I have barely slept in the past 48 hours and I’m beyond exhausted, so forgive me if I make this short.

I didn’t watch the debate, though Don did, but I checked in on Twitter and knew what was happening.

I have no words.

OM is that emotional and physical abuser you have most likely encountered at some point in your life. I know I have.

He is unhinged.

I’m shaken to my core.

Anyway, you might just get a pretty picture or two over the next few days. I need to take care of myself. You do, as well. We have been battered and abused for four years. The assault has been relentless. Find a space in which to breathe deep. Do what you need to do to find a pocket or two of peace.

Feel free to leave your thoughts here, friends, though I may not respond.

I am very, very tired and I sure feel older than my years.

Stay safe.

Happy Wednesday.

Suddenly, it’s Autumn. I swear, in the past four days or so, every tree has turned color, leaves are falling, it’s stunning how quickly everything has changed. It feels early this year – we’re not even finished with September yet. I wonder why it’s so early – is it the drought we’ve been having? I don’t know the answer but it seems like it’s moving too quickly. Slow down!

I’m still reeling from the death of Ben. I spent much of the day yesterday communicating with his fellow students on Facebook. We shared memories. We shared our grief. I can’t get him out of my mind, can’t get his family out of my mind. I’ve lost students before; one lovely student at BU suddenly had a heart attack and died, my student John Lentz (in San Diego) was murdered and you’ve heard me speak of that heartbreaking time. And now Ben.

I didn’t sleep all that well last night – too much Orange Man tax info, too much Twitter, then Rachel, etc. I’m not sure if I’m going to watch the debate. Don is, but I’m exhausted and I think I’ll find the whole thing too stressful. I will do some texting for Biden this afternoon.

A little story.

For the past two Sundays, Don has been attending a Unitarian Universalist church service via Zoom. He found this particular service on an online search. It originates from a town in Massachusetts. He really enjoyed the service and the minister’s sermon, which centered on social justice. Afterwords, he entered a couple of ‘rooms’ and spoke with some of the members of the congregation, rather like fellowship after a service in normal times. He was quite taken with the people he ‘met’ – UU principles are very much in sync with Don’s beliefs, so it was a good fit. This past Sunday, he visited via Zoom for a second time. Loved the sermon, raved about the female minister, etc.

Later in the day, I was online and I got a message on Facebook. It was from a friend who I directed in a production of Bye Bye Birdie  when she was in high school – this would have been in 1983 because it was just before I moved to Philadelphia for graduate school. We’ve stayed in touch over the years (that show was a great experience for all of us.) Her message said: Is your Don Sparks the Don Sparks who has been attending my church service on Zoom?

Oh my god. I then remembered that Susanne, who is a Unitarian minister, had been called to a congregation just outside of Boston a few years back. (She went to Harvard Divinity School.) It was her  church that Don was visiting! What are the odds? I mean, what are the odds? My husband connected with a minister who is someone I worked with 37 years ago! Back in Dearborn, Michigan! And it’s someone I have stayed in contact with over the years, thanks to Facebook.

Don couldn’t believe it. Neither could Susanne or I!

Talk about serendipity. Of course, it released a flood of memories of Bye Bye Birdie  and that magical experience we shared. Susanne told me that she was a troubled teen at that time and that I helped her through that. I had no knowledge that she was having a hard time, but I’m always heartened to hear that I’ve made a difference in someone’s life.

I’m so happy that Don knows her now. It truly is a small world.

Stay safe.

Happy Tuesday.

I was going to share a serendipitous story with you today.

But I just found out that one of the finest people I have ever known died yesterday. Ben Hopkin. He was a student of ours in the MFA program in San Diego. Rick and I auditioned him and brought him into the program. We stayed friends for all these years. Husband, father, defender of the marginalized, teacher, actor, director – he was all of that and more. He had been battling cancer and was doing well before he took a turn for the worse. He was posting about RBG from his hospital bed. I thought he would come through. It never occurred to me that he wouldn’t.

He had lymphoma, the same cancer that took my brother.

I am shaken to my core. I really loved Ben. He was kind and compassionate and funny and devoted to his Mormon faith, yet liberal and a feminist. I just found out the terrible news as I was starting to write a post, so please understand that I cannot write about anything other than Ben.

And my dad, whose birthday is today.

Too young. Much too young.

I am heartbroken.

Stay safe.

Happy Monday.