Mockingbird Hill Cottage

A little daffodil coming out of the gravel by the porch. This particular daffodil is really abundant this year; both in the big garden bed and just beyond the shed. Gorgeous blooms.

My aim was to take it easy yesterday but, of course, I ventured outside and started to weed and clean up the borders of the beds. I finally dug out a rose bush that was nearly dead. It’s just a pain in the tush and it’s right by the Annabelle hydrangea, so getting rid of it will give me access to the Annabelle, should I need to severely prune it. Still watching it, by the way. Some new shoots are showing up near the ground, but I think I’ll have to cut a lot of it back.

Then I moved more gardening tools that I’d stashed on the porch to the shed.

My back was complaining so I stopped.

Which brings me to some questions you had in yesterday’s comments – basically, “Where do I get my energy?”

If you heard Don and I moan and groan about sore muscles, especially after we’ve mowed or done other work outside, you’d quickly realize that there is a trade-off involved with any outdoor chore these days. And it can be depressing. We hate that we get so tired and sore.

I have had to cope with the fact that I can’t work for hours outside like I used to. But I can work for 2 or maybe 3 hours. Afterwards, I’m tired and I generally have a sore muscle or two. Plus, I have bad allergies. The air is full of pollen. Working outside has consequences.

So I work in spurts. Sometimes I wear a mask. I always wear sunglasses to try and keep pollen out of my eyes. I did a lot yesterday. Today I’m sore and congested. So I’ll take the day off from outdoor chores and rest my back.

All that being said, Don always tells me I have great stamina. Look, I’m 69 and I’ll turn 70 this year. Don is turning 71 next month. We have to make adjustments. But if I want something done, I’m going to do it. Period. (The Hill girls are as stubborn as the day is long.)

For me, it’s all about getting back into shape after a sedentary winter. Truth be told, I tend to think of myself as lazy. And I am in some cases. But I’m not at all lazy when it comes to gardening or yard work. I love it. That makes a huge difference. It’s also a great form of exercise for someone like me who doesn’t like to exercise. I love to mow. So does Don. The first time we mow each spring is the hardest. We have a push mower and we tag team, but we have a lot of lawn on this property and it has to be mowed. Each time we tackle it, we gain more stamina. It will get easier each time as we develop our muscles. Same with garden chores. When Don is away, it takes me much longer to mow the front lawn. I take frequent breaks. I drink a lot of water.

I try my best to have a “Can Do” attitude. If it needs doing, I do it. There are a lot of  ‘aging’ voices in our heads telling us we can no longer do this or that because we’re older. It’s easy to fall prey to those messages. I certainly do at times. And of course, I have to balance positive thoughts with practical thoughts, like ‘your back is hurting, it’s probably time to stop for the day.’ But I work very hard to think of age as a number and not something that defines me or the things I can do.

When I first moved to Brooklyn last fall, I was exhausted from the many flights of steps I had to take every day and all the fast walking I had to do to get to various locations. I wasn’t in shape for city living. When I was younger, I lived in big cities and the walking that was required each and every day kept me in great shape. (I miss that.) Back to the steps: I had to climb 2 very steep flights to my apartment. I had to climb several flights every day coming out of the subway and, in some cases, when transferring to another subway line within a station. My knees hurt. I was seriously out of breath.

It slowly got easier. I was still a bit short of breath, but less than I had been. Sometimes, depending on what point in the day it was, I had no problem at all. So, by the time I moved back home, I’d lost weight and I was in pretty darned good shape for a 69 year old who was routinely working 12 hour days with two more hours tacked onto that number for travel. I was tired most of the time, but that was because of the long, long days – something I hadn’t done since I was in my 30s.

I had to do it, so I did it. Sometimes, when talking to Don on the phone, I cried because I was so tired. I would say that I was too old for this. But, in the end, I proved that I could do it and that was a big victory for me.

Anyway. It’s not that I’m special or that I’m an athlete (hardly!) or that I’m in great shape. I just do it. And when it’s hard for me, Don often reminds me that I have more stamina than I think I do.

We cannot do what we used to in the way we used to, so we make adjustments. It can be disheartening at times, but the key is to not let it get you down. Make whatever adjustments are necessary. Work in shorter spurts.

We can’t afford to have someone mow our lawn every week. We can’t afford to have a gardener. And frankly, we like mowing. I like gardening. I wouldn’t want to turn those jobs over to anyone else. Some day we’ll probably have to – certainly in terms of the snow – but for now, we don’t. Not by a long shot.

Plus, you know I live for the spring when I can garden again. It brings me joy. And things that bring us joy are worth doing.

Let’s close with a photo of my nearly fully opened lilacs.

It’s going to be warm and sunny today, so I expect them to full open and then I’m going to pay them a visit and breathe in that heavenly scent.

Finished A Line to Kill  by Anthony Horowitz and I’ve just started Something to Hide  by Elizabeth George.

Stay safe.

Happy Wednesday.