Mockingbird Hill Cottage

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I Can’t Quite Partake

November 5, 2015 at 8:46 am by Claudia

10-3 pottery in hutch

I’m resorting to already-seen photos of the dollhouse. There isn’t much time in my days here in which to take pictures and I’ve only got my iPhone with me.

I had so wanted to drive down to the big miniatures show in Philadelphia this coming weekend. It’s called Philadelphia Miniaturia. I’ve never been to a miniature show and I’ve always wanted to attend one. Now that I have a reliable car, I was all set to go. But life intervenes and I just can’t do it. Maybe next year?

I see so many wonderful posts from my fellow dollhouse lovers that chronicle the amazing mini treasures they find at these shows. I, in fact, have been the lucky recipient of several miniature show treasures – gifts from my blog readers.

Waaah.

Patience is a virtue, Claudia. Patience.

I’ve been canceling accounts, finding out what bills my Dad had on Auto-Pay, making all sorts of inquiries and sorting pictures and memories into three piles for my brother’s children. We found a lot of pictures of my brother when he was a little boy, along with letters and cards he sent to my mom and dad, and we thought they would like them. My brother died in 1991, when his eldest child was 16. They’ve been without a dad for a long, long time.

We’ll be doing more work at my dad’s condo this afternoon. It’s very hard being there – it’s very hard seeing the cats waiting for him. It’s very hard seeing my dad’s oil paintings hanging on the wall. Let’s face it, it’s just plain hard being in a place that, not all that long ago, was a haven for both of my parents.

Life continues on, but I find I have very little desire to read blogs right now. I’m trying, and I do read some posts, but I have no interest in the latest fall mantels, if you know what I mean. I’m reading some blogs but I haven’t left any comments. I’ll get back in the swing of things, but it will take a while.

You know how it is; you’re aware that life is going on around you, but you can’t quite partake in it. That’s how it is right now.

I had a little boy sitting on my lap this morning and that sure helps.

Happy Thursday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

Filed Under: Dad, dollhouse, miniatures 54 Comments

Coping

November 4, 2015 at 8:25 am by Claudia

I’ve been so exhausted at night that I fall asleep by 10 pm at the latest and wake up around 5:30. Much of that is emotional exhaustion, but I’m sure some of it is due to the time change. Going through all of Mom and Dad’s things, sorting and making piles of photos and memories – this goes to the grandchildren, this goes to my cousin, this goes to the daughters…all of it is necessary but hard. And I’m determined to do as much as I can while I’m here.

11-4 princess pirate

Princess Pirate, complete with skull and crossbones sunglasses – part of his treat bag from school. I think he looks like a British rock star. Quite a bit of swagger, don’t you think?

That’s my furry nephew, Max, in the background. I love all my nephews.

Reading for any length of time is still difficult – it’s hard to lose myself in the pages of a book, though I long to. I have my library book with me – Career of Evil  by Robert Galbraith (J.K. Rowling) and I read about 5 or 10 pages at a time, but then, my mind wanders. And that’s not due to the book, which is excellent. And no, I’m not worried about bedbugs in my library books. I read that recently on some blog – can’t remember where. For heaven’s sake, passing along that twaddle is ridiculous. It’s not that it never happens, but that it hardly ever  happens. I remember when all sorts of articles were being written about this supposed outbreak a few years back. It has, in fact, been shown that it’s more likely to find them in furniture at the library than in books. Or furniture in a motel. Or furniture in a waiting room. Or displays in stores. And even then? Rarely. I never worry about that and I stay in a fair amount of motels and hotels and, like everyone, shop in stores. They’re simply scare tactics. And then, inevitably, they’re used to try to sell a product. Don’t let that kind of fear-inciting keep you from your local library. Books are to be checked out and used and touched and enjoyed. Libraries are there for all of us and are an essential part of our culture. They need our support.

