I’ve been so exhausted at night that I fall asleep by 10 pm at the latest and wake up around 5:30. Much of that is emotional exhaustion, but I’m sure some of it is due to the time change. Going through all of Mom and Dad’s things, sorting and making piles of photos and memories – this goes to the grandchildren, this goes to my cousin, this goes to the daughters…all of it is necessary but hard. And I’m determined to do as much as I can while I’m here.
Princess Pirate, complete with skull and crossbones sunglasses – part of his treat bag from school. I think he looks like a British rock star. Quite a bit of swagger, don’t you think?
That’s my furry nephew, Max, in the background. I love all my nephews.
Reading for any length of time is still difficult – it’s hard to lose myself in the pages of a book, though I long to. I have my library book with me – Career of Evil by Robert Galbraith (J.K. Rowling) and I read about 5 or 10 pages at a time, but then, my mind wanders. And that’s not due to the book, which is excellent. And no, I’m not worried about bedbugs in my library books. I read that recently on some blog – can’t remember where. For heaven’s sake, passing along that twaddle is ridiculous. It’s not that it never happens, but that it hardly ever happens. I remember when all sorts of articles were being written about this supposed outbreak a few years back. It has, in fact, been shown that it’s more likely to find them in furniture at the library than in books. Or furniture in a motel. Or furniture in a waiting room. Or displays in stores. And even then? Rarely. I never worry about that and I stay in a fair amount of motels and hotels and, like everyone, shop in stores. They’re simply scare tactics. And then, inevitably, they’re used to try to sell a product. Don’t let that kind of fear-inciting keep you from your local library. Books are to be checked out and used and touched and enjoyed. Libraries are there for all of us and are an essential part of our culture. They need our support.
There’s so much of that kind of fear mongering that goes on, whether it’s through pharmaceutical commercials, political campaign tactics, advertising, or irresponsible news and media coverage and it’s even more prevalent with the 24 hour news cycle and the internet. I find it very troubling and I find it even more troubling that a segment of our population automatically believes anything they’re told.
Hey, I’m tiptoeing onto my soapbox. That’s a good sign, given what the last week has been like.
No, you’re not seeing things. For the first time in about two years, I’ve started an Obsession Scarf. I got this yarn last time I was down here but I didn’t do anything with it. When I was packing, I grabbed some hooks, thinking that it might provide some meditative comfort. But I didn’t get a chance to start it until yesterday. It took a little bit of time for it all to come back, but it’s like riding a bike; the rhythm and moves are still there.
I need to find a new pattern, though. I’m making two of these scarves. Maybe I’ll put them in the long-on-hiatus Etsy shop; who knows?
Don’s CD is back in stock, by the way.
I have a list of things to do today. Calls to make, financial accounts to check, the sort of things that need to be done. So, I’m off.
Happy Wednesday.
Good Morning Claudia. Here’s hoping that your list of things is not too terribly long (though I’m sure it is). Good luck with getting everything done. So nice that your have a swaggering pirate to keep you company – ha-ha. Your scarf looks beautiful. Perhaps you will find working on that somewhat meditative.
I think I will, Vera. And that swaggering pirate makes me laugh a lot, which is exactly what I need right now.
My parents left behind a great rambling house with the accumulation of a lifetime and it certainly added to the stress of their passing. My home is very tidy, but after my heart attack I put together a file folder containing my will and an information form detailing assets/debts and personal information. An application for probate requires a lot of specific information (at least in this jurisdiction), so I would urge everyone to do the same.
Once you’re home, perhaps you’ll be able to rest. The scarf is just beautiful!
We need to do that, so thank you for that reminder, Barbara.
Claudia, Your nephew is so cute. That picture made me chuckle and he is having a good time being a pirate. Take care, Doris
He is adorable. He’s also an angel!
That little pirate would make all tasks seem lighter to me! I saw that post about bed bugs in books and just shook my head. I don’t give in to fear tactics or at least I try not too. Life is too short to live it in fear. I am reading a library book and last night found someone’s crumbs all over some pages…not that is rude but hey not everyone thinks books are to be taken care of like I do. I tried to clean up the pages as best I can (and thoroughly washed my hands, I’m not afraid nor stupid…lol). Sounds like lots is getting done and that is great. I keep waiting for it too cool down so I can pull out my scarfs!
hugs,
Linda
You’re too smart to give into fear tactics, Linda. But yes, washing hands after dealing with crumbs is a good idea!
Lovely colors for an autumn scarf, Claudia. I’m glad you’ve some a little time for yourself, even if you can’t concentrate for long. How nice to have a pirate to keep you amused. Though my girls were older when their Dad died, I found that in those early days I was only living for them. The young give us a reason to go on. The sorting and organizing are difficult, and I find the tossing away distressful. We are doing the same for my late Uncle’s house. Continue to take little breaks, if only for reflection.
I am. Thank you, Wendy.
I don’t envy your tasks…they are not easy…but must be done. I love that little pirate of yours! He surely would cheer me up! Lovely scarf as well….maybe the repetitive nature of knitting/crocheting will temporarily distract you, and let your mind rest. ;)
I’ve been crocheting while I’m waiting on hold, Donnamae!
