Standing on the porch the other day, I spied these blooms, plus two as yet unopened buds. I think these are the last of my roses. I suppose this could be either good news or bad news. The bad news is saying goodbye to these beauties for another season. The good news is that I thought this particular bush was completely finished with its blooms and then I found these. Glass half-empty vs. glass half-full.
Today I am, unfortunately, feeling half empty. Or more than that – about 3/4 empty. The stress in my life seems overwhelming. Everything seems to be more difficult, scarier, impossible and heartbreaking. I feel like my shoulders and neck are holding enormous tension – that my head won’t stop thinking fearful thoughts. Do you ever have days like this? This year has been a very, very hard one for us and it seems to be continuing. While I often stop to count my blessings and I know there are many blessings, there has been loss, financial stress, loved ones in pain and suffering, fear.
Yes, I’m usually cheerful – especially on this blog. But sometimes it just seems impossibly hard to maintain my cheerfulness. Oh, I’ll get it back. Writing about it helps; and knowing my friends will be reading this and sending positive thoughts my way. This blog/journal is such a wonderful way to share things, usually exciting and good but occasionally sad or scary. I’ve just got to get back to the half-full mentality. Thank you for listening to me.
One positive thing: our own little Lazarus, Mr. Riley, is feeling better. He is almost back to his old self. I am deeply grateful I can leave for Florida with that resolved for the time being. I will try to post while I am in FL. I will also be sharing a book review with you on Thursday. I’ve started to work with TLC Book Tours. Oh, I’m not reimbursed in any way – I’m supplied with a book and encouraged to write an honest review. Since I love reading so much, this is a joy for me. So once a month or so, I’ll share a review with you. I’m reading a few books that I might not have found otherwise so my reading horizons expanding.
Thank you for being the listening eyes and ears that I’ve learned to count on. You are the best.
Glad Riley is feeling better! I am looking forward to the book reviews! Sounds interesting! Chin up Claudia, it is going to get better! Sending you hugs.
We, your bloggist friends, will listen to you any time you need us! Glad to hear about your Riley is better!
With Riley recouperating there is more sunshine in your life.
You are correct when you say that we blogger-gals & pals are sending positive thoughts and energy to you and yours.
Hugs & ♥♥♥s,
Gerry
Hello Claudia,
I’m so happy Riley is doing better. You know what you need??? A massage! You need to go get all the tension massaged out of your shoulders and back, and your hands and feet are also very important. I have been “unofficially” trained in swedish massage, so I know the benefits. In times like this pampering is the key, I know it costs money, but many times its a benefit to your health and that’s always worth the price paid.
Love ya’
Meri
hi claudia,
i can so relate. i blog as a form of self-expression and it’s a great distraction from real life for me. if you knew what really goes on here you’d be shocked!:)
so hang in there and things will work out, in my experience they always do.
~janet
Dear Claudia,
Please don’t be sad.Things will get better for you. Life is full of the unknown and there are challenge’s in our life’s we must face. I think sometimes we are put through the test of life, because God wants us to grow in our faith with him..
Have a sweet day and chin up!
Big hugs, Elizabeth
I have to admit I truly understand what you’re talking about here, sweetpea. I, too, feel overwhelmed at times and wonder how things will progress or turn out. Truly, I really don’t have to worry—it’s in my nature—because I am so truly blessed with so much: house, car, hubby, kids, grand and greatgrandkids. The storm always seems to pass without much significantly depressing happening and when it doesn’t, I just pick up and go on and it’s soon forgotten. Then I’m back thinking why did I fret so? That wasn’t truly bad. Just me…
Hooray for your pup feeling better.
xoxo,
Connie
sweet claudia~i am sure it is hard to feel a little or lots empty. i hope by writing about it has helped. we all have those times and it is not fun. take good card of yourself. this has been a very emotion year for you. hugs and love from a very devoted blog friend~dogwood/cory
Claudia dear,
Yes, sharing some of the stress WILL help you get through all this trauma.
Sending fond thoughts across the miles,
Sharon Lovejoy Writes from Sunflower House and a Little Green Island
I think we ALL have those days, some more than others… and I can relate on many levels. The past four years have been full of upheavels, illness, financial stress and my FIL’s too-young death from Lung cancer.. Sometimes my neck and shoulders feel like they have frozen up… that’s why the term “She carries the weight of the world on her shoulders”… it’s TRUE!!! That’s where all our stress lies.
My grandmother once told me “Don’t worry about things so much… I learned that 95% of the things I worried about didn’t happen, and the things that DID happen, I just had to deal with the best way I could, and one step at a time. Worrying never changed the occurence or the outcome”. She was right.
