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On Absolutes

December 29, 2014 at 9:24 am by Claudia

tech-notech

I’m thinking out loud today.

Thought I really don’t follow astrology, I am a Scorpio. And Scorpios seem to be people who feel passionately about all sorts of things. That certainly is true about me. I tend to lead with my heart, though I’m getting much better at balancing that with some wise input from my head. It’s something I’ve struggled with over the years.

Some of the things I feel passionately about I wouldn’t change for a second. Those issues and/or beliefs form the core of who I am, who I’ve become during the course of my life. I could not abandon them.

But then there are the new things or changes that I sometimes have an immediate reaction to as in “I will never do that!” These are what I call ‘absolutes.’ I’m sure Don has heard many absolutes spring forth from my lips over the years. He’s a patient guy. He simply nods in acceptance. Though, sometimes he challenges me to look at the whole thing differently, playing the part of the devil’s advocate. That’s a good thing.

One of the things I am working on is releasing my tendency to be quick to judge – whether it involves a person, a situation (which is undoubtedly more complex than I deem it to be) or something new that I tend to immediately judge and reject.

I distinctly remember when cell phones first started to become popular. My reaction at the time? “I don’t want everyone to be able to contact me at any time of the day!” I didn’t want students calling me all the time. I didn’t want someone to be able to call me when I was driving my car. I didn’t want to be ‘on call.’ So I resisted for quite a while. But when Don and I moved across the country, driving two different vehicles, we realized that we needed cell phones to communicate with each other. (We also used walkie-talkies!) And we realized that it was a good idea to have a cell phone in case of emergencies.

I’ve used various incarnations of the cell phone. Now I have an iPhone and I love it. It works well, it takes good photos, I can access my email, which is something I do most often when I’m working away from home. I can check the weather, I can listen to music when I’m sitting on a noisy train headed into the city. I don’t often use it to go online, though I know many people do. I don’t have my head buried in it, either. I use it when necessary and I love it’s convenience. It’s made a difference in my life, which is often spent away from home for weeks at a time.

Yes, I find people who talk loudly and endlessly on their cell phones annoying and rude. Yes, I shake my head at those who walk around the city with their heads downward, immersed in whatever is on their screen. As with anything, there are those who will go overboard, who will push the boundaries of polite behavior. But that doesn’t mean I have to. It’s possible to have and use a cell phone without automatically plunging into the abyss.

My ‘absolute’ changed.

Similarly…the Kindle. If you search this blog I know that you’ll find some posts where I said I would absolutely never get an eReader. No way! I am a book lover and my love of the real deal, the three dimensional kind, is well documented, in life and on this blog.

An ‘absolute.’

Then, last Christmas, my husband mentioned that he wanted a Kindle Paperwhite. Okay. I researched it and found it to be intriguing. I thought about the demands of my life. Weeks spent away from home, a need to have lots of books on hand to read, not to mention the fact that I review books and many of them are easily downloaded as eGalleys/Review Copies. Oh, and I have a LOT of books and limited space in which to store them. The Paperwhite was sounding more and more intriguing. Much to my surprise, I asked Don to buy me one for Christmas!

I learned another valuable lesson. You can exist in both worlds. One doesn’t cancel out the other. There doesn’t have to be an ‘absolute.’ You’ve only to read the book blog or this blog to know how many hardcover and paperback books I buy. The quick answer? A lot.

But I also give away a lot of books because I have no room on my shelves for them.

The eReader gives me the chance to download several books if I’m going away to Hartford, for example, to work for five weeks. (I might add that at the same time I’m in Hartford, I also check out books from Hartford’s library – the three-dimensional kind.) The Kindle gives me access to lots of free books, especially classics. I use the Kindle to download review copies from various sources. It’s been invaluable in discovering new authors to review on Just Let Me Finish This Page and in reviewing books for this blog, as well.