There’s so much of that kind of fear mongering that goes on, whether it’s through pharmaceutical commercials, political campaign tactics, advertising, or irresponsible news and media coverage and it’s even more prevalent with the 24 hour news cycle and the internet. I find it very troubling and I find it even more troubling that a segment of our population automatically believes anything they’re told.

Hey, I’m tiptoeing onto my soapbox. That’s a good sign, given what the last week has been like.

11-4 obsession scarf

No, you’re not seeing things. For the first time in about two years, I’ve started an Obsession Scarf. I got this yarn last time I was down here but I didn’t do anything with it. When I was packing, I grabbed some hooks, thinking that it might provide some meditative comfort. But I didn’t get a chance to start it until yesterday. It took a little bit of time for it all to come back, but it’s like riding a bike; the rhythm and moves are still there.

I need to find a new pattern, though. I’m making two of these scarves. Maybe I’ll put them in the long-on-hiatus Etsy shop; who knows?

Don’s CD is back in stock, by the way.

I have a list of things to do today. Calls to make, financial accounts to check, the sort of things that need to be done. So, I’m off.

Happy Wednesday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

 

 

Filed Under: books, crochet, Dad, libraries, Little Z 35 Comments

The Ring

November 3, 2015 at 7:53 am by Claudia

11-3 sunset

Some of you already read this news in my comment replies yesterday or on my Instagram feed, but if you haven’t, I’ve decided to spend a few more days down here. It became very clear that it was too soon for me to leave; my sister wasn’t ready for me to leave. Neither was I. When I texted her at work later in the day and suggested staying a bit, instead of a protest, she immediately texted one word: Yes. So, with Don’s blessing and support (even though he was disappointed that he wasn’t going to see me last night) I changed the reservation and I’ll be here until Saturday.

There are still things to be done; phone calls I can make while Meredith is at work, lists to be made, and, even though we spent Saturday and Sunday sorting through the most personal of my parents’ possessions, there is obviously a lot more sorting to do. And we have to find a home for the cats. Stacy has offered to take them, but she has 3 cats and 3 dogs already. I’m a little worried about these two cats who have lived a quiet life with my parents, who have never known anything but life with each other and, most recently, my dad. My dad wanted them to be adopted as a pair. That’s a tough order. And Lydia is like a watch cat. She can be very testy. Luke is a doll. So…what do we do? I’m praying a solution that will be the best possible scenario will come. As it is, we walk in the door at the condo to see Lydia sitting in my mom’s chair, watching the door, waiting for Dad to come home. It breaks my heart.

11-3 mom's ring

A moment from my dad’s last hours: I inherited this ring from my mom. Dad gave it to her for their 60th wedding anniversary and she wanted me to have it. I don’t wear it all the time, only on special occasions. As I was throwing things in my suitcase last Wednesday, I saw it on my dresser and a gut feeling told me to put it on my finger. So I did.

At one point during the many hours at Dad’s bedside, I was sitting on his right, holding his hand. His finger found the ring. As Meredith, my brother-in-law, and I watched, his finger started to stroke the ring, moving slowly back and forth.

He knew the ring. He knew the shape and the texture. And as Meredith says, my hands and skin are like Mom’s. My hand felt like my mom’s. I was channeling my mother for my dad. It was an amazing moment. From that point on, whenever I could tuck the ring under one of his fingers, I did.

I’ve been trying to read my book, but it’s been hard for me to concentrate. Nevertheless, I tote it wherever I go, trusting that my reading instinct will kick in.

11-3 littlez2

And there’s a little boy who is demanding a lot of my attention.

Happy Tuesday.

ClaudiaSignature140X93

 

Filed Under: Dad, Little Z 46 Comments

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Welcome!

Welcome!

I live in a little cottage in the country with my husband. It's a sweet place, sheltered by old trees and surrounded by gardens. The inside is full of the things we love. I love to write, I love my camera, I love creating, I love gardening. My decorating style is eclectic; full of vintage and a bit of whimsy.

I've worked in the theater for more years than I can count. I'm currently a voice, speech, dialect and text coach freelancing on Broadway, off Broadway, and in regional theater.

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