I’m so sorry you’re having such a difficult time. All I can offer is prayers and happy thoughts that all will be well in time.
Lynea
Claudia, I am so glad that Mr. Riley is almost well. Take that as a positive sign that everything in your world is getting better.
Looking forward to seeing posts from Florida!I will be sending good thoughts your way.
I’ll say to you what my dad would tell me when I went through a very dark period in my life … Better days will come!
((Hugs))
So happy you found some last-of-the-season roses to cheer you! May each day bring an unexpected surprise and delight, no matter how tiny. Keeping you close in thought.
Oh yes Claudia, I know how those days feel. But you are so wonderfully talented at seeing the positive in everything, no matter how simple. Often our fears and worries are worse than actually going through something, although I know from experience that’s not always the case – but I’ve come to realize that for me, my worries keep me out of the moment when I need to be available to someone or something. Keeping present and always looking and moving forward works best for me, even if I’m scared sometimes. Ciao, bella good friend!!
Hi Claudia,
I’m sorry to hear about your being so fearful as of late. I am wondering with the recent passing of your dear friend and other stressful events if it’s just a bit too much at one time. My hubby and I just had a little heart to heart the other day about the world on one’s shoulders and feeling alone in the world. Sounds like that’s what’s happening in your neck of the woods too? YOU have a friend, Claudia… well, actually many, many friends that support you. I keep you in my prayers.
So happy to hear Riley is doing better!
xo~Tracie
I am so thrilled and thankful RILEY IS BETTER. My heart goes out to you as I hear you hurting and being challenged by life right now.I will be thinking of you and praying as you visit your Mom and family. bighugs♥olive
Well, you know how much I love you. Not that that helps matters right now. I wish I could wrap my arms around you at the very least.
Brenda
I thought your title was sad but the roses were so bright and cheery. I am so sorry for your sorrow. I hope the sun shines on you and you will feel the warmth of it.
Oh big hugs sweetie! I am sorry you are having a hard week. I am glad Riley is feeling better I know how hard that is. I do hope your sweet mom is on the mend too. Have a safe trip and I cannot wait to hear about the new book.
Hugs and happy thoughts :)
Lisa
Claudia – you are so loved and respected by all of us.
This is a hard time for many of us- especially those of us who are accustomed to bearing the weight of it all on our shoulders.
Set it down for just a little bit and rest.
Laura-
hi claudia,
so glad to hear that riley is much better.
i hope your florida trip goes well.
thinking of you and sending big hugs, smiles, and peets (a cup that’s 1/2 full … make that overflowing)!
xo
elyse
Claudia ~ you will be in my prayers. Maybe since you thought the roses were finished this is God’s way of telling you things are going to be okay. Safe travels to Florida : )
Just stunning! Love the yellow!
I’m sooo glad that Riley is doing well. I know that it would be torture to leave for FL if he wasn’t better.
I love what Karen’s grandmother told her– I always have to remind myself of that wise concept.
I will be thinking of you and sending lots of thoughts of strength, love, and comfort your way.
Hugs,
Jill
Something I say to myself when it begins to get overwhelming and the worry sets it…”Today, you have everything you need, tomorrow will take care of itself.”
It sounds simple and almost like it can’t possibly help, but it does! Then I also remind myself that using precious energy on worrying about things that are out of my control is a big waste of time.
I am sending courage and confidence…it’s the Twin C’s
xox and hugs Rella
Claudia,
Keep your chin up and your eyes scanning the horizon for that silver lining that is surly there waiting for you. Praying peace and love will enfold you and keep those fears at bay!
Claudia,
I know how you feel. I blame my moodiness on menopause. My poor hubby should just stay at work some days. I hope things gets better for you. Count the good things in your life and you might be surprised how they outweigh the bad. Hugs to you!
Hello Claudia
Lovely to meet you. I came across your blog in Romantic Homes and am so glad I stopped by. Your honesty about life, both the good times as well as the bad makes, for a honest relationship between you and your readers. My life has had many hurdles and crosses to bare, in my blog some stayed around, many left. Life is full of these things, we can’t deny. Therefore to find a fellow blogger who is a confident enough woman and blogger to share both the trials of life and joy, pretty and not so pretty, makes me appreciate those who can relate to life and not write a bunch of fluff. And so in closing, I wish you the best, I hope for you life slows down some and gets easier. I had a terrible few years and made it, lately well a little crummy again! Pleasure to find you, stay true to you! Lori