I’ve found that my ‘absolute’ really doesn’t hold water. For me, clinging to that absolute would have narrowed the range of possibilities for me as a reader and book reviewer. Ultimately, it wouldn’t have served me well.

So I happily say, and did say on this blog, that I was wrong. Using an eReader didn’t mean I was abandoning hardcover/paperback books. If anything, I’ve purchased more than ever. I check books out from my local library. Sometimes I love the Kindle/eGalley version of a book so much that I purchase it in hardcover because I want it in my permanent collection.

Despite what some studies have stated, I retain just as much when I read an eBook as I do when I read a three-dimensional book. And, I can get a book immediately, if I so choose.

No abyss. Just, for me, a nicely workable balance between two different methods of reading.

Same thing with blogging, which is ever changing. I can adapt to some of those changes and, at the same time, retain the integrity of my blog. And I can certainly choose the things I want to embrace and reject those things that aren’t right for me. I’ve made a choice recently to accept the fact that there are all sorts of ways in which to blog and that the variety out there means there is something for everybody. It just adds spice to the blog stew and that’s a good thing. I’m letting go of those judgments. And really, what makes me think I have all the expertise and wisdom on any subject? Short answer: I don’t.

Some absolutes need to be re-examined. I find I’m doing that more often.

Heck, I once held an absolute that stated: “I will never get married. I don’t want to lose my independence. I need my alone time. Spending that much time with anyone would either bore me or drive me out of my mind.”

Thankfully, I smacked myself upside the head and re-examined that one when I met Don. I haven’t lost my independence. I do get my alone time. But here’s the thing: I’ve found that being with Don is my favorite place to be. I’m never bored. And if I go out of my mind, it’s not due to Don.

You can have the best of both worlds. One doesn’t negate the other.

Oh, the lessons I keep on learning.

New post up on Just Let Me Finish This Page.

Happy Monday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

 

Filed Under: blogging, books, cell phones, life 40 Comments

Maintaining the Joy of Blogging

October 5, 2014 at 9:52 am by Claudia

Every morning there is construction going on outside my window. Every morning. I’m not kidding. Saturday? Sure! Sunday? Absolutely. I can usually tune it out but I have to admit my annoyance with the whole thing has peaked this morning. And I thought the sound of traffic on our road back home was bad.

I’m ready to take prisoners.

visit home9

And now, on to the meat of this post. There was an article in the New York Times a couple of weeks ago on blogging – specifically about the burnout that can happen to bloggers: When Blogging Becomes a Slog. Several bloggers were interviewed, but the article was inspired by John and Sherry Petersik’s decision to take a break from their amazingly popular blog, Young House Love. I am a faithful reader of that blog, in part because John and Sherry are so genuine, so transparent, and so honest about their projects and their lives. When readers commented about a sense they had that the quality of the blog posts had declined recently (John and Sherry just had their second child and their plate is full) those comments struck a chord with the Petersiks, who had been feeling much the same thing. So they wrote an articulate post about their dilemma and took a break.

Now, the Petersiks and others mentioned in the article are in an upper tier of decor/DIY bloggers who make their living by blogging.  And I would assume that living is not just ‘scraping by’ but a very healthy one. They have created a space on the Web that draws millions of visitors. That’s a lot of ad income, my friends. What has generated that interest, that fan base, are lots and lots of projects and detailed tutorials. Lots of research. Lots of putting money back into the blog to generate more projects. And on and on it goes. But the same thing can be said not only for Big Bloggers but for all sorts of bloggers who work hard to generate fresh content and make an income through their work.

The reader is lucky. The reader gets it all for free. Just one click and there you go.

However, the blogger has created a business that must keep generating content. The pressure increases. There’s competition out there – a lot of it. New projects have to be created. New and fresh ideas – always a tough one, because there’s really nothing new under the sun – have to be designed, made, styled and photographed. And the business becomes a monster that must be fed constantly, or it will consume the blogger.

