen, or because they are of a certain age, or because Reality television has eaten up most of the programming because it plays to the lowest common denominator and is cheap to produce. It’s a sad state of affairs, isn’t it?
I actually disagree a bit with your idea of escape being the reason for plastic looking characters. Television and film have always been a form of escape. And there have been decades of film and television with real characters that are not based on a some bizarre idea of beauty, played by actors who are less than perfect, but real. That didn’t have to have blindingly white teeth. It’s only been in the last 10-15 years or so that things have become so botoxed and wrinkle-free that the paradigm has shifted. Ask my husband. He’s been working in television for almost 40 years. He can really speak to the changes that have occurred.
Thanks for taking part in the dialogue, Janice! I love this sort of thing.
Pat@Back Porch Musings says
I wonder (in dismay) all those things also, Claudia.
Claudia says
Dismay, indeed, Pat. I feel it too.
Donnamae says
Oh my friend…you do speak volumes. I am tired of being discounted not only as a woman, but also as an older member of society. I would still like to know, why in 2013, we do not have equal pay for equal work in this country. You should write a book Claudia, because you write so eloquently, and speak for so many! ;)
Claudia says
WHY don’t we have equal pay? I cannot understand it. It’s unconscionable. Let’s not even get into equal rights, which are still being fought for.
Donnamae says
Here here!!
janine says
Well said Claudia, I love the British tv shows that I hire from the library, I am loving Miss Marple and Rosemary and Thyme. Both have
wonderful actors and no of them are walking around in the stunning English countryside wearing Prada or Jimmy Choo shoes. As for going grey naturally, I am 47 and have decided to no longer colour my hair. You are such an inspiration and you always looks so pretty and I hope that I can look as lovely as you. Enjoy your stay in Hartford and how is the quilt coming along?
Claudia says
I love British tv shows, too, Janine. Don often says he wishes he was acting in England where the possibilities are so much greater for character actors.
I’ve just started hand quilting it, but have a long, long way to go!
Linda says
Wow – you have a lot of reading to do now.
I love the fact that with all the things in the post – that you still gave us beautiful flowers to look at. I don’t know what kind that white flower is, but I really like it. And I agree with all the rest. You and I emailed about this last year – or, the way time slips away it may have been 2 years. Try not to get eye strain. :) Linda
Claudia says
Oh, I’ve read all the comments, Llnda. I love when we have a dialogue here.
That’s a limelight hydrangea, by the way.
Diane says
I understand how you feel Claudia. I feel the same way. The priorities in this country are all screwed up and I think we have to look inward to our own moral character to keep us on the right path. I don’t watch reality shows, never liked the Kardashians and I don’t want to be defined by what the younger so called celebrities do either. I haven’t watched the VMA”s for years, it is so sleazy. I’m more interested in issues of substance and the environment and not with all the superficial stuff. It is discouraging to see so little has changed at times, but I do know that there are a lot of people that feel the way we do. Thanks for starting the discussion and I always enjoy visiting!
Claudia says
Thank goodness there ARE a lot of people who feel this way, Diane. It gives me hope.
Kelley says
Check out the Beautiful Body Project by Jade Beall-no photo shop used. It gives me hope
Claudia says
I will, Kelley. Thanks!
Beth K. says
Preach it, Claudia. I agree. Amen.
Claudia says
Thanks, Beth.
Jan says
We are the invisibles, the forgotten people, at least that’s how I feel. I have just about given up on clothes shopping. I can either dress like my 20 year old daughters or my mother, neither of which is appropriate for my age (55). I could absolutely care less about celebrities or so called superstars or who’s doing what and with whom. When did they become the yardstick by which we should judge ourselves or be judged by? Reality TV? What a load of trash. The quality of todayβs TV programs is appalling, which is probably why I find myself borrowing DVDs from the library just so I can watch something decent. As for Miley Cyrus, sad, just so sad. And you are so right about the double standards that STILL exist in society, has anybody asked Mr. Thicke’s wife how she felt about watching her husbandβs performance? I think not. Thank you Claudia for putting into words how many of us are feeling about today’s society.