I detest being on hold…but at least that sounds like a great thing to do while you are on hold! ;)
Applying for Social Security, Donnamae. Long hold time, and lots of frustration!
When I applied, I did it online, and it was quite painless. Hang in there! ;)
Just finished the online app. If I did it via a phone appointment I would have had to wait until December 29th! With application online, I should get a phone call within two weeks.
Alright! One down….! ;)
Oh, Claudia, I commiserate with your loss of reading ability. I have had that happen several times over the past few years when I suffered losses. It takes a while to gain back the ability to concentrate ~ I am sure that is what it is. When I find myself re-reading the same sentence or paragraph about 5 times, and still not knowing what I read, I know I need to stop for a while. I bet the crocheting will help you begin to concentrate and help get your reading mojo back more quickly. And in the process…. a bonus, as that scarf is just beautiful!
Little Buddy could NOT be more adorable. He has to bring a smile to your faces many times a day.
So much to try to get done. It is so wonderful that you are able to be there for each other. I’m sure you are both totally exhausted at the end of every day. Hope you take a bit of time with a cup of tea or coffee each day to unwind together, too, and to just catch your breath. You are very lucky to have a sister who is also a best friend.
xo ?
He is the best tonic for these days – heck, he’s the best tonic for every day!
Its such a difficult time for you and your family, your loss, sorting through your
Dad’s condo, paperwork, and all the memories that photographs, and personal
items bring to the forefront.
Your concentration will be off as far as reading goes for awhile. I learned from library
patrons that after a death, it can takes months to digest what is written on a page.
When my husband died, the same effect happened to me. Your reading habits will
return, just not yet.
Thinking of you all in Florida and Don and Scout in Mockingbird Hill Cottage.
It’s a very difficult time. But we’re doing the best we can. Thank you, Lea.
Love that scarf! Gorgeous! Still praying for you and Mere.
Judy
Thank you, dear Judy.
Ha-ha! I like how your mind wandered to bed bugs. Don’t think I’ve heard the term “twaddle” used before. There’s definitely a lot of it out there. And so many get sucked into believing such hogwash. It’s incredible really how gullible some people are. I remember a friend in the early 90s who believed that you could get herpes if you didn’t wash your bedsheets in bleach every week. Glad to see you are crocheting again. The task of sorting your parents belongings certainly isn’t easy. Take care!
Thank you, Tammy.
Yes, wasn’t it PT Barnum who said there’s a sucker born every minute??
It also took me quite a while to be able to concentrate on reading anything. I remember living in a fog after my Mom’s death and was just coming out of it when I lost my beloved Aunt. Give yourself time and everything will be clear once again. Don’t forget to take naps and be especially kind and gentle with yourself.
Big Texas Hugs,
Susan and Bentley
Thank you, Susan.
It’s so good to see one of your pretty scarves again Claudia…all of these cute pictures of Little Buddy are making me miss the days when my son was little…
He’s pretty adorable, Nancy.
Love the Pirate picture. Nice crochet also. I knit when I’m having upheaval in my life. Working with my hands helps slow down or stop the emotion that keeps going round and round in my head. Losing a parent is painful. It just takes time so don’t expect anything else and don’t push yourself to be “over” it.
Oh, I won’t. I’ve lost a lot of immediate family members and dear friends over the years, starting when I was quite young. I know that grieving is different for everyone. Thanks, Barbara.
Dear Claudia, We certainly don’t get to be our age with out accruing alot of knowledge (or know a lot ) of stuff just from experience. First, I buy books at Goodwill,very old ,often less than sparkling clean used book stores, as well as yard sales. WHAT no bedbugs! There are BIG$$ to be made in the pest control industry. I’m not saying they are less than ethical,but all it takes is one good rumor. Remember the black widow in the girls “ratted hair.”
Don’t worry about anything different that happens in your head right now,(obviously something very outrageous needs attention) this shock, this, grief is physiological,and your body is scrambling to get things back in balance.It will take as long as it takes. Meantime, Love Claudia, and Meredith,and soak up all the, Love, sympathy, and support, everyone around you is wanting ,and trying, to provide.My Love, Faith,and prayers are with you two little Orphan gals tonight. Judy A-
And this particular post was sponsored….for a pest company. Unbelievable and irresponsible.
Thank you for your kind words, Judy. xo
OK – LIttle Z might just become ‘Captain Z’ – he is so cute ! Love the colors in the scarf you are crocheting – reminds me of the lovely Autumn pictures you’ve posted on your blog recently. Sending prayers and good thoughts your way as you all deal with the paperwork and sorting out.
Hi Claudia, you and your family have been in my thoughts since your dad became ill. We lost my dad in February, it was quick and for that I was thankful. Besides sadness, I mostly remember a strange sense of a void. Eight years earlier we lost our mom Lily, and cleaning our her personal items was overwhelming, but important, and I’m glad that I spent the time sorting things out for family members just like you are doing. Although we don’t really need things to remember, it’s always comforting to see something from my mom or dad in my home; like a needlework piece and Irish shawl that belonged to my mom. For my dad it’s different, he seems to pop into my thoughts at random, either with something that I hear or see. It’s funny how memories work. We played a beautiful Irish ballad called ‘The Old Man’ for my dad the day of his funeral…listen to it if you have a few minutes. xxxooo