Add to that the constantly changing set of rules for bloggers. I’m not sure who decides these things and why everyone feels they need to follow them. You must pin a certain amount of pictures/posts a day on Pinterest. You must Tweet. You must link here. Or there. You have to use Google+. Oh and wait, now everyone has to use Stumble Upon…that’s the new thing. And on it goes. Someone says jump and everyone shouts, “How high?”

Soon, the blog is purely about business and for many bloggers that is just fine, it’s a very clear choice that they’ve made, and more power to them. I know bloggers who are making a very good income from making that decision and, truth be told, I’m a wee bit jealous! There’s nothing wrong with creating and designing a blog with business in mind.

But the Petersiks and others have spoken about an essential ingredient in the process that has disappeared lately: joy. The initial thing that drew us to this platform; the joy of blogging, the excitement of writing a post, the happiness that a well-written and crafted post can elicit, the connection to readers, the friends made…all of it can disappear before we’re even fully aware that it’s gone.

I’m just a teeny-tiny blogger in the grand scale of things. My page views aren’t that impressive. My ad income is minimal, just enough to keep this blog going, to pay for hosting and security, and to allow me to pay for a bill or two along the way. If you’ve read this blog for any length of time, you know I’ve wrestled with the whole enchilada: do I put ads on my blog, do I do this or that to generate income, do I start to craft posts specifically with page views in mind, do I pin, do I do what everyone else is doing? I’ll be honest with you – I’ve sometimes been jealous of all those niche blogs that seem to generate much more income than I will ever see. I’ve been a bit resentful.

But I’ve lately really come to terms with it all. I can be no other person than me. I started this blog as a sort of journal of my life. I started it because I love to write, in fact, I need to write and this new world of blogging gave me the perfect outlet for that need. That, along with my love for photography, sealed the deal. That’s what brings me joy. Writing, photographing, sharing – because I want to, not because I have to. That’s the joy. Meeting all of you – more of the joy.

So my coming to terms with it all means that I cannot and will not change the essential nature of this blog in order to make it a business because I can guarantee you that would be the moment when joy would begin to disappear. Are some days easier than others? Yes. Is every post a gem? Absolutely not. I post every day and, let’s face it, pearls of wisdom are not always flowing freely from my brain.

Some of this I’ve said before. But now, now it has gelled, solidified, for me. The pressure to have new content every day in order to generate income can lead a lot of bloggers to post photos from elsewhere on the web, to essentially lift content from other sources, to do more and more sponsored posts, to find something to fill the space because writing fresh content every post is tough. It’s a challenge. It’s just plain hard to think of something new every day, or three times a week.

My choice is to not do that, to not use content or photos from elsewhere. If I started doing that, the heart of the blog would change and it wouldn’t feel right. But that’s purely my choice – it’s what works for me after 6 years of blogging. The biggest change might be a choice in the future to blog six days a week instead of seven. But the jury’s still out on that. We’ll see. I’d even drop a lot of my ads if I could get by without them. I’m not crazy about their look on my site, but they are necessary.

Lucky for me, I don’t have to put all my eggs in one basket. I can’t expect this blog to remain true to my heartfelt vision and, at the same time, be the source of all my income. Never gonna happen. If I was a different kind of blogger, maybe. But even those bloggers like the Petersiks and others mentioned in the New York Times article have spoken about making changes. The Petersiks may look for another source of income, through a different kind of employment. Others have put the brakes on and are going back to their roots.

Even the book blog, my newest creation, was started to share my love of reading and books. I’d love it to eventually reach a wider audience, but if it doesn’t, that’s just fine. It brings me joy.

Blogging is fascinating, isn’t it? I’ve likened it to the Wild West before and I think that still holds true. There’s so much that’s changed since the early days of blogging, for better and worse. And it will continue to evolve. Let’s hope that none of us lose the initial joy that blogging brought to our lives and if we do, that we make whatever changes necessary to get it back again.