Claudia says
You are welcome, Jan.
I totally understand about clothes shopping. So frustrating!
Margaret Bouwmeester says
Very well said!!!! I was just ranting about this to my husband………so I am so glad you wrote the very thing I just finished saying! Enough, we have homeless and starving families in our own countries, I have never seen an ad for them.
Hugs,
Mags
xxx
Claudia says
Well said, Mags!
vicki says
I am afraid Australia is no different than the US. One thing I have noticed that older women have to be categorised in the media, I especially hate the phrase “…..year old grandmother”. Who cares if this person is a grandmother, she is a person first, and why do we have to know people’s ages?
Claudia says
Oh, I was so hoping Australia would be different, Vicki. You raise a good point, why do we always have to know someone’s age? Or that she is a grandmother? Is she defined by either of those things?
Tina says
AMEN AND AMEN!
Claudia says
Thanks, Tina.
Jane says
I am so so sad with this post and the comments. So many opinions that insinuate that our individual thoughts and choices don’t matter….from what we watch on TV, to whether or not we approve of the “work” celebrities have had on their bodies…to direct insults on your part, and the ones of your followers to friends and blogger companions who have made the “brave”:choice to NOT go gray. These opinions are thoughtless and rude to so many.
I say all of this in a gentle way, Claudia, because we are very like~minded and I appreciate your views. The same women who have commented on too much trivial shit on TV can’t spell Syria (and you failed to correct them??). They are very much the same people that complain of being bombarded with overkill of television newscasts of catastrophes like hurricanes and school shootings. They say they turn their TV’s off. Well, what Is important to them? Starving people…abused animal….yet what do they do? Can a five dollar check help? Hell yes. I’m fed up. We are smarter than this. So many women are afraid to express their own views…even in these enlightened days, my God, have opinions, even if they aren’t the same as everyone else. Please tell me we have evolved into a world where we can be respectful individuals and have the grace to accept others beliefs.
I look forward to your thoughts.
Jane
Claudia says
I freely admit I’m more than a bit perplexed and confused here. I’ve re-read my post with a cup of coffee and I don’t see what you’re seeing there. I only speak for myself here and for what I wrote in this post. If you read my words, and I will quote, I said “Why do we hold those in the public eye to impossibly youthful standards?” That’s what I said. I was speaking of a climate in which there is an ever increasing pressure for those in front of the camera to look much younger than they are. As I know many women and men who directly feel that pressure every day while trying to keep working in this industry, I have witnessed it firsthand.
I must admit it hurts to be accused of insulting someone when I didn’t do that at all. I don’t think passing on words of support to women who choose to go gray is automatically insulting those who don’t. You know me better than that. I have never, ever implied anything of the kind on any post I have written, including this one. When I cheer a fellow blogger on who has tried a new hair color, and I have, many times, is that insulting those who choose to go gray? Of course not. And as to correcting someone’s spelling, someone who has taken a valuable moment of their time to leave a comment on my blog? Unthinkable. Never.
But I certainly respect your opinion and embrace your right to share your thoughts here and I’m sorry you found this troubling. You are a valued blogging friend. I don’t expect everyone to agree on this sort of post. Indeed, I encourage dialogue here. I actually thought there was a fairly diverse response from the commenters, with each adding their own individual point-of-view, based on their own, entirely individual, experiences. Just as your comment is based on your own experiences. Everyone has issues that push their buttons or generate an emotional response. I suspect you sense some judgment in the responses, and I agree, we have try to frame our opinions and thoughts in a way that respects others. Opinions, by their nature, imply some sort of judgment if we’re really being honest about things. Nevertheless, it’s always a good lesson and one I really work hard on every day.
xo
Claudia
Dawn says
Jane, I have learned my lesson to never comment on a post with auto correct on. OMG a spelling error. I can’t figure out what you are talking about? Your comment doesn’t seem to fit the post at all. I don’t see Claudia judging anyone, just giving her opinion, which we all have. I am very confused.