Happy Sunday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

Filed Under: blogging 71 Comments

Random Thoughts: Curmudgeon Edition

September 30, 2014 at 8:40 am by Claudia

• First of all, did some of you miss yesterday’s book review? I’m thinking that must be the case because I’m giving away a copy of Deborah Crombie’s newest, To Dwell in Darkness, and where are all the comments? There should be a lot more than there are. You’re not interested in a free hardcover edition of an excellent book?? Really?

• Too much reality television. Too much. As I man the remote here at the hotel, I am stunned by how much of that inferior, lowest-common-denominator stuff there is on the tube. First of all, it’s not reality, it’s pretty much engineered and scripted to appeal to a demographic that likes to slow their cars to gawk at car accidents. Will this trend never end? I find it demoralizing and very sad, indeed. And yes, before you say it, I know there are exceptions in this genre. But very few. So, it’s Law and Order reruns once again.

• What is with ‘gah?’ – I now see it everywhere, including blog posts. Is this the new way of saying ‘yikes’ or ‘oy’ or ‘s*#t?’ I’m not a fan. It’s singularly unimaginative. But then again, those using it don’t care whether I’m a fan or not.

• I have now gone through so much kleenex, I should own stock in Puffs. Or Kleenex with lotion. I bought a mega sized box yesterday, with fingers crossed that it’s the last one I have to buy.

• Why do advertisers assume that any woman of 61 years must be ready for Depends, must have so many aches and pains that she absolutely wants to hear all the product-shill information that pharmaceutical companies have to offer repeatedly on television, must be ready to retire, must be un-hip, must be a mere shadow of who she was? I get so sick of this crap. I see it on television, throughout the media and even in the ad opportunities I get on this blog. It drives me nuts. For the record: I work in the Arts, I don’t need Depends, I’m funny and witty and pretty gosh-darned hip for my ‘age.’ I’m well read, I’m a fighter for social causes, I’m active, I mow a massive front lawn and a back forty that would make your head spin, I am passionate and, my husband tells me, sexy. And I’m a consumer. Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

Stop generalizing about your target groups. All twenty-somethings aren’t alike. Likewise every other age group. Show some originality.

End of that rant.

scout on the road 3

• I know everyone isn’t a dog lover. I get it. But my dog, always on a leash, is – let’s face it – adorable. She’s beautiful. She smiles. She has a twinkle in her eye. And when I’m walking her, she does a little hop on her right front leg that, at the very least, usually brings a smile to a passer-by’s face, and often the question “What’s wrong with her?” It sparks concern. It’s endearing, in a slightly loopy way.

I take no credit for her beauty, of course, but she is beautiful. She is sweet, At this point in her life she barks rarely, and she shyly stops to greet everyone.

But there are those who look right at her as she smiles at them with what I can only describe as a very mean look – a look filled with animosity and/or contempt. It’s very strange. Now, let me assure you, most of the people Scout encounters smile at her, or ask if they can pet her. And I’m not counting those who are busy and whose minds are clearly on something else. I get that.

But mean looks? Those are the people I don’t want to get to know, thank you very much. You are not going to be my friend. Yes, you may be lukewarm on the subject of dogs. You may be a cat person. Or you may be a no-pets-at-all person. I respect that. But a mean look? No. That ain’t gonna cut it.

• Still sick, but slowly getting a bit better each day. It’s now in my chest, but I’m ‘expectorating’ and I just have to be patient. Very tired, of course. But I have a light day today, which helps.

Happy Tuesday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

Filed Under: blogging, dogs, life, media 50 Comments

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Welcome!

Welcome!

I live in a little cottage in the country with my husband. It's a sweet place, sheltered by old trees and surrounded by gardens. The inside is full of the things we love. I love to write, I love my camera, I love creating, I love gardening. My decorating style is eclectic; full of vintage and a bit of whimsy.

I've worked in the theater for more years than I can count. I'm currently a voice, speech, dialect and text coach freelancing on Broadway, off Broadway, and in regional theater.

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