Jabe says
Dawn…I couldn’t find your email address so I truly hope you return to find my reply to the above comment. I am sincerely sorry if I offended you when I mentioned the misspelling in your comment. I am not a stickler for grammar and I certainly did not have the right to make an issue of this. To be honest I wasn’t sure what you were talking about because of the spelling error, and then I wondered how someone who watches the news and the coverage of our world events could make such an error. But again…I had no right and I was definitely out of line for insinuating that Claudia should have corrected it. I don’t know what I was thinking. Please accept my apologies.
That said, I do take issue with portions of Claudia’s post and many of the comments, but it’s not my desire to get into a debate with every reader who doesn’t agree with me. I hope you understand that.
Jane
Susan says
Bad behavior gets all the press. Like you, I am saddened by all the cheek implants and botoxed faces. What makes these devotees believe that they look younger? They just look bizarre.
Big Texas Hugs,
Susan and Bentley
Claudia says
I suppose it can be done subtly, and I’ve seen that, but most of the time it isn’t at all subtle.
Tana says
AMEN!! I look at movies and TV and want to yell “I’m still alive!” You wouldn’t know there was one woman over the age of 40 living in the US and having a full life.
Claudia says
It does seem that way at times, doesn’t it?
Verna Stapleton says
Wow. You’ve got us talking (or typing). I was excited to watch a show with my all time favorite older beautiful woman – Diane Cannon – only to be so mesmerized and appalled by the weirdness of her overly plumped up lips, I almost couldn’t watch her closeups. She and the producers may have felt she was lovely at 76, but she looked unnatural and freaky to me. Then I went through the “if I had money and a career in front of the camera.,,would I?” I pretty sure I’d rather be Judi Dench. She’s a natural and she’s radiant, and still manages to play powerful women!! Maybe there is just a time when women need to say enough is enough.
And I agree Mr. Thicke was just as at fault as Miley. Someone must have thought his video was such a zzzzz, it would never have been viewed if there hadn’t been naked young girls parading around in it. I’m assuming his song was chosen for the shock value (were we really shocked since we’ve seen it way too many times at these “award” shows already?). I was under the impression you were supposed to make something people wanted to watch over and over. Not sure what audience they were hoping to entrance, but watching it once was more than enough for me. Can’t wait to see what the superbowl half time will offer up for “shock value” this year. Probably not a viewing of war, vanishing animals, environmental warming or anything that requires thought. Wouldn’t it be wonderful it no one showed up?!!
And while I’m writing, I would like to say I like blogs because they are the output of someone’s thoughts they would like to share with others for the purpose of starting conversation. No, not everyone will agree with your views. But that’s not really the point, is it. So I say…go brave Claudia. Keep writing all the thoughts you have each day and keep others thinking as well.
Thanks for the conversation.
Claudia says
Ah, Verna, thank you for your kind words of support. You have no idea how much they mean to me.
And yes, Judi Dench is the epitome of aging gracefully, I think.
Leanne says
I have had a crazy busy week and then went into the mountains for the weekend and am just home to catch up. I saved your post in my Feedly so I could come back to it and comment. Somebody has blogged about Robin Thicke and what they’re going to tell their sons. I’ve not read that post. It was enough for me to know that it existed. At any rate, the lashing out seems to be another part of the double standard, of where women fit into the picture, so I was glad to see that you also called out Robin Thicke.
Donna@Gardens Eye View says
Claudia I have been wondering much the same…I do not care about these people or shows. What we should be concerned with we just ignore…so sad here. I love British mysteries and it is hard to find them on television at all anymore…all this awful reality TV…yuck